all 138 comments

[–]1wall-of-meth 51 points52 points  (17 children)

Body posture is non-verbal frame. It is an action you do and as we know actions speak louder than words. Improving body posture will make people treat you with respect the second they see you, without commanding it. They simply know better than to fuck with you, since your imposing chest tells them everything needed.

I am not a fan of the hands behind your back thing. It puts your hands out of sight and you could do whatever without people noticing it. When I stand still, I rather lean to one side, hands in my pockets - people can still see what you do with your hands - , straight upper body and chin up.

Another thing that can help you check your posture: Imagine looking at yourself in an aerial view from straight above. Ideally, only your head and shoulders (add the circumference of your ribcage to that) should be visible since the rest is straightened up and you don't slouch.

What comes with that is, you automatically take up more space. This comes in handy in two aspects:

  • Strangers will respect your territory and are less likely to take your space. You show so much presence, they are intimidated at first impression and thus notice you. Standing, sitting, walking, whatever you are doing, people will avoid colliding with your personal space. Your body language claims it as your own space and people see that.

  • Physical contact will become bread and butter if it isn't to you yet. You actually provoke physical contact with such an open body language. Whatever you are doing, when you take your space doing it, you will end up engaging physical contact left and right and everywhere. And that's not even actively engaged physical contact, it is a byproduct. Add actively engaged contact to that, then you have a powerful tool of building deep trust. Of course, people will mirror your behaviour, which makes it double rewarding.

Watch your posture. It's part of your frame and frame is to be held.

[–]kuayi 12 points13 points  (7 children)

Nicely put. I used to be a personal trainer and having good form in the gym will translate when you walk down the street.

Squeeze shoulder blades back a bit like you're doing half a row. This is key as girls are attracted to back muscles.

Keep chin back so there is no curve in your cervical vertebrae.

Keep core tight.

Watch every other girl turn their heads.

Crossing hands behind your back is just silly and I can only see foreigners doing it. It makes you un-relatable.

[–]CloakedOrchid 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Squeeze shoulder blades back a bit like you're doing half a row. This is key as girls are attracted to back muscles.

If anyone has any doubts about this, try it while halfway looking back into a mirror. It only feels weird because you've been standing like an asshole your whole life; pull back your shoulders just a little bit and your back will square out and look MUCH more full.

[–]krystyin 2 points3 points  (4 children)

I just did all that and thought "this would be so much easier to do if my muscles were tight from the gym" - going 1st thing and working back.

[–]kuayi 4 points5 points  (3 children)

Work your posterior delts on days you do back if you don't already know. Gives you a unique attractive frame that most people can't really put their fingers on. Most guys neglect the posterior delts with overdeveloped anterior delts from too much benching.

[–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (1 child)

Recommend some lifts or exercises?

[–]kuayi 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Rear delt raises on hyperextension. Keep torso parallel to ground. Use 5lbs for now to learn isolation. Keep back squeezed (shoulders locked position) to create an isolated movement without using back muscles.

Rear delt raises via criss-crossing cables lowered to the ground. Stand in a position like you're doing a standing barbell row or like the initial deadlift position - back straight, bend at hips not knees.

High rows via tricep rope attachment. Again, keep shoulders locked cuz you're not working your back here.

In all these exercises, use very low weight like 0-10lbs to practice isolation (since it's a rarely used muscle) and prevent rotator cuff injury. Also, always keep your elbows shoulder level, never lower, don't cheat.

[–]humankin 5 points6 points  (2 children)

Body posture is non-verbal frame.

This bears mention: frame is not communication. Calling body posture "non-verbal frame" is so wrong that it's not-even-wrong. Frame is framework is perspective. It's how you react to phenomena both external and internal to yourself. Weak or non-present frame means a person's way of choosing is easily edited by the people around them, making them a vessel for others' will. Those with strong frame do not easily have their will tainted and especially not outright rewritten.

I get why you use that phrasing even knowing all of this but better that newfags don't spout rubbish because they can't read behind your rhetoric.


