all 170 comments

[–]dudesyouknowme 155 points156 points  (30 children)

That's why I am here. My dad is a nice guy and was physically present but he is beta bucks all the way.

[–]UTBeneVOLence 30 points31 points  (6 children)

Just literally discovered this sub reddit.. I have suffered anxiety for more of my life just really getting over it with therapy now (age 26)

I realised that my mum who has always been like it taught me that the world isn't a safe place and coddled me throughout my childhood, there was nothing my dad could do, probably because he didn't see the harm it... Realising you are like this is one of the most important steps to changing it and honestly after starting learning game and working out more I feel like my eyes have been opened to world I didn't know existed!!

[–]FinnianWhitefir 14 points15 points  (1 child)

Sounds similar, though I did that at 36. There's a real interesting idea that helped me, where the role of mothers is to coddle and comfort you and provide you a safe place to be. And fathers are supposed to help usher you out into the world, show you that it's safe to leave the comfortable place of your mother, and that it's okay to go take risks in the "real world".

I can absolutely see in my life a drive to "Don't go out there, it's too scary and risky". And it's taken a lot of work to basically become my own parent and take care of myself when I was stepping outside of my comfort zone and getting out into the world.

Best of luck with it.

[–]BloodRoseTRP 3 points4 points  (0 children)

the role of mothers is to coddle and comfort you and provide you a safe place to be. And fathers are supposed to help usher you out into the world, show you that it's safe to leave the comfortable place of your mother

I agree with this sentiment, and it is for this reason that children raised by single mothers tend to be pushovers. The children learn from an early age to be coddled and passive. Add this to the fact that your typical single mother can be very emotionally abusive, and you've got a recipe for a blue pill upbringing.

[–]CornyHoosier 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Welcome! This is a place for men. Where we can be blunt, crass and drop ideas or situations off of each other. Taking the red pill is a learning process, so don't get to agitated with yourself when you stumble.

[–]teeelo 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You may find with a few good servings of Red Pill truth you will no longer need your therapy and throw away your pills. (If you take them)

[–]fortifiedoranges 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Welcome, how did you stumble across us?

[–]UTBeneVOLence 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks! I was searching for a specific post in Seddut and forgot to click 'search this subreddit only' there was a post from this sub!

[–]JustSoha 46 points47 points  (5 children)

me too.. it's sad to say that but my father was a good guy and my mom dominance overcome him.

[–]theonlymikeonreddit 25 points26 points  (4 children)

I never even met my dad. I have a serious lack of positive role models in my life. I want to be somebody's role model.

[–]JerkyMcGee 15 points16 points  (3 children)

That is EXACTLY how I feel. My dad passed away when I was little. I want to have a baby boy one day to show and teach him the world.

[–]theonlymikeonreddit 4 points5 points  (2 children)

With what I do I come into contact with guys a little bit younger than myself, and I try to display what a strong red pill man, this sub has changed me over the last year. I don't want kids anymore, but my main mantra is that we create our own happiness, we don't need validation from females, we are capable of anything, and positive is the only way to be. Redpill truths are difficult to show to most, so I just start with those principles.

[–]self_made_guy 1 point2 points  (1 child)

Since I discovered MGTOW and the RP, i have been reading alot of us don't want kids anymore.

The fact of the matter is : A red pill father will more likely raise a red pill son. I agree 100% with JerkyMcGee. I too want to have kids ( sons). Teaching them " how to live life for dummies", introduce them to fitness, philosophy and game will give me a satisfaction that no woman will ever be able to give me.

That has been my calling for years. I want to die with a smile on my face saying : " I did it ! I can die in peace now. "

[–]theonlymikeonreddit 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Honestly, it is not that I don't want kids, its that I don't want kids with a woman. That may change if I ever find a real life unicorn, but I won't hold my breath. My goals are to visit every continent, own my own home, and continue in my career as a freelance. Kids just aren't in my priority. I will never get married, and I want to get vasigel when treatment starts next year. I think what will likely happen one day is I will adopt.

[–]zpatriarchy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i said this same thing a few months ago about my dad & got downvoted & some dudes got butthurt because they were dads. learning this stuff online like we did is not how it should be.

[–]sozzZ 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yea I feel exactly the same way. I don't want to go into it too much but as a result of his decline my mother got a divorce recently, even though they still live together. Like OP I want to be the exact opposite of him when I grow up in some sense. But it's hard and I see a lot of parallels between his behavior and mine.

[–]Temptationn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My parents where divorced since I was 2 and I seen my dad once a month. Everything I know I've taught myself being my mom wasn't really there for me either. which lead me here

[–][deleted]  (10 children)

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    [–][deleted]  (2 children)

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      [–]itsemalkay 2 points3 points  (1 child)

      Do you hit the gym with him?

      [–]1Dev_on 15 points16 points  (4 children)

      I dunno, none of that really sounds alpha, just sounds degenerative more than anything. Male hedonism.

      [–]alpha_n3rd 8 points9 points  (3 children)

      Yeah, the alpha wolf leads the pack to success, not self-destruction.

      [–]1Dev_on 1 point2 points  (2 children)

      hows it work, bear with me, haven't read it in a while.

      The pack leader gets first meal, all the chicks, everything... but when shit hits the fan, he's the first one off the line too.

      no risk no reward I guess

      [–]alpha_n3rd 2 points3 points  (1 child)

      There's always a beta wolf angling for the top spot. If the alpha is an ineffective leader, the betas will gang up on him and a new alpha will emerge.

      [–]1Dev_on 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      I have a ton of top military brass that I can parade around to disagree with you.

      Unfortunately, you can become an effective leader, or a careerist, very rarely have I seen both in the same person.

      having said that, those ones are fucking awesome, lifes just too easy now, what with penecilin and carbohydrates and stuff... a shitty alpha wolf isn't going to doom the herd anymore.

      modernlifeproblems

      [–]gentleViking 0 points1 point  (1 child)

      There's the kind of Alpha you want to be and the kind that you don't. This kind has a shelf life. Be the kind that goes the distance.

