all 170 comments

[–][deleted] 277 points278 points  (37 children)

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just be yourself is great advice, if you're a very high value guy. that's the guy theyre all imagining.

[–]Kepaso 152 points153 points  (11 children)

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Women tend to imagine a man's life through the 20 top %. Whether in sex : just be yourself, attracting women is easy. Or in politics/economy : '' all politicians and CEOs are men!'' They don't look backward to see that most of the homeless are men too.

[–]icanteventhecat 165 points166 points  (2 children)

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I noticed that too. "Just get laid. Guys do it all the time don't they?" "I know guys who get women so easily!" "You don't understand, everyone takes you seriously because you're a man. No one ever does things for me." "Men have it so easy."

The struggles of the bottom 95% of men are literally invisible.

[–]HydrogenxPi 77 points78 points  (0 children)

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And hence, feminism.

[–]Link_GR 28 points29 points  (0 children)

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Because they are invisible to them...

[–]TheeRyanGrey 46 points47 points  (3 children)

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this. 100%.

never forget the inevitable solipsism of women: they are hypergamous and can only envision men THEY want to be with, the superior male. Because of this they can only imagine men's live's like that.

[–]heli_elo 5 points6 points  (2 children)

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You are so god damned right. This is why women are able to bitch about how poorly they are treated by an alpha straight to a betas face and say "you just don't understand how hard it is!"

Completely oblivious.

[–]TehFuggernaut 2 points3 points  (0 children)

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If a girl you want to bang ever whines to you about another guy, don't stand for that shit. Tell them they're complaining to the wrong guy and change topics completely or walk away/ignore for a while.

[–]icanteventhecat 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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Before swallowing, I had a female friend (9/10) whine how Mr. Handsome Hot-shit Exec was going hot and cold. Surprise! You're just a plate to him, but the guy you cheated on really loved you.

[–]dirtboxchampion 20 points21 points  (1 child)

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I want to achieve at least 50% female representation in homeless people by 2040.

[–]underdogmilitia -1 points0 points  (0 children)

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This will happen.

[–]Aaron565 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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[–]JohnGalt316 66 points67 points  (9 children)

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jby sucks even if you are a high value guy because every girl will try to marry you

women don't mind fucking a good looking drug addict on the first date because they don't want to stick around for multiple dates

but women are going to be a lot more careful around a good looking doctor. they don't want to give it up and look like a slut.

that is why game/redpill is essential even for high value guys

[–][deleted] 65 points66 points  (4 children)

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Some of the most attractive high value men I know (male models, musicians, etc) have the laziest game. They are so used to girls hitting on them that they've never really have to develop their own game. They can be out gamed by a guy with lower value, but they hardly try to compete bc there are plenty of women out there for them. The real problem is if their lazy game starts to bleed into other parts of their life like their career. Developing game for girls flexes the same muscles needed to game one's career. These guys are in their 30's now but unless they get their game on they won't make enough $$$ to keep their status up and competing when they're in their 40's.

[–]RoulantG 6 points7 points  (0 children)

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You are a genius. You get it.

[–]kneeonbelly 1 point2 points  (2 children)

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Makes me think of straight A students who get to college and can't coast along on just smarts anymore vs the average student who had to study and prepare a lot more. The "average" student can end up doing better by putting in more effort and having a stronger work ethic developed.

[–]Condorman80 10 points11 points  (1 child)

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That was my experience. Rude awakening when I got to college because HS was sooo pathetically easy. Great job public schools.

[–]A_Seabear 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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Truth. I regret my parents not sending me somewhere more competitive for high school as the first two years of college made me its bitch.

[–]1Jaereth 18 points19 points  (1 child)

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that is why game/redpill is essential even for high value guys

This is invaluable advice.

I got a little bit of a "late start" in life. After high school, I decided I wanted to play in a rock band and pretty much live the party lifestyle life for a few years. Then I got my shit together, finished school and started my career.

So now my hair is cut, my beard is shaved, I dress professionally, and have a good deal of proof (beautiful condo, car, motorcycle etc) that I make a good salary, you wouldn't BELIEVE the difference in the way I am treated by women. While just casually hooking up used to be a pretty simple and stress free proposition, women I met after my lifestyle change act like i'm asking for the fucking keys to the tower of London when I want to sleep with them. Also, there is a big increase in what I mentally consider a "princess" attitude. Like i'm CONSTANTLY being evaluated to make sure i'm good enough to be considered as a mate.