That's the negative. The rest of your comment is excellent. Especially mentioning "open body language" since that's part of what OP's doing with how he holds his arms but he doesn't mention this. Holding arms in front of ones chest is defensive because it's closed body language. It's saying "leave me alone", which a person doesn't say neutrally or offensively.

[–]LittleCrazee 0 points1 point  (1 child)

I suppose I should not have said that I disagree with his first point. Just that in certain circumstances, I would maintain that it doesn't matter how strong your frame is. Due to social conditioning regarding certain activities, people will not always react as you might expect. Was just putting forth a slice of personal experience and not looking to shit on the posters comment in general.

[–]humankin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Did you post on the wrong account?

[–]russianwarrier 72 points73 points  (34 children)

Or that girl watches your facebook. But yes ive been working alot on posture and just did some groceries (crowded as fuck) and ppl appologize for barely touching me. Didnt happen when i had that auswitsch gamer physique

[–][deleted]  (17 children)

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    [–]BetterThanHugh 27 points28 points  (16 children)

    what is this subs problem with smiling? If you gotta nice smile you should be smiling at everyone you see. Quit being mopey ass bitches.

    [–][deleted]  (2 children)

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      [–]Endorsed ContributorRedBigMan 5 points6 points  (0 children)

      Exactly... your laughs or smiles should be genuine rather than fake and forced.

      This is why betas are disliked by women because they're always forcing a smile or laughter and most betas aren't very good actors.

      [–]Achaidas 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      The group of people I work with make a point of not smiling until you've earned it - we're an entrepreneurial consulting group so we often have men or women come through that have never been taken serious nor taken an endeavor, like their own start-up, serious.

      The principle behind the teaching is to convey weight to the situation (The desire to move forward in a business startup) as well as yourself and have the person "earn" the ability to see you joke around or smile.

      Makes sense.

      [–][deleted] 14 points15 points  (6 children)

      You should know better. Smiling all the time is seeking rapport with people because you aren't confident with yourself. Maybe not in all cases but it's definitely can be a submissive and rapport seeking behavior.

      [–]BetterThanHugh 8 points9 points  (4 children)

      This where a lot of RP is way off. You don't have to be some "alpha-bot" to wheel chicks. Look around you, guys who get girls are usually fun-loving goofballs. Suppressing your humanity is not attractive. Smile.

      [–]vaporfarts 15 points16 points  (0 children)

      TRP isn't just about getting women. It's also about improving your interactions with people you're not seeking sex from. Address each situation appropriately

      [–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

      I've known some goofballs. They aren't attractive to women. Being humorous is not being a goofball. Stick to being funny rather than looking like you're high on Xanax all the time. No one is saying to never smile. The point is don't blatantly mask your insecurity by seeking rapport with everyone. Take yourself seriously.

      [–]23490865243879526487 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      Suppressing your humanity is not attractive. Smile.

      The more often you do it the less special it becomes.

      [–]__ROOSTER__ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      "Goof balls" rarely have success. I have no idea in what world you see them do.

      [–]Amorevolous 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      I find that if it's natural for you to smile all the time, it can be used to your advantage because if you can turn it off early, doing so can be a great tool for letting people know how serious you are about something.

      [–]ShagggyDog 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      Smile is a powerful tool. If you smile all the time, it becomes your normal face for everyone and you can't use it when you need it. Then you need to use words instead, and we all know words can be expensive! You make your smile precious to people by making it rare.

      [–]boney_hoo_hoo 1 point2 points  (1 child)

      If you got great teeth, show them off!

      [–]Acx3 -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

      Smiling is implicitly recognized as a sign of submission.

      [–]Entrefut -1 points0 points  (0 children)

      Because I have smiling all the time. If I want to smile I smile. Having a stern look on my face is actually very comfortable. The fact that it makes other people uncomfortable isn't really my problem. But when I do laugh of smile, I feel the increased sincerity.

      [–]I_HaveAHat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Move to canada, people apologize when I bump into them

      [–][deleted]  (7 children)

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        [–][deleted]  (2 children)

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          [–]Endorsed ContributorRedBigMan 0 points1 point  (1 child)

          Depends on the games too...