      [–]sabbath06 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Nothin wrong with a lil yak

      [–]thredditsowaway 100 points101 points  (7 children)

      Not just a lack, for some of us it was a choice. My father was reasonably present in my childhood, and offered relatively RP advice when I first started experiencing the SMP. The problem was that my mother's BP advice made me feel a lot better and was a lot easier to swallow.

      I don't have the heart to tell her that her protectiveness is the root of all my problems because I know she meant well. I'd rather blame myself for choosing the easy path over the right one, but when you're like 10 years old it's hard to see where each one really goes.

      [–]disorderly 25 points26 points  (6 children)

      My situation exactly. Growing up I knew it would be easier dealing with my mom and cut my dad out of my life for the most part.

      The good news is that we've reconnected and built our relationship up. I was so proud after hanging out with him and realizing that he's alpha as fuck (divorced now).

      [–][deleted]  (4 children)

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        [–]disorderly -3 points-2 points  (3 children)

        I understood that women almost always raise BP boys...

        [–][deleted]  (2 children)

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          [–]YourFoxyFriend 5 points6 points  (1 child)

          Both of my parents are RP, but I fell for the whole White Knight thing because I figured that's what girls wanted. In the process of breaking out of blue pill, I got into a fight with my LTR and went to my mom for advice. She told me to put my foot down and put her in her place. If she doesn't go into her place, dump her. She's not worth that shit.

          Probably the most important relationship advice i've ever heard.

          [–]thredditsowaway 1 point2 points  (0 children)

          I've done the same with my father and it's great. I love spending time with him learning self-sufficiency things, playing a game together, or even just having a beer at the bar. My parents are still very happy together, and always were, but I just avoided my dad's advice because I knew it would be "tough love."

          [–][deleted]  (2 children)

          [deleted]

            [–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

            My thoughts exactly. Dad is as alpha as one can get. I'm falling short. This is the push I needed.

            [–]peakmen 40 points41 points  (10 children)

            My dad is the most alpha guy I know, he's the guy that has banged 200+ women and even though he's 51 he still has 25 year olds going after him. The problem with that is that he left my mum when I was 5 and I didn't reconnect with him till I was 18. I missed out on all the proper male upbringing and it caused so much damage.

            Since the discovery of TRP and bonding with my dad I have been amazed at all the bullshit I used to believe. Its like my life has colour again and I have energy and confidence to do things.

            [–]1renzy77 65 points66 points  (7 children)

            Alphas leave a lot of alpha-widows in their wake. And the women they leave behind go on to raise sons to be the very opposite kind of man as the one who pumped-and-dumped her, despite the fact that it means their sons will personify the very opposite of what attracted her in the first place.

            You are in a vulnerable position the moment you become attracted to someone. One of the reasons that women who give blue-pill advice are doing so, is because they don't want to be in a position of vulnerability, despite the fact that the vulnerability can only exist because the attraction existed before it.

            A mother who says something along the lines of "My son won't break women's hearts the way his father broke mine." is essentially saying "My son won't be able to attract women in the first place, in order to break their hearts later on."

            As Roissy has stated many times, The defensive crouch is where female tingles are born

            That's why so many in the blue world see the red-pill as advice on how to "hurt" women. Because the ability to "hurt" and the ability to attract are just flip-sides of the same coin.

            [–]brotherjustincrowe 7 points8 points  (5 children)

            I remember reading a story on the Something Awful forums around '06-'07 about a kid whose mother was such a bitter alpha widow she basically forced a sex-change on him by saying he "couldn't be a boy" anymore and she "couldn't love" him as a male.

            [–]GhostOfAladdin 15 points16 points  (2 children)

            This should be child abuse and punished accordingly. Poor kid.

            [–]brotherjustincrowe 12 points13 points  (0 children)

            It's hard to think of a feminist mother as anything but an abuser of male children. From the Netherlands: http://brightage.net/storage/articles/son-of-a-feminist.html

            And those who remember the BitingBeaver saga? http://riehlworldview.com/2007/08/do-some-radical.html I can't imagine how it must fuck you up in the head having a paranoid delusional mother wishing death on you because you're theoretically capable of raping somebody at some time and place, maybe.

            [–]1Dev_on -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

            it's the internet. most likely a BS story anyways

            [–]fortifiedoranges 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            That place went to hell in a hand basket. I think the final straw for me was the people sticking up for one of their staff members, who raped a child. What a shithole.

            [–]nothere_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            Something Awful forums

            those were the days of being a goon

            [–]sunwukong155 39 points40 points  (8 children)

            Great post and you have an awesome mindset, but here is a warning.

            I hate to say it, but I want to be the opposite of my father. Tougher, stronger, fitter, masculine, you get the picture.

            The opposite of crazy is also crazy. If you have read No More Mr Nice Guy, that should ring a bell. There is a large segment of that book that talks about young boys who see their fathers as failures and strive to be the opposite of their notion of their father. If this book is not a part of your self improvment plan, I would add it in.

            I challange you to take a more careful look at your father, and while recognizing his many faults, try to find good things about him. You may notice you and him share more traits and habits than you think.

            [–]alpha_n3rd 12 points13 points  (0 children)

            Adapt what is useful, reject what is useless, and add what is specifically your own.

            -- Bruce Lee

            A knee jerk reaction to be the opposite of your father is silly. Apply the Bruce Lee principle.

            [–]attractive_craft 3 points4 points  (1 child)

            Great point. Also I see the whole "be the opposite of my dad" being a victim of fate in the same way that "be exactly like my dad" would be. Either way you are living your life determined by who your parents are or were. True freedom is being yourself, whatever that is for you. And not giving a fuck who it's like or not like.

            [–]1Dev_on 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            I prefer the 'what not to do' lessons. At least then the worst that happens is you hit the middleground.

            [–]Grainslol 8 points9 points  (4 children)

            I came on here to mention this. My dad has PTSD from Vietnam and told me during a discussion several months ago that he can only form emotional bonds with other Vietnam survivors. As a role model he's very beta and liberal and still encourages chivalry. So unless I go to war and kill in the triple digits and get 2 purple hearts and psychological trauma, I'm shit out of luck on that end.