This just boggles my mind. We accept as fact that AWALT. This means when some woman sits across from you and acts like "Oh you might be good enough to get a piece of my pussy, but i'm still undecided, you're still being evaluated", this is the same woman who will essentially fuck the grungy guitarist from a unknown local band at a party after a show.

And to me, I find this incredibly insulting. If you are successful in life, as a man, you need to frame your interactions with women to your benefit. You need to ask them about what they are up to. You need to approach dates as if you are screening her to see if she is really acceptable for you to spend time/energy on. (And this isn't just framing, you really should be doing that as well).

I guess I kinda rambled here, but it just pisses me off how arrogantly some women approach dating.

[–]Condorman80 6 points7 points  (0 children)

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Agree 100%!
Especially on the end. It's so much better when you shift to being a buyer instead of a seller. "No, you show me what you've got to offer" is a much better and more honest frame than "what magic tricks can I do to get them into bed with me".

[–]another1takesthepill 6 points7 points  (0 children)

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sometimes high value guys create attraction in every girl's mother and that is unfortunately no way to get the girl because "pressure"

[–]tigolbittiez 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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Well, maybe if they are looking for those kinds of women. As for the rest of the time when they just want a good time, they can pretty much get it. There are plenty of women ready to have sex after the first date with a high value guy.

[–]foghorn19 118 points119 points  (2 children)

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that's the guy theyre all imagining.

They are imagining themselves. They advise men to go about it the way they go about it themselves: just show up with the pussy attached and attract men like flies to shit. Problem solved.

[–]16 Endorsed ContributorCyralea 36 points37 points  (0 children)

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This is precisely it. This is why the fisherman/fish analogy holds so well; the fish just minds its own business until it's caught, no work involved. The fisherman has to get good at what he does to catch any fish.

In all my long years of life I've only ever met two women who truly understood mating dynamics from the male perspective, and both were lesbians. Hetero women have absolutely no idea how complex and difficult it is.

[–][deleted] 24 points25 points  (0 children)

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nah it's more that that's all women in their solipsistic fantasy world have to do. unless they're horribly deformed or 10/10 unaccountably gorgeous they will be approached so often that all they have to do is passively wait.

[–][deleted] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

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And of course, your Mom thinks your high value because she's your Mom. LOL

[–]dreckmal 14 points15 points  (3 children)

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That is why it is terrible advice coming from the mother. She loves her son unconditionally. She cannot see his flaws as being detrimental (if she sees them at all).

She gives him what could be great advice, if he actually were the person she sees.

[–][deleted] 14 points15 points  (1 child)

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hence why boys need fathers

[–]dreckmal 3 points4 points  (0 children)

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Agreed.

[–]Condorman80 5 points6 points  (0 children)

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[–]rebuildingMyself 4 points5 points  (0 children)

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just be yourself is great advice, if you're a very high value guy. that's the guy theyre all imagining.

Or a woman

[–]Xiudo 4 points5 points  (1 child)

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I think women say "Just be yourself" because they honestly think this is the truth, and for women it is. All a women need to do is nothing and they will have a line up of men that will gladly be their mate. They are born with their "high value" and it decays over time. unlike men who are born without "value" and must build earn and cultivate it.

[–]chill_geddy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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SWISH!!!

[–]fx-115es 0 points1 point  (1 child)

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it's a great advice in any way! what women really trying to tell us is this: if you pretend to be someone else and i buy in to this. i eventually will find out who you are and after i've done that. i will spend every moment of our relationship to make you the man you pretended to be, when we first met.

[–]RoulantG 9 points10 points  (0 children)

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Instead of pretending to be that man, work on becoming that man so it isn't a facade.

[–]iKill_eu -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

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prince charming fallacy right there y'kno.

[–]Crackerjacksurgeon 135 points136 points  (1 child)

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Well no shit, from women's perspective relationships and sex 'just happen'... because the man puts in all the planning, effort and approaching!

[–]frazzleddd 46 points47 points  (0 children)

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Exactly. They don't think they're being gamed so she logically thinks that men that were trying to get her were just themselves. Its all fits perfectly in the hamster wheel

[–][deleted]  (13 children)

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[deleted]

    [–]16 Endorsed Contributorzyk0s 8 points9 points  (11 children)

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    And this is another proof of female solipsism. When the son asks how to be successful, he wants a strategy that works for him, not something that benefits all womanhood.

    When asked how to find a good husband, no father has ever told his daughter "learn how to give good blowjobs".

    [–]get_it_together1 2 points3 points  (10 children)

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    No, but a good father might say "Find what interests you and pursue it, stay healthy, don't be too promiscuous."