          There's a lot of people who went from overweight to normal when the Wii came out with it's motion action game sorta stuff.

          [–]vzhu 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          Yeah, those zumba classes really payed off.

          [–]punis1 4 points5 points  (2 children)

          Generalizations don't have to apply to yourself to be true, learn to reason.

          [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

          Actually, it's not just me. Gaming has become a multi billion dollar industry with consumers of all kinds. The image of the overweight, neckbearded, basement-dwelling gamer is a generalization. Now i know you all love to generalize on this subreddit, but in this case, it's just not correct. So you might want to get your outdated views checked and get back in sync with the world.

          [–]switchme808 2 points3 points  (0 children)

          Yes, everyone and their mothers and grandmothers plays some sort of game, be it xbox, facebook, mobile, or whatever.

          However, we are not talking about the general population of people who play games, we are talking specifically about people who self identity as "gamers", AKA the same people who spend their time on gaming forums or going to gaming conventions and so on. The stereotypes of "skinny nerd" and "overweight neckbeard" apply far more often than not among this group.

          That being said, of course it's not a defining characteristic, but it's still a valid stereotype.

          [–]hwrdprkns -1 points0 points  (0 children)

          lol Auschwitz is in Poland

          [–]A-Red-Six 14 points15 points  (4 children)

          Hunter's eyes.

          I don't remember where I first read about this. Probably a post on here.

          You can have the strongest posture in the world, but wide eyes and a goofy look on your face will completely ruin the appearance you're trying to convey.

          Like wearing a novelty tie full of cartoon trout with a crisp, tailored suit.

          Since toning down my facial expressions, and focusing on my strong "eyes on the prize" eye contact, I've noticed a drastic change in the reactions I get from people.

          This can easily come across as creepy if you overdo it, though, so don't just start mad-dogging people. Instead, just focus on relaxing all of your facial muscles, paying special attention to the eyes and eyebrows.

          [–]1Padre55 16 points17 points  (2 children)

          Let the head, lead the eyes, not the eyes lead the head.

          If you ever watch a hunter or predator, you never see the whites, always just the head pointing directly at what they are examining. That removes a lot of the sort of frenetic, herky jerky movement

          Musashi hit on this with "do not let your eyes roam the universe", the idea being focus..focus..focus

          Trick to improve on that is take an object, could be a pen or whatever, start out say arms length away from your nose, then slowly move it inwards what will happen is your eyes will want to blurr and double the object as it moves closer..then move it slowly outwards

          This trains the eyes to focus intensely.

          I've had men and women swear I could see right though them

          [–]KSmittens 2 points3 points  (1 child)

          That's very interesting. Do you mean to say that that eye exercise actually increases muscle control around the eyes and leads to a better focusing ability? Have you been using this exercise yourself? If so have you noticed the benefits? Lastly, do other people really notice the difference in your gaze? It seems like this exercise would be incredibly beneficial for someone in terms of body language and holding frame.

          [–]1Padre55 1 point2 points  (0 children)

          Yes, there is some science behind it, think when an officer does the pen test to see if you eyes oscillate or "tremor"

          Yes, only I was taught to use a stilletto when focusing

          Benefits..massive, maybe it is personal have light blue eyes and coupled with staying still or using your head like a turret and not led by your eyes it is not creepy, it is very very powerful.

          People notice?

          Absolutely, think of this way, in the right situation when talking to someone w/relaxed body language with that intensity, unlike most who are all smiley eyes around the universe, the feeling is..they are focusing on...me..me...me

          I've had men, mostly say it is intimidating (generally) sometimes it leads to threats of violence for just standing there, and women turn into little girls..ask a question and it's "oh..Idooooonnnn't know..."

          Let me add, when one is getting it on and lock eyes with the GiQ..she may cover your eyes because it is not like a switch you turn on and off

          [–]strategos_autokrator 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          I'm very interested in improving my facial expressions, and your post is the closest thing I've found on this. Do you know any other posts or videos on this issue?