            [–]loin_fruit 17 points18 points  (1 child)

            Its true. Haven't seen my dad since I was 5 and I'm 24. When you have too many betas and too many women in your life, there is no back bone. There is no way of learning or seeing how women really get the gina tingles.

            [–]Dark triad expert: - http://illimitablemen.com/ - [3 Points]IllimitableMan 16 points17 points  (0 children)

            When you have too many betas and too many women in your life, there is no back bone. There is no way of learning or seeing how women really get the gina tingles.

            It is this mental prison that many young boys and men have sought to escape.

            [–]gimmieareason 8 points9 points  (0 children)

            Interesting. My situation is completely the opposite. While my dad is definitely getting older, he's still one of the most alpha, RP guys that I know. And I never noticed it until I grew up and found this subreddit. He always holds his frame, and he isn't scared of anyone, it doesn't matter how big they are.

            Some day I'm going to be just like him. Maybe not today, but its a beautiful journey ahead and I am on a mission

            [–]Gaydolf 6 points7 points  (0 children)

            Not quite for me. I had an incredible male role model- my dad. But my beta, nerd feminist brother who taught me that exercise was the devil and everyone else was wrong destroyed my childhood. I broke off friendships, refused to play, and dedicated myself to being pale. Then he went to college my sophomore year of high school. My life turned around pretty quick after I realized everything I hated about myself was because I wanted to be like him. My grades improved, I finally made friends, I went to the gym, etc etc. Stopped being a beta and saw things the way they were. TRP has been the best thing to happen to me.

            [–]Anderfail 17 points18 points  (4 children)

            My dad was and is an alpha, but I am here because he literally fed me nothing but bullshit my whole life. He would tell me to do always bluepill shit and then do the opposite in his personal life. Everything came natural to him as my mom always defers to him for everything.

            While I have a good relationship with him now, I am somewhat bitter at never having had a single real relationship conversation with my dad where he told me the way of the world and why I had to be a certain way. So while I can look at him and respect him for being a good dad, I still never really had a real male role model to look up to.

            Most of my friends are in similar positions. Our fathers were natural alphas, they just assumed we knew it all and didn't realize how feminized everything had become since they were kids.

            [–]NoRegretj 4 points5 points  (3 children)

            I think this goes along with the school being VERY different from back then. They also want you to make mistakes and learn on your own

            [–]Anderfail 8 points9 points  (1 child)

            While clearly ignoring how the world has changed around them. I was fed bullshit about marriage, how I'm supposed to act, etc. that all was blue pill shit that doesn't work. He still assumes chivalry means something to women when it doesn't mean a goddamn thing and only makes you look like a bitch. I was taught to put women before myself. All this shit got me is a marriage where I was miserable. Until I found red pill I was fucking clueless.

            Just one damn conversation with real honesty is all I have wanted, but nope I just got told the same shit every time. Respect women, happy wife happy life, do unto others as you would have them do unto you. Maybe he was terrified of being vilified by others, but goddammit I am your son. I looked up to you and respected you.

            This is why I don't care about helping other men to become men. You're on your own and it's up to you to fix your own shit. I will never hold my tongue if the truth needs to be said.

            [–]FetusFeces 6 points7 points  (0 children)

            I've done some probing concerning my father's observations of inter-generational changes regarding this stuff. He has absolutely no idea that anything has changed, and it's not because he's intentionally ignoring it. We have to acknowledge that our fathers' experience with these things is, always has been, and will remain fundamentally different than ours.

            When they hear the word "feminism", they think something along the lines of women's suffrage and a few more women employed in the workforce. When we use the word "feminism", we're referring to the fact that our future wives (lifelong immature) girls are de facto sluts (their daughters!!)--that it's now the norm rather than the exception; that divorce will be more or less an assurance for our unfortunate less-aware peers; that employers now favor women to a ridiculous degree; that the sexual distribution has altered so much that a majority of their sons are for all intents and purposes celibate.

            Honestly, the idea that I would marry and have a family has always seemed absurd; I figured out most of the red pill common sense stuff here before discovering the Men's Club of the Internet. That I independently came to these approximate conclusions regarding life and love--I, as a son of upper-middle-class lifelong-married Ridiculously Conservative White Christian Conservative parents--that tells you just how pervasive, insidious, and totally fucking invisible this cancer really is.

            edit: I may have gotten derailed a bit, but seriously: it's like two different dimensions right next to each other, and the parents/children in one can't even comprehend the fact that the children/parents in the other will live/have lived totally different lives.

            [–]alpha_n3rd 2 points3 points  (0 children)

            They also want you to make mistakes and learn on your own

            To take this attitude to it's logical conclusion we'd throw our kids out in the woods and hope they come back in 18 years fully grown, educated, and well-adjusted. But that's not an effective way to raise a kid, prima fascia.

            I'm not saying be a helicopter parent. But don't assume your kids are just going to figure everything out by themselves either. Our ability to efficiently communicate information to our offspring is what really separates us from the other apes.

            [–]2 Endorsed Contributorvengefully_yours 6 points7 points  (0 children)

            My dad and mom were rp, except for what mom told me about girls. I learned from dad how to pick up chicks, because dad is a salesman. He is adept at reading people and then manipulating them to where they "feel" like they got a good deal. One of my brothers and I have that skill, the rest don't.

            I listened to mom and society about how to keep agirl around, and it drove them away. Now I understand that to keep a steady flow of pussy coming, I need to stay how I am while im getting to know them, or trying to fuck them. When I'm that way, girls throw themselves at me, its kinda funny to watch. Now I know exactly what to do if I want to get rid of them. Be nice, kiss her ass and ask for some pussy. Works flawlessly.

