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[–]17 Endorsed Contributortrudatness 371 points372 points  (101 children)

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My wife deals with million dollar accounts and is leaned on heavily by super ultra serious business men for information that is imperative for formulating their business intelligence. She really is a brilliant woman and there is no doubt I am better for knowing her.

Having said all that, she constantly has to combat emotion in order to continue to make rational choices when dealing with clients. Early on in our relationship she was constantly saying Because I'm a woman... this and Because I'm a woman... that.

She had firmly planted in her head this victim complex, that every person she dealt with in these male dominated circles had a bias against her because she was a woman. She observed that women populated support roles - worker bees - as she called it and men largely comprised the decision making roles. If she tried to contribute substantive perspectives to decision makers she was often met with resistance. She verbalized her frustration to me by saying I'm being told "Just go stand in the corner with your skirt on and we'll tell you when you are needed".

Obviously those words weren't being uttered to her, but that was her interpretation of the reactions she received.

I pointed out a local woman in her field who's a very successful business woman - and asked her why this woman is taken extremely seriously by her business peers despite this bias she says is pervasive.

Well she's a real bitch my wife said. While this may or may not be true the perception among women is in order for them to break the glass ceiling they have to be cunts.

I told her she had to shed this victim complex. But it's not faa-iir! She told me. She had a bad case of solipsism and victimhood running. Through the course of our intimate discussions, I told her basically that men experience professional difficulty and lack of fairness all the time. Not every man gets promoted to management. Not every man gets taken as seriously as they want to by managers. I related many of my personal stories about being shit on by bosses.

Everyone gets shit on by bosses - it's called paying your dues. It has nothing to do with gender. What was holding her back was her personal victim complex - not bias.

Case in point - she has a client - biggest in the firm. The owner is a wise old fox - a southern gentleman with largely a traditional view on life. Over the years, he has by and large defaulted all serious business conversations with the senior partner in her firm - who is male - even though she does all the work for him.

For a long time, this outraged her. Why wasn't she taken seriously? She expressed to me that she no longer wanted to handle this account because the old guy was a sexist asshole. This would have not been the wisest career move.

I remember speaking with her that night. Basically I told her what the man's personal opinion was of women was non-consequential. If he's sexist shitbag - who cares? You smile and work the account. You do what you have to do to keep the checks from his office continuing to roll in. Then when you get paid... You laugh all the way to the bank. If he wants to have austere convos over lunch with the senior partner - who he's known for 30-40 years let him - after all he's writing the checks isn't he?

I was a waiter for many years. Many, many customers treated me like shit. I had an iron smile through it all and gained glorious satisfaction from people giving me 20-30% even though they shit on me during service. It's not fucking personal - it's business. The question always is What do I need to do to keep getting paid in this situation? - It's never What does the customer/client need to do to make me happy?

This concept was like a revelation to my wife. Is that how men think?

Fuck yeah it is.

So the next day the senior partner calls her into his office and asked her what was up with the account and what was her temperature on it...

I just have to do whatever it takes to keep him writing checks to us... She told him.

I knew I could count on you The senior partner said.

That moment was like a break in my wife's mindset and her perspective dramatically changed.

Fast forward to now... It's my wife going on these business lunches and talking shop with the guys from this company - not the senior partner. Why? Because my wife shed her victim complex and focused completely on the task at hand. Even though old habits die hard, she's able to recognize when emotion is interfering with logic.

She'll bounce shit off me and I'll tell her my opinion and that has been a very successful formula for her.

I think this story ties in perfectly with what GLO is saying about women failing to recognize their personal agency. Women are not categorically inferior to men intellectually. They have all the ability in the world to be successful and achieve professionally and personally.

What holds them back is a lack of personal agency. In the business world, this becomes a glass ceiling. In the world of sexual strategy, dating and personal relationships - the vacuum of personal agency has to be filled by men, because men desire relationships with women. This manifests in a myriad of ways - from biased family courts - to the moving goalpost of rape definition - to high divorce rates - and so on. Men are reacting to this increasing lack of agency on the part of women, by treating relationships more casually. Men are becoming more self-interested because their increased agency increases their risk. Some men are going their own way and not engaging in male-female relationships at all.