    [–]16 Endorsed Contributorzyk0s 1 point2 points  (9 children)

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    Which is good advice and helps the daughter instead of the male collective. That's my point, women's advice are constrained by what would be beneficial to women, the benefit of the person asking for advice is secondary to it.

    [–]get_it_together1 -1 points0 points  (8 children)

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    Someone else pointed out that he received beneficial advice from his mother and sisters about both increasing his SMV (grooming) and learning how to interact with women (poking fun and teasing). This is good advice, as teasing necessarily takes the target off of a pedestal.

    In other words, if you believe something is true about ALL women, you're clueless.

    [–]Aaron565 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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    Yes, not ALL women are like that. But MOST are.

    Not all people who have killed are bad people. But most are, because they are fucking murderers.

    See, logic.

    [–]16 Endorsed Contributorzyk0s 1 point2 points  (6 children)

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    What is that I hear? Could it be... NAWALT?

    Having one counter-example hardly invalidates the rule. And I even have to question whether it's a counterexample, because it doesn't contradict what I said: grooming, teasing women do benefit the woman collective, so the primary concern is met. If you think that what I meant was that all women are conniving bitches conspiring against their own sons, I think you may have reading comprehension issues.

    [–]get_it_together1 0 points1 point  (5 children)

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    The problem with AWALT is that it's a generalization, and this means there are counterexamples, and it's possible to live a happy life without interacting with women who display the negative behaviors so frequently disparaged on here.

    Teasing does not benefit the female collective, because it is a tool by which a male can increase his perceived SMV without altering anything fundamental. Regardless, you're trying to argue that anything that women suggest that actually increases male SMV is benefiting women, which means that if women suggest TRP they're benefiting the woman collective, which makes your argument pretty much shit.

    [–]1blahbergstein 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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    Just a note about AWALT, because I think the main point about it is being missed.

    All women are like that, but some are more like "that" than others.

    It's a spectrum, not every woman is going to be the epitome of "that" and there will be some women who do try to rectify the "that" in themselves and trying to not be like "that" (eg: /r/redpillwomen). Not every aspect of "that" will apply to every woman. But some aspect of "that" will apply to every woman.

    [–]Aaron565 0 points1 point  (1 child)

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    Everything you are saying is agreeable, but the fact is I've noticed, personally, that women tend to do whats best for them at least 90% of the time.

    Its not because they are women, its because they were raised like women. A boy is told to get the fuck up and work. A girl is told she should be accepted no matter what she does. Also daddy will pay for everything.

    [–]get_it_together1 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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    Everybody should do what's best for them 90% of the time, and some would argue more.

    Find a girl who's parents didn't pay for everything, there are plenty of them out there. If you're really lucky you'll find the girl who was raised like a dude, who helped her dad fix his car and rode motorcycles, jet skis, and snowmobiles with him. Then you can ride snowmobiles, jet skis, and motorcycles with both of them.

    [–]16 Endorsed Contributorzyk0s -1 points0 points  (1 child)

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    it's possible to live a happy life without interacting with women who display the negative behaviors

    Really? I understand you speak from experience and that not one of your female relatives, colleagues, friends, SO of friends or any woman you interact with on a regular basis display female solipsism. You being hit by lightening today is also possible, but I doubt it stops you from leaving your home.

    Teasing does not benefit the female collective, because it is a tool by which a male can increase his perceived SMV without altering anything fundamental.

    So stand up comedy does not benefit the audience, because it's the tool of the trade of comedians and allow him to make a living? Teasing makes women giggle, it's something they love and being at the receiving end of it does cost them a thing. Remember, it's not a zero sum game, something can be good for both genders. Who would've thought?

    you're trying to argue that anything that women suggest that actually increases male SMV is benefiting women

    I said no such thing. What I did imply is that anything that increases male SMV while not also benefitting women is unlikely to ever be given as advice from said women. If you don't understand the different, read up on formal logic.

    I'll leave this conversation with Rollo's piece, if that doesn't convince you, you should consider being more overt with the shining armor and horse.

    [–]get_it_together1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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    I should have clarified - it's possible to live a happy life without trying to have sex with women who exhibit unwanted behaviors. I'm in science, so most of the other women I interact with have PhDs and behave themselves professionally. I wonder if maybe I'm just lucky in that I don't have to deal with it.

    I understand the different [sic], but you're being obtuse. Telling a male to learn how to interact with women and groom himself helps women, but telling a woman to be interesting and exercise doesn't help men? Sounds like rationalization to me...