            [–]Settlethefuckdown 3 points4 points  (0 children)

            my dad has always been prevalent in my life and happily married to my mom for almost 40 years. He is a Pastor of a huge Church and runs that Church and his family in the most stoic and alpha manner I've ever seen. TRP just reinforces everything I've always learned from him

            [–]Favrus 3 points4 points  (0 children)

            My dad was out of the picture all of my life. Parents divorced when I was 8. Mom always took me to baseball practice and games. dad never bothered going. Dad never bothered with anything at all. He was too busy banging some slut on the side. The funny thing is he married a domineering bitch of a woman after divorcing my mother.

            I see the difference in my sisters 2 sons by different fathers. Son #1 has the typical alpha male dad. Physically fit, firefighter headstrong independent type of guy. His son is outgoing, physically fit, and the same alpha type personality as his dad. IMO he slightly above average in looks , but he has always had the hottest of girlfriends (8.5's).

            Son #2 has the meek, quiet dad. The loner type content in his own little world. Son #2 is average looking but does terrible with the females and has few if any friends in general. Has no game, thinks orbiting is game. He once had a crush on a girl a few months back. He told me he was going to send her some flowers ($150.00 worth). I knew nothing of the girl, but I knew him. I told him he would be much better off spending that money on himself, or even flushing it down the toilet. He refused to listen. The girl has a boyfriend now and doesn't give son #2 the time of day.

            [–]fiat_lux_ 3 points4 points  (1 child)

            However, I was always coddled, and told that "being boystrous" isnt everything. Or that "you don't have to go to the gym" etc etc.

            My father was a decent role model. Dedicated, diligent, technically intelligent (STEM PhDs)

            ... but he was a classic beta. To top it off, we were dirt poor, so I was told to focus 100% on academics. Nothing else mattered. Or so they claimed.

            They ended up being happier as I got physically stronger late in HS and then throughout college. They claimed to only care about academics, but I will never forget how proud they were about successful boxing bouts or standing on my back as I did pushups.

            Adult role models are great, but don't just rely on adult role models. Become an adult. There's still time.

            Your parents are not meant to merely be reached. They are meant to be surpassed

            [–]improve_myself 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            Your parents are not meant to merely be reached. They are meant to be surpassed

            And that's what all good parents wish as well

            [–]X-Coordinate 2 points3 points  (0 children)

            Amen brother.

            I personally didn't know if my father was a beta because he died four months after I was born... My older brother was 15 when that happened and he did what he could as a male role model but you know, he lost his father that day too. Of course, this had an impact in my upbringing and I had to face many difficulties growing up such as bullying, lack of direction and a tendency to run away from whichever problem I had. No matter what, my mother was there to comfort as OP says in his post. My older brother tried to snap me out of this dynamic and we had a lot of fights while growing up because I wanted to stay on my mother's lap and he'd already experienced the "real world" as he used to tell me and I bet he knew exactly how this was going to end. Now I value my brother more than ever and I don't really blame my mother for anything that has happened because all of us lost something the day my father died... It's just that now I've seen things as they really are and that's what prepared me to start making changes.

            Sorry for the blog post OP, your post really hitted home for me.

            [–]TankVet 2 points3 points  (0 children)

            I'm here because I like reading the stuff. My dad was and is an alpha male badass. I model myself after him, I try to be like him, I love my dad.

            I also try to do things better. I try to be more of a surprise than him. My dad is a tough guy, a get it done kind of guy but everybody always saw him coming. I don't like that, I am more effective as a person when I am unexpected, unanticipated. His mantra is "never let 'em see ya sweat," mine is more "never let 'em see ya coming."

            I'm here reading the stuff because I agree with some of it. I dismiss some of it too. Also, some of you write extremely well.

            [–]94redstealth 2 points3 points  (0 children)

            I disagree. my father was a strong make figure in my life. a man's man. I learned so much from him. but I spent more time with society than him and society beat me into a ball of blue pill mush.

            [–]antariusz 2 points3 points  (0 children)

            I'm like a few other people here, my dad used to be pretty alpha in his youth, but he and my mom divorced when I was young, because he cheated on her with a younger woman. So I spent a lot of my youth hearing my mom badmouth my dad and I grew up wanting nothing to be like my dad. Then later on, my dad became really beta with his new wife, and would complain all the time about her nagging and would lie all the time to her, but I got the wrong lesson from that, not to do what you want, but instead I learned to keep woman happy just do whatever they ask... And obviously that didn't work out for me, I was a virgin until 26, and I thought that's just how relationships "were". And I wanted nothing to do with it.

            [–]1Dev_on 2 points3 points  (1 child)

            I had a bunch of really shitty ones growing up, and they taught me what not to do...

            does that work?

            [–]FrontTooth 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            Maybe its just the other side of the same coin..

            Perhaps, what didnt kill you didnt make u stronger. U are here afterall.

            [–]zephyrprime 2 points3 points  (0 children)

            It's not just our parents. It's a society that constantly tells you that gender roles are morally wrong. Well too fucking bad because it is precisely men who live up to the male gender role who are attractive to women. Women may espouse pc bullshit out of their mouths but in reality, they vote with their pussy.

            [–]TekkomanKingz 2 points3 points  (0 children)

            Many males on here actually have several prominent male role models who succeed financially and otherwise. But they lack deep mastery of the concepts surrounding our biological imperative and natural gender dynamics.

            Some of us are further along than others but we all have a ways to go towards our own personal goals and journeys.

            [–]man0man 2 points3 points  (1 child)

            My dad is the most red pill guy i've ever met and he doesn't even try. Unfortunately that meant he was never around with all the women he was boning on the side. The result is pretty much the same.

            [–]FrontTooth -1 points0 points  (0 children)

            Hmm. I thought his rebellius attitude, or his natural charisma, would still smite you somewhat in that case. Are you sure that maybe you were not just born less douchy?

            [–]jerrytheman1998 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            My dad is naturally red pill and as far as I know doesn't read or know about this whole thing. He has minor beta qualities I see sometimes but overall I was brought up with some basic RP principles.

