First original post (excluding the one deleted by bots early on):
Having read a lot of the stories on here written by new TRP converts, I see a lot of people discussing the difficulty of swallowing the Red Pill. After all, it is a lot of new information to take on at once. Get fit, dress better, talk to women, stop pedestaling, stop supplicating, don’t take shit, make eye contact, have confidence, have a sense of self-worth, be the captain of your own ship, stop blaming others, own your actions, keep your word, stop flaking, be an alpha, and so on.
I don’t know about you, but every single one of those things is the opposite of what I was doing before. That is a lot to change about oneself in a single sitting. You’re goddamn right its overwhelming. But let’s be honest, IT IS THE MOST FUCKING FUN THING IN THE WHOLE WORLD TO BE RAD. Getting there kind of sucks, takes work, but those of you who are also rad know what I am talking about.
Once I decided to get started, it was easy to go full beast-mode alpha, and the journey from total pussy to totally gnarly only took about 18 months. Why? There are several reasons: 1) I was flying solo, and focused on me first; 2) if I didn’t start giving a shit about me, I was going to die; 3) there wasn’t anyone else that was going to help me besides me.
By far the biggest factor was flying solo. I was afraid of undoing all of my hard work by approaching women before I had arrived at my confident self. I lifted 5 days a week, two hours a day. I work about 60 hours a week in a law firm, so if I can find the time you can too. I dropped 60lbs in 6 months. People started noticing, an even mix of cheerleaders and haters. Cheerleaders say good for you, keep working hard, you look great. Haters gon’ hate. Fuck haters, jealousy is a motherfucker. But that is their problem, not yours. You are too fucking awesome to even respond to that negativity.
Also, get a hobby that is not related to athletics. A man should have many skills. If you like to work with wood, learn some carpentry. If you like music, learn an instrument or how to produce music or mix or sound engineer. Be creative and put yourself into your work. Be proud of it. Haters are going to try to fuck you up on this one. You aren’t doing it for anyone but you, so if you like your work- mission accomplished.
When I finally got to where flying solo was my default mode, I began to see my time as precious. I was approached by women, and did some approaching myself. But most people aren’t worth my time. It is better spent lifting, learning, working, hanging out with my folks or buds, or practicing my hobby. That is my list of priorities. If a women wants my time, she has to show me why she should come before any of those things. If she is not able to demonstrate that she should be a priority, then I decline to spend my precious time with her. But I am always nice, polite, and constructive about ending it – even when they aren’t.
When you are your own man, can meet your needs, are capable of hard work, and take pride in yourself you do not need company. You do not need a companion. You may want one, but you will intuitively want one that is worth the time and effort. Suddenly red-flags are not ignored, suddenly if you aren’t having fun on a date, you don’t need to go on a second one. Best of all, if being solo is default, a breakup is just a return to status quo. The after effects become almost unnoticeable.
Don’t hate women. Don’t call them irrational. Don’t call them fat or ugly. Hold yourself to a higher fucking standard than that, man. Get some fucking Zen. Women are different from men, and that’s totally cool. They have good ideas, they work hard, they bear children, they are capable of all kinds of other rad shit I can’t do. Society has largely failed women, but it has fucking failed men too (albeit in different ways). Don’t bring yourself up by kicking others down. That’s bully shit. Try to leave as little carnage in your wake as possible. If you decide that a woman isn’t right for you, part ways in a way that doesn’t do more harm. Dan Savage has a good rule lifted from the boy scouts: leave it in better shape than you found it. Remember that some dude will get with her after, and we don’t want to make it any harder on a bro than it already is. Maybe your last act with her will be the reason she is better to the next guy.
And while you’re at it, learn about some feminist concerns. I am not saying you have to be a feminist. You don’t even have to agree. But if you disagree, it should be because you listened to all sides and formed an educated opinion. You should not disagree based on knee-jerk bullshit and anecdotal evidence that this one time this one chick did this one thing and it sucked.
Remember: lots of people hate the redpill because they fail to sift through the misogynistic bullshit (which there is some) and look for the good parts about self-improvement and personal value. Guess what?! That goes the other way too. Females have some valid points about lack of societal progress, just like men do. If you shoot it all down as bullshit after only reading or hearing the most extreme viewpoints, you are part of the problem. Educate yourself, brah.
And while we are on the subject, don’t hate blue pills/white knights. Sure, they might be acting like idiots. But they don’t know it, and probably think that they are in the right. I can’t say for certain that they aren’t, at least in certain instances. Men need to be bringing each other up. We need to look out for ourselves, but also for our fellow bros (enlightened or not). Again, hold yourself to a higher standard. It’s on you to do the right thing. The true measure of a man is how he conducts himself when no one is watching.
Actually, don’t hate period. It’s a waste of your fucking time. And you don’t have much time on Planet Erf to be wasting it on petty bullshit.
TL:DR: If an option, try stepping away from women for a while to get your life in order. When you re-enter the dating scene as a fully formed, bad-ass MAN the confidence will take care of itself. Hold yourself to a high standard, and treat others with kindness. Put good out there, and it comes back. Don’t take shit, and ignore haters.