    [–]gohammer3 51 points52 points  (3 children)

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    Growing up when I asked my mother and older sister how to get girls they would tell me to stay well groomed and to just poke fun and tease them, I've never gotten jby from them. I just wish my dad actually spent time with me and gave me advice growing up.

    [–]RoulantG 15 points16 points  (0 children)

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    I know that feel. It fucking sucks, it's like you missed out on a whole bunch of knowledge. Gotta figure it out yourself now.

    [–]bigbuzd1 6 points7 points  (0 children)

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    Same here, my dad was old fashioned an set in his ways. Work, sleep, newspaper, fishing once in a blue moon. No advice on women, cars, life...I loved him anyway and learned by watching him that his compassion for others was his greatest lesson to me.

    Everything else I had to learn on my own, with sometimes disastrous results, lol.

    [–]Aaron565 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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    Because a single mother dont need no man.

    Its horrible how disposable men are today.

    [–]Last_of_the_Knights 25 points26 points  (14 children)

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    It's good advice for like....5% of people.

    [–]Evolved_Red -1 points0 points  (13 children)

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    It's good advice for like....5% of people.

    20% of men, actually.

    [–]MartialWay 40 points41 points  (8 children)

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    The Pareto Principle stopped being literally true in this matter about 30 years ago. It was indeed gone from 20% to more like 5%. The Wiki article you linked gives examples of situations where 20% just doesn't cover it.

    [–][deleted] 26 points27 points  (1 child)

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    Totally agree. Do we really think that 20% of the men in the US are badasses? That seems like a gross overestimation from what I've personally witnessed. Frankly, the last time that I was friends with men who wore the pants in their marriage was in the 80's. Yeah, I had to go that far back.

    After WWII, okay, I'd buy it. 2014 - no way.

    [–]Dream4eva 13 points14 points  (0 children)

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    1 in 20 does sound more plausible than 1 in 5

    [–]Dick_Rockhard 1 point2 points  (5 children)

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    The Pareto Principle stopped being literally true in this matter about 30 years ago. It was indeed gone from 20% to more like 5%. The Wiki article you linked gives examples of situations where 20% just doesn't cover it.

    That would've made me a five percenter from high school and I find that difficult to accept. Has engaging girls and getting your dick sucked really gotten that fucking difficult?!

    [–]TheDon835 3 points4 points  (0 children)

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    Yes.

    [–]Aaron565 1 point2 points  (3 children)

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    You aren't in high school anymore now are you?

    Also that type of girl who sucked your dick is now empowered by society.

    [–]Dick_Rockhard 0 points1 point  (2 children)

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    Nope, not in high school anymore. I'm in real estate. But highschool wasn't that long ago and I didn't think that only 5%of my male peers were getting some with any regularity. I mean, my game wasn't amazing. I just followed Rule #1: Be attractive. Don't be unattractive.

    [–]Aaron565 1 point2 points  (1 child)

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    I know im one of the more popular kids. But it would be plain ignorant of me to ignore all of the guys who are not getting girls, which is at a minimum 80% if them.

    I only know this because I used to be one of them.

    [–]Dick_Rockhard 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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    I wasn't ignoring them per se. I was still studying, partying and hanging out with these people. I simply wasn't privvy to their respective sex lives or lack thereof.

    [–]Epicureanist 12 points13 points  (3 children)

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    The numbers are irrelevant, no one knows what percentage it truly is; the takeaway is just that most men aren't getting pussy and are not attractive to women.

    [–]Last_of_the_Knights 1 point2 points  (2 children)

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    So check this out. When I go talk to a girl, instead of using tricks on a tactical level and working up, I start higher up at the strategic level and work down. "How do I want this interaction to go, based on what I am? How do I get there from where I am right now." Aviate, navigate, communicate - where are you, where do you want to be, what has to happen to get there. It's completely authentic, no facade. You don't have to say something witty to open a conversation and "demonstrate higher value" - you can literally lean over and say - "Hi. How are you?"

    If you're in the 5%, they'll figure it out in like 3 seconds. If you have to tell or show someone that you are something, you are not.

    What does the baddest motherfucker in the world say when he walks into a bar? Nothing.

    [–]Aaron565 0 points1 point  (1 child)

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    Saying "Hi, How are you?" while being completely outcome independent is game.

    Im not too sure you understand the concept of game. Its to emulate how a natural does it, not create some sort of perfect formula.