            What I'm meaning to say is you don't necessarily have to be without a male role model to find the info here helpful, it's good to read either way

            [–]admirals_go_nuts 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            Amen, dad died here, age 4

            [–]NabroleonBonaparte 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            It's crazy knowing this and thinking about how things played out to get to where I'm at now.

            My paternal grandfather died when my dad was young and he grew up beta which led to my parents divorce. It sucked so bad that I made a vow to learn how relationships work to have a perfect marriage and never let my child experience the same.

            Went hella blue pill then fell to oneitus. Found TRP and finally have the tools to accomplish that goal...

            Now I have absolutely no desire for marriage anymore. Just spin plates and set a RP example for others not in the know.

            Funny how life plays out eh?

            [–]ConcealingFate 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            My mom racks in the cash and my dad worked dead end jobs. The irony. She said she liked him because he was a nice guy and a great father but had she known he'd never get an actual career, she probably wouldn't have gone for him.

            [–]CornyHoosier 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            I am an only-child who was raised by all women. I had to learn everything about being a man, finances & living healthy on top of all the standard things everyone learns.

            [–]wee_woo 1 point2 points  (1 child)

            Man, at least you had a father present in your life, for better or for worse.

            My father left my mother and I and decided to emulate King Henry VIII. He is currently on his fifth wife.

            [–]FrontTooth 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            Funniest input ive read in this thread. 5 wives, really? How many kids? And what did that cost you?

            [–]8675309c 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            my dad has always been a man of few words, quite stoic, treated the radfem brigade as a shit test throughout the years...

            but although he was present, he was a stoner who kept his attention on work, weed, and his car. my mom got huge, housework never got done (no steps were installed for the back door for over 10 years), and he cried in front of my mom when his mother died

            shortly after that, dad suspected she was cheating. he left a note and was GONE. he left her after 19 years because she started having GNOs. he was sick of her shit and went his own way

            my dad is a red pill man who made few mistakes. he just didn't invest in his son or daughter beyond just being present in their lives

            I will say I've learned from watching him passively, but i didn't learn enough from him to be able to take on huge things like marriage and kids... divorce is the reason I found TRP, and TRP is the reason I was able to bounce back stronger than ever

            [–]Muzzygooner 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            My dad was a nice guy, but he wasn't there most of the time, and when he was,he was a wimp. I grew up with 4 women and no men in my life. My mom is the kindest person ever, but I didn't need that growing up.

            [–]HardBounce 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            Yup, I am the son of Dr. Betabux. Women have been walking over him and exploiting his wealth and good nature for as long as I've know him.

            I was never taught to be a man by him. To this day he still has no clue. He has always talked about how now I am successful and wealthy women should be lining up for me and a good relationship is just around the corner. He doesn't understand that this is. Blue pill Betabux look on life. I am here because dr. Betabux has failed me.

            [–]jungle-life 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            I wouldn't change a damn thing about my father.

            [–]PlanB_pedofile 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            My dad was a slight womanizer. My siblings are all half siblings but he stayed with my mom. He also made sure i had a relationship with my siblings. They even lived with us. They were half blood but we were together like full blood.

            I didn't like how my dad cheated on my mom. With that i swore loyalty even though i shoulda dated around more.

            He got overweight but after the first heart attack he tried slimming down. I can't assign alpha or beta. He tried many things, failed many things. Running a bar, teaching, ran for election, management, ended being a pipe fitter. Kept the family together. Paid child support all the way to 23. Died at 55 from a sudden heart attack.

            As much as i hated his bad traits. The cheating, the debt, poor financial decisions. I admire his good traits such as honor, family, and trying even though not succeeding.

            I just wished i developed that steadfastness earlier than being idle for nearly 10 years. Oh well. Best time to plant a tree is 20 years ago. The 2nd best time is now.

            [–]GiganticTree 1 point2 points  (2 children)

            On the contrary my Dad is pretty alpha, it's just that he was too busy with work and doing his own thing all the time that my Mom was the who ended up raising me 99% of the time

            [–]FrontTooth 0 points1 point  (1 child)

            Its a known common problem of the industrial workaholic society. How did he spend his free time? He must have had some weekends and vacations

            [–]lloopy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            Same here. Dad's so fat he can't tie his shoes without struggling.

            He's got a girl he buys stuff for so she'll talk to him, but there's no sex for him, and this will never change. From now til the end of his life.

            For me, I want something better.

            [–]Red_Invictus 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            Well said. We have found a way here, and must never forget it, how to be our own man in this world, forging ahead.

            That being said, I'm glad to see more encouraging posts instead of "shut the fuck up, you're doing xyz wrong, blah blah blah and go lift faggot /brotalk".

            We are NOT here to coddle our fellow men, but we aren't here to berate them either. We're here to improve ourselves.

            [–]Thelaterbloomerstory 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            So much on life depends on the kind of parents you had. It has an impact on how you think, what kind of school you go to, and even how you behave around others. We don't want to accept it because it is tough to do so and because we have no outcome on it but a lot of how we turn out has to do with genetics, parents, and the circumstances we were placed in during our pasts. It even affects us into adulthood because we are constantly trying to change the way we think about things which can be tough.

            Society expects you to have it all figured out by the age of 21 but the fact is you only become independent at the age of 18 in most cases. If you have awful parents, you aren't even independent at 18 because they won't let go of you and let you be on your own. You have to fight for your independence. Then, from 18-21 you are doing everything to get rid of the beliefs that were pushed on you for 18 years.

            Society does not understand this, they want results, they think everyone grows up in the same ideal household they grew up and gets the same love they got growing up.

            [–]1Jaereth 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            That's why I am here. My dad was a total RP man. He never cared to teach me any of that or spend that much time with me though. Had to learn it on my own, and looking back, I really wish I would have wayyyy sooner in life rather than later.

            Make sure your sons know what's up guys.

            [–]DolorousRedd 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            The greater my relationship with my father, the more at ease I am.

            [–]hybridwarrior 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            Brother,

            Thanks for sharing. It's good to know where you came from, but my advice from personal experience as an only child of a "broken" home of divorced parents and an over-protective mother, is: don't over analyze your situation or your past.