          [–]thelandofdreams 13 points14 points  (2 children)

          Walk into a bar. Scan the room until you notice a girl is looking at you. Don't look away, don't look away, don't look away. She looks away. Walk right up to her and gently slap the bar. Open.

          half the work is already done.

          [–]krystyin 12 points13 points  (0 children)

          You will be labeled as one of two types of people at that point. Creeper or Keeper. half the work is already done.

          [–]slappywhyte 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          i like that slapping the bar part

          [–]StephanZAQ 12 points13 points  (2 children)

          I've noticed that lifting has helped my posture naturally without thinking about it. I'm not sure if it's a subconscious thing due to increased confidence or directly related to the strengthening of my lower back.

          [–]jamieoneal82 6 points7 points  (0 children)

          Also, added torso and arm muscle naturally forces you to walk with your arms swinging just slightly away from your body and leg muscles makes your gait just a bit wider.

          [–]Amorevolous 1 point2 points  (0 children)

          It has a lot to do with the fact that when you're lifting, and lifting right, a big focus is on posture and keeping it well formed; not only to benefit your lift but also to help protect yourself from injury. So your body gets used to getting into the right picture due to muscle memory, and this carries into your everyday lift. It's fascinating how good habits in a specific area of your life can carry over and benefit most of the other areas in your life.

          [–]laere 24 points25 points  (17 children)

          What Every BODY Is Saying

          Read this book and other body language books.

          When you walk, walk with your shoulders.

          Take up as much space as possible while sitting or standing.

          Hands on your hips (power pose).

          I avoid things like crossing my arms, hands in my pockets, and never ever have your head hanging low, or looking at the ground. Always keep your chin up slightly, never break eye contact first, etc.

          These things alone have had customers at work assume I was the boss there. It's like magic.

          EDIT: Also when talking, speak slowly, with calmness, and use a deep voice. Don't be afraid to pause before speaking as taking a couple seconds to contemplate on what to say is natural.

          [–]Endless_Summer 25 points26 points  (5 children)

          I'm 6'5" and this is hard. It's a constant reminder in the back of my head to keep posture erect and chin up when dealing with people a foot shorter than me all day long.

          [–]jamieoneal82 12 points13 points  (3 children)

          6'3" here and I know what you mean. The other problem is constantly worrying about hitting your head on something that I think causes tall people to slouch.

          [–][deleted]  (1 child)

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            [–]MojoMoley 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            I have so many bruises on my head from constantly bumping into the ceiling or something. It sucks.

            [–]MacNulty 4 points5 points  (0 children)

            6'4" here. Don't even get me started on standing/listening/talking to a group of people in loud environments...

            [–]GeneralCal 5 points6 points  (0 children)

            100% agree. I learned about the effect posture has on how people and when you know to look for this, it's impossible not to notice, and does seem like magic.

            [–]theycallme1 6 points7 points  (0 children)

            Curious about crossing your arms.. I realize it is a defensive pose, but I happen to have large arms and it's an inadvertent way to draw some attention to them. It can also come off as intimidating, thoughts?

            [–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (1 child)

            Also when talking, speak slowly, with calmness, and use a deep voice. Don't be afraid to pause before speaking as taking a couple seconds to contemplate on what to say is natural.

            Minor point of contention here. I agree that this is the best way to speak but in modern, plugged in culture everyone is taught to speak as quickly and profusely as possible....like a radio personality who doesn't want any airtime and tries to cram as much info into a 60 second time slot as possible.

            What that means as a speaker is if you talk slowly and deliberately, everyone....and I mean god damn everyone will take that space as room to horn in on the narrative (can't have any "dead air") and compromise your dominance of the conversation. Pause before speaking and anything you had to say after that pause will never be spoken. Anything you were trying to think of during that pause will be lost in the noise.

            [–]JoshtheAspie 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            This is something of a prisoner's dilemma in meetings. If one person is constantly talking, refusing to let others break in, and breaking in to what they are saying, collaboration becomes difficult.