    [–]Last_of_the_Knights 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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    yeah - I'm saying, get away from all that, do something to earn a place among the 5%. Forget about game.

    [–]1mr_throwz 92 points93 points  (21 children)

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    They want all men to be themselves to make sure that only the right men get laid. This even extends from mothers to their sons.

    [–]grateday 87 points88 points  (19 children)

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    This is right. Women hate the idea that there is a formula in which they can be caught. That's why they HATE PUAs but at the same time are only interested in men with game.

    [–]thecajunone 75 points76 points  (4 children)

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    They want real alpha cock, not pretend alpha cock, game fucks with their natural instincts.

    [–][deleted]  (3 children)

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    [deleted]

      [–]iKill_eu 35 points36 points  (0 children)

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      but that's different, see

      [–]Aaron565 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

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      ∆ redpill is not fair. Sometimes I am just stunned in my chair at the ridiculousness of it all and realize that if people cant understand how ridiculous this all is, then humanity as a whole is probably doomed.

      [–]dongpal -1 points0 points  (13 children)

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      Does the things PUA do even really work?

      [–]1KyfhoMyoba 21 points22 points  (5 children)

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      Yes.

      [–]colovick 4 points5 points  (3 children)

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      Yes, but once you have the girl you have to know how to keep them... PUA only know how to get girls home... They can't manage anything past that because they aren't high smv, they just imitate

      [–]LordXerces 7 points8 points  (0 children)

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      Which is where TRP picks up.

      [–]Aaron565 1 point2 points  (1 child)

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      But if you do get enough girls, you eventually become a natural.

      You really can fake it until you make it.

      [–]colovick 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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      There's more than one way to skin a cat and more than one reason to...

      [–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

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      Yes but once you are with a woman you got with PUA techniques for any amount of time, the facade wears off.

      [–]Noolaw 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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      Think of PUA as technical analysis and GAME as fundamental analysis.

      [–]RoulantG 3 points4 points  (0 children)

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      short term gains

      And everyone knows long term gains > short term gains.

      [–]Numeromancer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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      I don't think that this kind of Machiavellian über-game comes into it at all. Being a woman, her response is going to be based almost exclusively on her feelings, and her feelings won't allow her to see her son as a potential mate. She can't change her feelings, and her feelings won't let her change her point of view. This is why woman generally are not adept at hypothesis. Her feelings are nurturing feelings, and that's the kind of answer she gave: “You're wonderful as you are, little one, don't worry about anything.”

      [–]2 Endorsed ContributorFLFTW16 51 points52 points  (1 child)

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      I fell for this bullshit for YEARS and YEARS before I realized on my own that women are full of shit. They don't know the first thing about being a man. They can only see the world through their experience as a woman. In general a woman can just wait around being herself and some man will eventually show up and try to initiate something. In their mind they don't even realize that the man searched for her, then initiated a courtship ritual. They just look at their own experience which involved waiting around and being their own self. Then they pass this female-centric advice on to anyone male or female.

      [–]1johnnight 16 points17 points  (0 children)

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      It's more this than "make sure that only the right men get laid."

      She was JBY, when one day dad showed up and initiated. That's all the advice she can give. It worked for her, didn't it?

      Furthermore JBY means something important: "do not look fake/desperate".

      [–]monsieurhire2 14 points15 points  (0 children)

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      You guys are LIARS! JBY is great advice! That's how I attracted Angelina Jolie.

      -Brad Pitt.

      [–]Endorsed ContributorRedSunBlue 24 points25 points  (1 child)

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      They always forget the first part of "Just be yourself" is "Make yourself attractive".

      [–]2 Mredpillschool 18 points19 points  (0 children)

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      Step 1. Become hot, step 2, be yourself. They always leave out step 1. No wonder why everybody's confused.

      [–]Gorgonzola54 11 points12 points  (0 children)

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      The reason women say 'Just be yourself!' is so that they can cut out the deceivers.

      [–]ProfessorCordonnier 11 points12 points  (0 children)

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      Just be yourself... the strongest, most confident, most successful, best dressed version of yourself.

      [–]16 Endorsed ContributorGayLubeOil 44 points45 points  (1 child)

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      Hey Mom?

      Yes Honey?

      I want to stick my 16 year old penis into silly cheerleaders can you help me?

      Fuck. Sex and the City is on in 10. I just want to relax. I don't want to deal with this little shit. Just be yourself honey.

      But dad said that fish dont know how to fish.

      Just be your self sweety.

      Dad said you would say that.

      Just be yourself honey.