            Own up to your responsibility to yourself and focus on what you CAN control and what you CAN do going forward. We are humans. We are influenced by our environment. We are also influenced by our habits and our responses and our perceptions of our environment.

            I am at a similar position. "Waking up" and understanding we want to create a better version of our selves while being fully aware of all that surrounds us, including resources that are helpful ($, shelter, human interaction & contact, gym/home workout equipment/our own bodies, etc.) and those things or people around us that are toxic/negative/NOT helpful for us becoming a better version.

            I personally love the mindset of crafting and becoming the best version of ourselves (whatever that vision looks like as individuals) so that just by our presence we can inspire and influence the same in those around us. We can't control how they respond (positively or negatively) but we can control our own response to their response and keep on going forward.

            I think you will love this video and find inspiration in this because I also find much inspiration in movies, actors, & characters who display strength, courage, determination, and the ability to persevere. Be the hero of your own movie.

            https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YTuElM6T50w

            [–]BGE13 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            I know where you're coming from, man. I was raised by a single mother, coddled a lot more than I should have been (though not to a totally ridiculous extent), but I was lucky to have a couple of great male role models in my late teens and early twenties. One of them taught me to play the guitar, the other taught me philosophy and general tough-mindedness. I don't know where the fuck I would be without those guys.

            [–]lubeoil 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            From the series Marco Polo, Kublai Khan says when speaking of his father, "I realized that I had to become the man I wished my father was."

            might not be an actual quote from the real kublai, but it delivers the message

            [–]Hughtub 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            I almost think lifting weights by itself is the majority of the solution. When you have in your recent memory lifting heavy shit around and pushing your body to its max, you are NOT going to put up with any soft shit from someone else. It's no wonder that fit people get a reputation for being tough-minded.

            [–]favourthebold 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            Yeah man. My Dad wasn't always fat. But when he got a gut that's what freaked me out to get the the gym. Approaching six pack now. It's legit motivation.

            [–]rpdoomed 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            I think the title is bullshit. I have a very RP father, and I just managed to find this sub. This group put to words what I knew to be true. It helped me define my thought process. I know there are a lot of people like you, but not all of us are here due to a lack of proper role models.

            [–]Endorsed ContributorDoxasticPoo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            Just remember, Dr Glover often talks about men who want to be opposite of their Fathers... and usually, the opposite of crazy is still crazy.

            It's best to look at your Father objectively. Assess the positive qualities, and emulate, then assess the negative qualities, and don't emulate.

            You're Father can't be completely worthless. You're just emotionally tied up in being let down as a son. Get over it. See his positive qualities too.

            [–]Diece 0 points1 point  (24 children)

            So, what are some good role models for a guy that had none? I feel having a list would really help guys.

            [–]Dark triad expert: - http://illimitablemen.com/ - [3 Points]IllimitableMan 10 points11 points  (22 children)

            • Jason Statham (Actor)
            • Clint Eastwood (Actor) - Obligatory mention: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NelBNtNm8l0
            • Patrice O'Neal (Comedian)
            • Elliot Hulse (Youtube star)
            • Will Smith (Motivational)
            • Vladimir Putin (Russian President/Dark Triad)
            • Arnold Schwarzenegger (Motivational, former actor, bodybuilder and governor of California)

            That's just off the top of my head.

            [–]RandomAnecdote 8 points9 points  (0 children)

            In retrospect, my favorite movies are one where there's a mentor character who helps the hero reach his goal. Almost every time the hero goes through a change for the better. Karate Kid, Matrix, Cocktail, etc.

            Didn't realize till just now that it was probably because I wanted to hear the things I wish my father had told me.

            [–]1renzy77 2 points3 points  (3 children)

            I would also argue that most movies from the 70s and earlier, before feminism really started to infect Hollywood, are much, much more red-pill than anything coming out of Hollywood in the present day. To the extent that you will go back and watch these films now, and realize that everything the RP espouses isn't a new discovery, but a rediscovery of what was already known about women before feminism came long.

            [–]Dark triad expert: - http://illimitablemen.com/ - [3 Points]IllimitableMan 2 points3 points  (2 children)

            you will go back and watch these films now, and realize that everything the RP espouses isn't a new discovery, but a rediscovery of what was already known about women before feminism came long.

            Oh most definitely. We're rediscovering what they tried to cover up. Here's the real question though. Society knowing what it knew about women still decided to let feminism take hold. Why?

            [–]ProductivityMonster 2 points3 points  (0 children)

            profit...feminized people are easy to control and easy to incorporate into the labor force.

            [–]Overkillengine 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            Some men will sell their soul and even their brother's soul for even the illusion of the possibility of getting some pussy.

            Even here. Watch your back.

            Also, as commented, profit. Which leads to power. Which leads to pussy. Etc.

            [–]2 Mredpillschool 1 point2 points  (3 children)

            Upgraded PRAW for trp bot, and now you get to be the lucky test subject!

            [–]Upvote Me!trpbot[M] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            Confirmed: 1 point awarded to /u/IllimitableMan by redpillschool. [History]

            [This is an Automated Message]

            [–]Dark triad expert: - http://illimitablemen.com/ - [3 Points]IllimitableMan 1 point2 points  (1 child)

            PRAW

            What's PRAW?

            [–]1wakethfkupneo 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            [–]disorderly 1 point2 points  (1 child)

            Celebrities as male role models? Fuck that. Approach the RP men you know in the real world (or go find some) and ask them to be you're mentor.

            [–]Dark triad expert: - http://illimitablemen.com/ - [3 Points]IllimitableMan 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            There's always one, I was waiting for "you" to comment. Not interested in arguing over it. Do whatever works for you.

            [–]Diece 0 points1 point  (7 children)

            Jack Nicholson? Russell brand?

            [–]Dark triad expert: - http://illimitablemen.com/ - [3 Points]IllimitableMan 1 point2 points  (6 children)

            Nicholson, sure. Brand? He's got game but if you saw his latest spat on Question Time you'd seriously question the guy's logical capacity.