            It's particularly infuriating if that person says he wants information, but will not give a pause for others to give that information without seeming rude.

            On the other hand, there are times when someone specifically asks you if you have something to contribute. While I am still attempting to train myself to do so, this seems like the perfect time to use this. Take a moment to compose your thoughts, since you aren't initiating your own speech, then say what you want to say clearly and concisely in a deliberate fashion.

            Conversely, if you are in a leadership position, and attempt to dominate a conversation by talking too much, dial it back. You are attempting to validate yourself to your workers, and cover up weakness.

            Let others contribute. It'll be easier to contribute, and you'll give people more chances to validate to you.

            [–]1Padre55 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            Doing Farmer Carries helps this tremendously, the weight forces good posture, even if you dip your head due to exerction it will pop back up again because the weight is pulling your traps and middle back downwards forcing your head to right itself and look forward.

            Also it trains your walk, when you are used to carrying heavy things long distances that way, when that weight is removed your feet become lighter when when you step

            [–]2 Endorsed Contributorvengefully_yours 14 points15 points  (2 children)

            All things you do in the US military. You are never to have your hands in your pockets, arms behind you is called Parade Rest. When walking your hands are not hanging freely, they are closed in a lose fist. Chest out, chin up, arms swing six inches to the from, four to the rear while walking. Body language is everything when commanding respect. With poor posture and body language you will be demanding respect, and thus not getting it. You take that shit, you don't ask for it.

            [–]TheThingsIThink 4 points5 points  (1 child)

            And pick up your feet when you walk. Dont scuff the soles of your shoes, drop your heel like your crushing skulls.

            [–]2 Endorsed Contributorvengefully_yours 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            That heel beat should be in every step.

            [–]All__fun 14 points15 points  (3 children)

            Keep your head up.

            Learned this from Martial Arts practice. Holding your head high, improves your breathing (Air circulation)

            And that also helps with your appearance. I do everything the same as you,

            BUT

            I try to focus my gaze towards the second or third floors of buildings.

            [–]frequentlywrong 10 points11 points  (1 child)

            Also don't look around like an idiot. Steady gaze in front of you. Walk around with a purpose like you have some place important to be.

            [–]All__fun 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            Exactly,

            Sorry I left that out. Head up and straight forward.

            [–]rpkarma 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            I learnt proper masculine posture through martial arts too. My instructor would hit me with a big stick if my posture was incorrect.

            [–]DetectiveDing-Daaahh 5 points6 points  (3 children)

            This is crucial advice for short guys, too. I'm 5'3" and do most of these things.Even with piss-poor self esteem and minimal confidence, you wouldn't notice it because of the way I carry myself.

            [–]ziggitypumziggitypim 2 points3 points  (2 children)

            What other tips you got for short people like us. I'm the same height.

            [–]massthetics 7 points8 points  (0 children)

            Act like you don't know what short means. Anyone draws attention to it to neg you, just agree/amplify 'yeah legally im a dwarf' etc

            [–]smokingmonkey420 5 points6 points  (0 children)

            You got to have a very strong frame as a short guy. Strong enough to compensate for your lack of height.

            One of the most important things you can do as a short guy is learn how to fight. If you can't, and the big guys can push you around with ease, then they won't respect you. And neither will women.

            However, on the flip side, if you're a small motherfucker and can whoop the big dudes ass, then you got a big mindfuck going on.

            [–]johnnywahd 11 points12 points  (3 children)

            Don't forget about eye contact. It is a powerful tool when used correctly. Also remember to practice your deep voice when speaking. This takes daily practice, but basically speak only when exhaling. It automatically lowers your voice.

            [–]ziggitypumziggitypim 3 points4 points  (2 children)

            Don't we all exhale when speaking. I'm confused.

            [–]SenorPuff 9 points10 points  (0 children)

            Take a deep breath, and talk, but try to use as little air as possible. Should sound kinda choked out. Now do it again, and really just let the air out in as few words as possible. Your voice will sound much lower in comparison. Your 'natural' voice is somewhere in between.