      Ok Mom.

      Thank God. I dont have to deal with both shits at once. Crisis averted. Now Ill just pop some Xanex watch Sex in the City and masturbate to what I think GayLubeOil looks like.

      [–]christiefrontdrive 2 points3 points  (0 children)

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      I picture you looking like a handsomer, lubed-up Aleksandr Karelin.

      [–]watersign 6 points7 points  (0 children)

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      Yeah, it seems like every woman has this piece of advice for their son.

      [–]Senrosk 12 points13 points  (0 children)

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      Can confirm this. I just asked my little brother, 14, to ask my mother the same. Got the exact response.

      [–]Endorsed Contributorleftajar 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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      "Just be yourself" is powertalk -- it prevents guys from attempting the beta-to-alpha transition. Quick edit: women prefer it when guys are obviously beta. They HATE WITH A PASSION when a guy is in the "fake it 'til you make it" stage; there's a chance they can be fooled into thinking he's an alpha.

      JBY is brilliant, because it can be aggressively backed up with femlogic if a guy attempts to question it.

      If "yourself" was good enough, why improve? JBY keeps the betas beta.

      [–]Theophagist 7 points8 points  (13 children)

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      "Be yourself." Why is it that TRP is the only community who understands how worthless that statement is?

      [–]1 Endorsed Contributorjsl2837 12 points13 points  (2 children)

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      It can be pitiless in addition to worthless.

      It permits the giver of that advice to shift the goalposts endlessly.

      I.e. If you get rejected, it is because you failed to "be yourself" to a sufficient degree.

      It also enables the giver of that advice to let a man down gently. It can be a tool of conflict avoidance too.

      I.e. You are NOT a loser. Your true self IS attractive. You just need to PRESENT it properly.

      JBY has probably been around since language was invented; it's so versatile.

      [–]Theophagist 2 points3 points  (1 child)

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      You just need to PRESENT it properly.

      To which I could only respond, "OK then, I'm going to be a bunch of people and you tell me when I'm myself." Be yourself, to me, really means "be who I think you should be."

      [–]Dreamtrain 5 points6 points  (3 children)

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      One of the reasons I'd like to have children is so I can prevent this same story from repeating.

      [–]frazzleddd 4 points5 points  (2 children)

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      But by not having them you prevent it from being repeated

      [–]qemist 5 points6 points  (0 children)

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      I think Dreamtrain isn't satisfied with just not propagating the JBY meme. He wants to promote an alternative one.

      [–]harkrank 2 points3 points  (0 children)

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      No, because the woman will have children with another man if he doesn't impregnate her.

      [–]Omaestre 6 points7 points  (4 children)

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      Just be yourself is probably the vaguest form of advice that has ever been uttered.

      [–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

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      I wish I'd had had a father like you. My kids are gonna pull so much pussy one day, it's gonna be unreal.

      [–][deleted]  (2 children)

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          [–]3 Endorsed ContributorSkorchZang 7 points8 points  (0 children)

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          Two men talking in the corridor:

          A: OK here goes the big joke. Why do women fake orgasms so much?

          B: You tell me.

          A: They think we actually care.

          [–]Hlewagastiz 1 point2 points  (1 child)

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          There's this girl I know who sporadically expressed RP ideas over a long period of time, I decided to put her to the test to see if she was one of us , and so I gave her the scenario: Let's say a guy comes up to you , he's not doing well with the ladies, and he asks for your help, what advice would you give him ? Her reply was "JBY", so she obviously hasn't swallowed yet . It's a good way to test whether someone is BP or RP

          [–]GoatwithHorns -1 points0 points  (0 children)

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          I agree 100%. I had been recovering from a oneitis with a girl and gradually put her down from her pedestal. Of course I asked this very same question as in what advice she could give to me when it came to succeeding with other women. JBY. Fucking priceless.

          This woman in question prided herself of being a compassionate woman and a 'true' feminist and humanist. Liking the honesty of male company more than girls. Women gonna women.

          [–]raouldukeesq 1 point2 points  (4 children)

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          So what is the alternative advice? Be a poser? Pretend to be someone you are not? The mom's advice is not mutually exclusive to the son trying to be a better person. Should she tell him to hit the gym and make lots of money? Or is this advice too obvious?

          "Sure mom but let me ask you this: Do you think a fisherman should ask one of the fish how to catch them?" This is an idiotic analogy. Of course the fisherman would ask fish this question if he could. The intelligence would be invaluable. The point is that the fisherman would not take the advice at face value and would need to interpret the information. It's like asking an opposing poker questions to get useful information.