            [–]musicvita25[S] 0 points1 point  (5 children)

            Brand is bored. Simple.

            He's too brainwashed by the buddhist mindset that he needs to "give back" but at the end of the day, he's fighting a losing battle.

            [–]Dark triad expert: - http://illimitablemen.com/ - [3 Points]IllimitableMan 2 points3 points  (4 children)

            Mate I don't know if you saw it but Brand went full hamster. I held Brand in much higher esteem until I saw that.

            Relevant link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q2RSKJC-ugk

            Go to 18:55 to see the context of Russell's hamstering. Skip to 20:50 to see it. Again at 25:50 even more hamstering. Skip to 24:55 to see crazy cat lady with purple hair kicking off. This show was epic but Russell looked like a tit.

            [–]Sauerkraut206 0 points1 point  (3 children)

            Russell Brand is a flamboyant marxist piece of shit... why anyone listens to anything he says is insane to me.

            [–]Dark triad expert: - http://illimitablemen.com/ - [3 Points]IllimitableMan 1 point2 points  (2 children)

            He's basically an entertainer with strong views. I don't agree with his politics but I appreciate him for entertainment value. I wouldn't vote him in as an MP though, let's put it that way. Plenty of idiots would though. He says all the right blue pill bullshit that everybody wants to hear.

            [–]musicvita25[S] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

            He's a genius, because it may very well get him into power. Thats all he wants, some form of power.

            [–]Dark triad expert: - http://illimitablemen.com/ - [3 Points]IllimitableMan 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            Indisputably I have him pegged 2 outta 3 on the DT (narc and mach) don't think he's psycho but it's possible.

            [–]duckspeed -1 points0 points  (0 children)

            Does anyone know a sociopathic alpha like Putin who speaks English?

            [–]attractive_craft 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            That's entirely up to you in my opinion. But I go out of my way to make sure I'm around strong positive male leaders. Like having a male boss I like. I have had female bosses and it's a bit weird. Also having a good martial arts instructor whose a man will help. I have several such guys I look up to.

            [–]IDGAFN7 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            Yeah, I grew up in a feminine environment full of women, without my father, i even knew or felt then what it will raise me wrong and make me looking at the world from the wrong scope. I was so happy I found TRP to use it to forge me into a man with goals and ambitions. Even my family( all women except my uncle who didmt give a shit about me, and now I realize why) noticed something changed in me after months of face to face contact.

            [–]deadsupra 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            Here are my role models: George Carlin, Dave Ramsey (just money, not religion), Bill Hicks, Adam Carolla, Charlemange the God.. That's what I got for now.

            [–]1oldredder 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            Really? I feel the opposite. I'm here to observe the most up to date updates to what I've already seen & lived that women have a lower quality of integrity & do harm to men, and society in general is built to enslave us since we're the work-horses, to see the fine details of how that plays out around the world.

            I never lacked a strong male role model. I was raised by a single father.

            I'm sure I can't be the only one.

            [–]Mihawk01 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            Good post.

            Just getting heartbroken is probably not the best advice... haha.

            But really for some reason got me thinking. Obviously you just meant this in a passing remark, meaning that it is okey to fail... but it has struck with me for some reason.

            The main reason being that if getting rejected by women is seen as being a big thing, then you are soooo fucking far back from where you need to be, it is fucking crazy. You cannot have fucking feelings for women this way... you fuck her, make fun of her, tease her, get her to make you dinner, and suck your dick after. Then you go to sleep, even better if you ignored her after getting your dick suck, in the morning she will love you more for it. That is it. Nothing else. There is no love. If she finds a dick more suitable, she will blow you off in a second. That is why always have a couple of plates.

            So yeah, getting heartbroken is not even advisable when you are 15 (fuck her, bitches come and go, get 5 new plates is the solution and the motto), never mind any older than that. Very blue pill mentally to even mention that shit.

            So yeah, never even think about feeling any shit like that. It is never acceptable. If you do, go fuck some bitches. You will be more than fine after that.

            [–]Prattler26 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            We are a direct results of our parents upbringing, but blaming it on them is easy and pointless.

            In order to take responsibility for yourself, you must assign responsibility to your parents. You will never truly take responsibility for yourself without doing the same to your parents.

            [–]SheepKing 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            we are a generation of boy grown by women

            [–]I_HaveAHat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            So what are some examples of strong male role models in tv and film? Aside from mad men of course

            [–]BlueFreedom420 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            Also bad fathers can bring you here. I hated my step father so much that I hated men.

            [–]dakevs 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            I just had a thought. Do we have a list of movies/books that contain good male/masculine role models?

            [–]zwiebelsaft 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            This is why I'm swallowing a giant red pill and never looking back.

            [–]Snivellious 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            My dad was too far in to get a divorce when he had me. He was probably a pretty fun guy when he first got married, but he was an alcoholic to cope with marriage by the first time I can remember.

            My uncle is MGTOW, which might be masculine but doesn't tend to be a role model.

            My grandfather is too irascible and old school to be truly relevant, even if he is masculine.

            I don't have a "modern" role model, and that's why I'm here. Thanks for the reminder.

            [–]Ambarsariya 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            Lift weights, get healthy, learn game, get a style, sleep with lots of women, get heartbroken, chase your dreams and most of all:

            Never fucking give up

            This is essentially everything for a guy.

            [–]jcrpta 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            Deeper than that.

            I'm here because of a lack of male role models in my Father's life. I looked up to him when he was alive, and I still miss him. But dear God did he need to know all this. He needed to know it twenty years before I was born.

            His dad was away on business most of the time he was growing up, which meant he had a pretty lonely childhood, raised by his mum.