            [–]johnnywahd 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            It's a conscious thing to slow down while you speak. I find that when I exhale I am pushing down with my stomach and it forces more bass in my voice.

            [–]DrakeSaint 6 points7 points  (0 children)

            Out of my head:

            Look people in the eyes when they speak. Also do it when you want to address core parts of your speech. Slightly inclining your body also works.

            Don't hold your head with your hand when someone speaks. It makes you look bored (unless you purposely want to do it).

            The TRP sidewalk walking. Posture up, slightly bump people who don't move out of your way. Slightly push them if they don't comply with moving, while at the same time walking towards your objective. The key is that, at least, they must move as much as you do. Don't do this with elderly or kids.

            [–]lubeoil 6 points7 points  (0 children)

            Thats a not a Ceo. That muthafuckin Superman.

            [–]icouldhavehaditall 8 points9 points  (10 children)

            Walk like you're wearing a cape.

            [–]gensyms 20 points21 points  (7 children)

            Why not actually wear a cape?

            [–]--_-_-_-_-_-_-_-- 15 points16 points  (1 child)

            or wear underwear over your pants... so alpha....

            [–]1AreYouAware_ 2 points3 points  (2 children)

            You can get away with a lot of crazy fashion statements if you just own them and your body language make it clear that you're comfortable with how you appear.

            So yes, try a cape. You'd best make the rest of the outfit match, though.

            [–]2lightfire409 16 points17 points  (1 child)

            Are you high? Don't actually wear a cape guys. You are not a runway model in NYC

            [–]MojoMoley -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

            Is this sub turning into a neckbeard fest or what is happening here?

            [–]Satisfi 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            Keep your head held like you're wearing a crown

            [–]dardanmm 3 points4 points  (5 children)

            I found the cue of doing things "slow" very interesting when I first heard about it. Think about two separate people opening a bottle of water and drinking it - one does it slow/relaxed while the other does it "normal"/fast. The "slow" one seems more relaxed / in control

            [–]Djmeansdjk 1 point2 points  (2 children)

            Nice point. I take it a step further and don't move at all, unless necessary.

            Around this time last year, I was at a party, chilling, and this girl (8-9) started brushing her foot against my leg under the table. As soon as I started to get hard, I got nervous and my leg started to shake. Killed the attraction quicker than I built it.

            [–]dardanmm 2 points3 points  (0 children)

            Yeah, leaving out unnecessary movements is one of the biggest things I've learned

            [–]1cover20 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            If she was sitting next to you, you could have put your hand on her inner thigh after a while and pulled it toward you.

            If she was across the table, I guess you just have to ignore it physically (take deep breaths if necessary) while planning how to respond to this IOI.

            [–]slappywhyte 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            regardless of what you think of WWE wrestling -- if you watch some of the top guys (Randy Orton as example) they are often very deliberate and slow in their body language and actions -- and they can have the crowd in the palm of their hands with just a little movement

            [–]Johnny10toes 2 points3 points  (2 children)

            How to sit when at a barstool chair. I try to remind myself not to cross my feet to the point of keeping them out but a barstool chair it forces you keep them under you.

            [–]DakotaTRP 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            Put your feet on the stools next to you if you can.

            [–]jamesez501 2 points3 points  (1 child)

            I post this everywhere on here, I REALLY recommend you read "What Every Body Is Saying" by Joseph Navarro. Excellent read, changed the way I position myself subconsciously AND situationally, plus it really gives you an advantage by helping you recognize everything going through the other person's head by scanning them toe to head (yes inverse purposely from a strategic standpoint). Get his book!

            [–]2emptyform 1 point2 points  (1 child)

            Breathe deeply and slowly, and never appear to be in a hurry.

            [–]krystyin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            I will add to that - never appear to be in a hurry instead act like you have your day planned and walk to places like you have a purpose. People loafing, walking without purpose, etc look beta - You will never see the CFO meandering - they got work to do.