          [–]zpatriarchy 2 points3 points  (3 children)

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          the alternative advice is "become the man that girls find attractive" pay attention to the types of men that girls are attracted to & become more like those guys.

          get in shape, look good, have interests & hobbies, a good job. if you do those things you will become confident because you have reasons to be confident. you won't be desperate. it's not an act. you are not pretending.

          "be yourself" means don't change. the kid is asking because "being himself" is not working. he is "being himself" all the time. he can't NOT "be himself." so it's bad advice.

          [–]BluepillProfessor[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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          This!

          [–]JungleMuffin -2 points-1 points  (1 child)

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          the alternative advice is "become the man that girls find attractive"

          Which is men that are confident and secure in who they are, not insecure wimps who think they need to be someone else or act like someone else to be attractive.

          [–]zpatriarchy 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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          you didn't read my 2nd or 3rd paragraphs. you have to improve yourself in order to have concrete reasons for being confident & secure.

          girls won't sleep with you no matter how confident & secure you are in being a smelly obese comic book geek who works at mcdonalds.

          & the only one talking about "pretending" is you. stop pretending, stop acting. that's why you are still having trouble with girls.

          [–]ARealLifeWizard 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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          My mom said the same damn shit to me when I was a teenager/young adult, she was a cheerleader/sorority girl, she has no clue. I believed it too.

          "Just be yourself, someone right for you will come along, you're a catch." No, I'm not a catch, not yet. Right now I'm a loser with a lot of fucking self improvement and catching up to do, thanks.

          You know, I can't shift the blame off myself, but my father was a green beret in the Vietnam war. Apparently, he was amazing with the ladies and made my mom tingle more than her current husband (she's in her 60s and doesn't hold back anymore). Thanks for not passing the knowledge along and then disappearing when I was 17, dad.

          [–]www777com 1 point2 points  (1 child)

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          I think just be yourself is great advice in the right context. If she's clearly in the wrong during an argument but you still say you're sorry, are you being yourself? When you hold the door open for some hot chick and it takes a little bit of time for her to pass through it walking at a normal pace, is it because you're being yourself? Would you do the same thing for a man? Or did you do it because she's hot or because you were raised to do that? Say you go on a date and it doesn't go as you planned. If you get upset and flustered, are you being yourself? Or are you just trying really hard to impress her and it's failing? Let's say your plans go to hell but you don't care because the only thing you care about is going out and having fun and proceed to figure out some other adventure you two can get into; are you being yourself then? When you get really nervous around a woman you're really attracted to, are you being yourself? What if she were a man you have absolutely no sexual interest in whatsoever, would you be nervous then? Would you consider this scenario as being more yourself than the one before that?

          In the right context, I think it's great advice. If you take it in the context of continuing to do what you've always done, then it's horrible advice.

          [–]ReighIB -1 points0 points  (0 children)

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          In the right context, I think it's great advice. If you take it in the context of continuing to do what you've always done, then it's horrible advice.

          Agreed. It's not a bad advice but imo not a great one either. "Just be yourself" is kind of a lazy answer to give to people. Way too many possible interpretations; gotta specify, especially if you're giving this advice to your kids.

          [–]1gerwig -1 points0 points  (2 children)

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          When people say "be yourself" it means be the way you normally act in a setting where you are comfortable the people there. So it could be good advice for some people. If you were able to treat a girl like a guy you were friends with you'd likely be successful. But the phrase has lost meaning and is not specific enough.

          [–]2 Mredpillschool 9 points10 points  (1 child)

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          It's similar to saying "hey just pass that test..." to somebody who doesn't even know what to study.

          [–]BluepillProfessor[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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          That summarizes my problem with this advice. We are not educating our boys on the ways of women and the women are actively lying to them.

          TRP is the cheat sheet for that test.

          [–]Chronostimeless 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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          The right advice may be "just be awesome!"

          [–]richardnorth 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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          Yes. It's on old tenet of the Red Pill that women's advice on how to pick up women is completely worthless.

          JBY also stems from the fact that JBY WORKS FOR WOMEN (i.e. for women who want to attract men). So, by their solipsistic nature, they spread that idea as advice.

          Part of it stems from the fact that many women never have to pursue men so they are utterly clueless to what it's like to be the "pursuer" and to have to "figure out the game" (for lack of a better expression).