            He joined the Navy at the age of about 18; the "official" view within the family doesn't really consider why. But I have a pretty good idea:

            • Around that time, his dad would have been retiring. The man who was away on business all the time was suddenly at home a lot more.
            • I have Dad's naval records, and they're interesting reading. He was promoted a few times, mainly because in those days it was pretty well automatic based on years of service until you reached the lowest rungs of being an officer. After that, promotion was based on merit.
            • He reached that point, occasionally found himself with responsibility - and blew it. I have reports from his superiors commenting on how he became the most senior officer on board a ship when the Captain was indisposed - yet someone else wound up having to run it. They weren't impressed.
            • Up until he was 21 (the age of majority at the time), his superiors were sending regular letters to his dad commenting on progress. One particular bit stuck out - an officer who wrote back commented on how he was sending a progress report "as requested".

            Conclusion: Grandpa came home from work for the last time, took one look at his youngest son (who was just about at school leaving age) and thought to himself "Dear God, what sort of a man is this?! Maybe if he joins the armed forces they'll be able to sort him out...."

            [–]drowninginfootwear 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            I get what your saying, and I don't disagree, but that title is cringeworthy. Don't tell me why I'm here and stop treating this like a cult.

            [–]unpluggedoasis 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            My dad is alpha as fuck but he works a lot being such a high position in his company. He was out a lot so I never really got to see his actions so I grew up so BP it is cringe worthy. My mom and dad definitely have an RP marriage though.

            [–]redpillerinnyc 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            My dad is and was alpha as fuck. He's always been loaded with bitches and money. My mother was barely out of her teens when he married her. She's taller than him (she used to be a runway model) and it doesn't phase him at all. Has never been faithful to her either.

            I'm just here because I hate bitches.

            [–]getomc 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            If we complained about our fathers not being men then we wouldn't be ourselves either now then would we?

            [–]Moszne 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            I was reading some book that was recommended here. "No more Mr. Nice guy". I thought it will be about me, but when i was reading it I realize that it was about my father. He was "Nice Guy".

            [–]mythrowawaybruh -1 points0 points  (1 child)

            "Lift weights, get healthy, learn game, get a style, sleep with lots of women, get heartbroken, chase your dreams and most of all:

            Never fucking give up"

            All good advice. Except for learn game. Don't listen to those "PUA" losers. Just talk to women and be confident and assertive while not coming across as needy.

            That PUA and game nonsense infuriates me. If you need magician slight of hand tricks to get with women, you're a lost cause.

            [–]fortifiedoranges 2 points3 points  (0 children)

            Definitely true, but there's a difference between PUA and being able to talk to women. I believe that's what he was trying to get at.

            [–]2asd1100 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            And don't look back for the fallen.

            You can not help them, you can not fight their fights. They are too far gone, too invested in a life they chose, even if they choose it by default.

            [–]balalasaurus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            I think we should do well to remember that we're not here because we want to be the opposite of our dads.

            Yes our lack of male role models brought us here. Yes for many of us, our fathers were not very good male role models. However our end goal should not be to be the opposite of our beta dads. Rather it should be to continually improve ourselves so that we are the best version of ourselves.

            We should use the examples provided to us by our BP fathers/ guardians for purely instructional purposes only. When we think that we have to develop ourselves to be the counterpoint of something or someone else, we've already lost.

            [–]Sesa_Refum 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            You are here because of lack of male role models in your life

            The guys over at bluepill are gonna have a field day with this one

            [–]SpeedMetalPunker -1 points0 points  (2 children)

            I'm here because I'm just absolutely done with women period, and I don't care for dating or any interaction with em anymore, I lift weights to get healthy, but only for myself, and nobody else, if a woman takes a liking to me, great, otherwise I'm MGTOW all the way.

            [–]Time-For-A-Wank 0 points1 point  (1 child)

            As a gay man, this makes me happy!♂♂

            [–]SpeedMetalPunker 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            Nah, I'm still straight though.

            [–]Slydermv -1 points0 points  (0 children)

            From No More Mr. Nice Guy:

            "The opposite of crazy... is crazy"

            Explore the relationship with your father... cherish the good things.... there will be some (for example, as stated, you may ant to be thankful for the hard work ethic he has), but improve upon what you have to...

            There's no black and white. It's all shades of grey.

            [–]teeelo -1 points0 points  (0 children)

            Upon further consideration, my Dad was borderline Omega. Everyone in my family suffered.

            Red Pill, I don't know what id do without you.

            [–]Sauerkraut206 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

            Lift weights, get healthy, have style, sleep with quality women, break hearts, chase your dreams..... Fixed

            [–]Ochimort -1 points0 points  (0 children)

            I was lucky enough to have a very redpill father cause European roots.

            [–]A_Nihilist -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

            Actually I'm here to read the laughably fake field reports.

            [–]1800420 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

            To me its not the betas.. But the white knights...

            [–]torontoitguy -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

            Whoa! This explains so much! My dad found "a new family" when I was 12 and ever since then I was raised by my mom. That being said, I see an immensely positive effect of that too - I understand women 100x better than a lot of my guy friends do and now that I'm on the red pill, this just adds to my arsenal of uber game! Thanks mom! Thanks dad! Alpha as fuck after all!

            [–]watersign -3 points-2 points  (5 children)

            unless your dad is a CEO or an accomplished business person who is wealthy, most, if not all of us are lacking positive male role models in our lives.

            the only thing worse than having a blue collar dad is having a dad who is a corporate drone who isnt in management. the epitome of beta

            [–]1oldredder 0 points1 point  (2 children)

            Blue-collar is solid red pill.

            Exception being those who get roped into handing over all the money to wives or spoiled daughters.

            [–]watersign 0 points1 point  (1 child)

            yea i agree to some extent but most trades people are drunks and low lives...id actually probably prefer to do something more 'trade' orientated as opposed to what i do now (data analysis/stats) but i really fucking hate most blue collar people in general. they are stupid

            [–]1oldredder 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            hm must be different in my country. Most trades people have the best homes because they have the least debt with the most cash inflow. Certainly aren't spending all their time being drunks. And they're not stupid: mechanically inclined, good planners, good with budgets, every single one I ever met. Generally I'm finding the university 'educated' types who didn't do hard sciences are far, far dumber than blue-collar workers.

            [–]FrontTooth -1 points0 points  (1 child)

            Why would a CEO constitute a male role model