            [–]weirdinternetstalker 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            I use to fidget, while I was sitting I would bounce my leg up and down with the ball of my foot. A girl I was on a date with actually put her hand on my leg to stop me from doing it.... Sometimes you have to learn the hard way. Ever since then I police myself and don't fidget.

            [–]RedArgonaut 1 point2 points  (3 children)

            Anyone have tips for getting this body language without doing it consciously? I don't want to be fucking sitting there, worrying about how other people perceive me, so that I appear alpha.

            [–]SwagYoloJesus 2 points3 points  (0 children)

            Fake it til you make it. After a while, it will become natural.

            [–]punis1 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            Do you think about breathing or is it unconscious? Do you think about chewing or is it unconscious? Is most of your driving in conscious or automatic mode?

            As with everything in life, if you practice it enough it will be second nature to you and it will come naturally.

            [–]NerieHaze 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            Can you recommend books on posture, and how to keep an strong body language?

            [–]pi-py-pie 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            I agree on all, but one. Crossing your arms is not a defensive posture - it is a closed-off and authoritative posture. Maybe I'm a little biased, being a former marine and the 'ceo posture' with crossed arms is the de facto position for a drill instructor. Defensive is not an adjective for a drill instructor. Crossing your arms and leaning back in your chair, or standing very tall with neck long, dick and chest forward, in my experience is the most profound posture to induce frame compliance. People are made very uncomfortable and frantically attempt to win you over and open you up. At least in my experience.

            [–]1 Endorsed Contributorjsl2837 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            Weightlifters are a good example:

            http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Fud3fXvLf5E&list=UU6Szg3KZDRfXtqZREBYYQSA

            See, even if you're fat, you can still carry yourself well and exude strength rather than slovenliness.

            Shoulders down, breathe into belly, show off your nipples.

            Feelings: Calm, balanced, harmonious, flow, with a dash of playful cockiness.

            [–]TheWSTensai 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            Body language is one of the best things to work on, regardless if you are 7 months or a few days into TRP.

            Your best bet for really hammering proper body language down is to go a week where your main focus is body language. Type "Body Language" in to the TRP search bar and read everything you can. Then apply it to your life. It's hard to constantly remind yourself to use proper posture, but from my experience if you can do so for at least a week straight. It'll start to become natural.

            [–]dancingwithcats 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            Those are all good and well proven, old tips really. Add to that how you speak. Speak softly but clearly, and slowly. Do not speak too quickly, and by keeping your volume low people will focus more on what you are saying. Speaking loud and fast will not convey any air of leadership.

            A combination of speech and body: when you're on a conference call, stand up and walk around your office. You will actually sound more authoritative.

            More on body language: look people in the eye when you talk to them. When speaking to a group, make sure to let your gaze wander from person to person. That makes them all feel included and also conveys a greater sense of leadership.

            [–]kuayi 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            Don't cross your hands behind your back. You'll look too pompous and un-relatable.

            [–]draketton 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            I always got made fun of for hands behind back

            Hands aligned with thighs with slight swing commands a lot more respect

            [–]Hymen-Ripper 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            Put your thumbs in your back pocket. This will make you realize what your posture should be like all the time. It will naturally pull your shoulders back and down.

            Also, don't neglect your back in the gym. Stop benching so much and make sure you get in lots of pull ups and rows.

            [–]tb12rm 0 points1 point  (3 children)

            I have a habit of doing this as well. I'm in highschool (yes I know that admitting that is suicide here) and I had a kid say "I'm sorry, sir," to me when I bumped him in the hall.

            [–]Throw59 10 points11 points  (2 children)

            Why would admitting you're in high school be suicide here? You can use redpill just like any other aged male and we're all happy to help.

            [–]coogzzz 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            I think he means on reddit in general

            [–]bgat79 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            I suppose putting your hands behind your back could be interpreted as im not afraid of you. In the military its called parade rest and its so when "higher ups" come to inspect you / talk to you youre non threatening and they have the opportunity to freely choke slam you if youre all fucked up.

            [–]sajnt -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

            I think that this is outrageous! Girl Power!!!!!!!!!!! <333333333333333333333333333