          [–]bigbuzd1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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          Is the mom really going to tell her son, "well, I was first attracted to your dads tight pants that showed his ass really well...oh, and that bulge! Then he just came straight out and and said how much fun we'd have in bed...I was just sopping wet at that point. Oh, what were we talking about son?"

          [–]pwrfull 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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          Round of applause of speaking truth to your son!!

          [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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          JBY is fantastic advice once you let that inner asshole out.

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                      [–]jcrpta 1 point2 points  (5 children)

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                      Be yourself, because you're a confident and attractive person

                      80% of men (and I freely include myself in those 80%) are either not particularly attractive, not particularly confident or both. For those men, "just be yourself" will be interpreted to mean "stand quietly in the corner not making any effort to engage anyone of the opposite sex in conversation".

                      It's incredibly difficult to sleep with women when you barely even talk to them in the first place.

                      [–]JungleMuffin -1 points0 points  (4 children)

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                      Can you provide a source on those statistics please?

                      [–]jcrpta 0 points1 point  (3 children)

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                      Don't split hairs.

                      Obviously it's a made up statistic. But - and here's the important point - it doesn't matter if 10% or 90% of men fall into this category. All that matters is that some men fall into this category.

                      It's precisely those men for whom "just be yourself" is appalling advice, and it's precisely those men that /r/theredpill is intended for.

                      [–]JungleMuffin 0 points1 point  (2 children)

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                      No, it is precisely for those men that the advice is absolutely the best thing. They will never be handsome or stunningly attractive, so they just need to accept that and be comfortable with it.

                      If that's the people TRP is intended for, I guess I'll go grab my coat.

                      [–]jcrpta 0 points1 point  (1 child)

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                      Are you seriously telling me that the best advice you can give to a slob who's earning peanuts and hacked off with the world generally shitting on him is "be content with life as a slob earning peanuts who regularly finds life shitting on him from a great height"?

                      Bull. Shit.

                      The best advice you can give to someone in that situation is tough love. He may not like it very much, but sitting on his arse eating snacks and feeling his stomach grow ever larger isn't going to solve anything.

                      The RP advice is to make yourself a better man. And there is ALWAYS room for improvement. Off the top of my head, that can include things like:

                      • Working on personality traits so you move away from passive-aggressive behaviour when you don't get what you want.
                      • Lifting weights and eating well, so you lose fat and gain muscle.
                      • Maybe learning something new so you can earn more money.
                      • Accepting women for what they are and working with that rather than fighting it. They're not some mythical creature whose shit doesn't stink, and putting them on a pedestal by definition means you consider yourself inferior.

                      Improved confidence and less being-shat-upon will come about as a natural consequence of doing all this.

                      [–]JungleMuffin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                      sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                      Are you seriously telling me that the best advice you can give to a slob who's earning peanuts and hacked off with the world generally shitting on him is "be content with life as a slob earning peanuts who regularly finds life shitting on him from a great height"?

                      No, because I'm not a fucking idiot, and anyone that thinks that saying just be yourself is inferring that actually is.

                      Congrats on picking an absolutely excessively strawmanish example though, it makes arguing a lot easier when you attach extremely specific qualifiers, doesn't it.

                      [–]SubtleObserver -1 points0 points  (0 children)

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                      Jesus Christ how many years I clung to the jby advice? I don't even want to now. It got me absolutely no where.

                      [–]hamstercide -5 points-4 points  (4 children)

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                      One piece of RP wisdom concerns not asking women for advice on how to deal with women. Would a fisherman ask the fish how to catch them and expect a straight answer?

                      Don't see why women are precluded from giving good advice. That would be like saying a turncoat or a spy can tell you nothing about your adversary or how he works. My mother's given me plenty of good advice, and not along the "oh, buy her flowers" line, but more about how to protect myself from women and set boundaries. I think the difference might be she actually gives a shit about me and my success, "JBY" is just laziness in terms of advice.

                      [–]StasisNation 4 points5 points  (1 child)

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                      Giving good advice

                      Giving good advice on how to pick up women

                      One of these things does not belong.

                      [–]hamstercide -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

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                      Clearly I meant the latter. Context, dipshit.

                      [–]p3ndulum 0 points1 point  (1 child)

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                      What does a woman know about what it's like to be a man who is trying to attract a woman?

                      [–]hamstercide 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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                      What does a defending soldier know about an attacking force? Women are approached by men all the time in their lifetimes. They should be cognizant of what opens their legs and what doesn't, they've had the experiment done on them endlessly. Also, please refer to the human capacity to put yourself in someone else's shoes. Women aren't non-sentient animals.