GLO playfully (as usual) says the solution is to treat women like crying toddlers and look past their whining and seek out root cause (Greek yogurt and walk). He's mocking women to get them to see their own folly (heh negging). My solution was to have a series of well made points - exemplified by personal experience. Once I convinced my wife to put what I was telling her into practice and she discovered the immediate success in it - she was a believer. Then again, my wife is probably more pragmatic than most.

TL;DR: You won't be taken seriously without agency. You can't have equality without agency. Men will increasingly become self-interested in reaction to bearing the additional burden of added agency in compensation for women's decreasing agency. Although the perks are sweet in the short run, diminishing agency will create more pervasive barriers for women.

[–]1redpillbanana 16 points17 points  (3 children)

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Great story. To be honest, many men would also do well by following this advice.

It's great to see these situations where you can utter one line and it puts everyone completely at ease. When your wife said, "I just have to do whatever it takes to keep him writing checks to us..." I can just imagine how the body language of the senior partner changed - he probably looked at her, maybe a bit surprised at first, relaxed his body, tilted his head a bit, and broke out in a huge smile.

[–]17 Endorsed Contributortrudatness 24 points25 points  (2 children)

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The disclaimer here is that anything necessary denotes anything legal and ethical of course.

But yeah... He did smile. I know the partner pretty well. He's a good dude by anyone's definition, and he's a pretty smart business man. He's got a reputation in the community as being a straight shooter and many of the old school, old money business interests seek him out for these kinds of business discussions.

It's no insult to my wife that people look past her to his office to discuss matters of business. If anything, it's to her credit now that she's starting to be seen in the same light.

I personally believe that stereotypes get formed from commonalities exhibited in certain types of people, however I'm not an absolutist.

There's a big difference between the two women I married.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not going to take credit for my wife's successes, just as she shouldn't take credit for mine. However, I've brought the best out her and she's definitely contributed to the progress I've made. I don't at all believe that this belies TRP principles. I think it reinforces them.

When you create a positive cycle in an LTR good things happen. I've long believed that true wealth comes from the strength of the family. It only becomes fully realized when the Patriarch and the Matriarch are together with their children and their children's children. The true strength comes from the collective talents of all of the family individuals interacting with a minimum of dysfunction. Financial wealth is a natural by product of this success.

Too many people put too much emphasis in getting the Lexus by 28 years old. That's not as important as building something real and lasting.

Feminism is a doctrine of selfishness, loathing and manipulation. Nothing reflects this more than how feminists regard families. Unfortunately, when forging business relationships these kinds of attitudes can be counter intuitive. It is difficult to build trust dealing with someone who is a tornado of egocentricism. Who's interests do they serve? The Shareholders and the Stakeholders? Or their own myopic concerns?

[–]1redpillbanana 5 points6 points  (1 child)

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Well-said. If you're able to build a family that works as a team and builds on the talents of the individual members, then that seems extremely RP to me.

Regarding feminism, I wrote something similar to this in another thread:

TRP: self-actualization

Feminism: self-pedestalization

[–]QQ_L2P 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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Heh, true words. Though I can imagine just about how well your post was met.

[–]SgtSplacker 66 points67 points  (14 children)

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Great post, I actually read the whole thing. You are spot on, man. And it's a tuffie because you can't tell women sexism doesn't exist. It does, but it's the same BS everyone has to deal with. Blacks and women live their lives thinking everything is because of their gender or color. You must move past that. Everyone suffers the same things just in different ways. And if you let that nonsense consume you then you are losing before the race even begins.

[–]TehFuggernaut 10 points11 points  (3 children)

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I've been trying to explain this to a woman I work with. I wish I could copy/paste this to her, but she's 17 years my senior and it's not worth over-stepping my bounds. She literally gets upset/sends emotional emails to everyone that comes back to her with a problem. I notice the CS girls doing the same, internally.

[–]SgtSplacker 8 points9 points  (2 children)

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I really think the only reason their worked is because it was his wife. Any other relation and you would see some real hostility.

[–]17 Endorsed Contributortrudatness 27 points28 points  (1 child)

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Try telling what I said to my wife to an unaffiliated female co-worker...

You would probably get reported to HR - which is a female dominated business segment. You probably will have a bad result even though the advice is rock solid sound.

[–][deleted]  (17 children)

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[deleted]

    [–]HeadingRed 10 points11 points  (0 children)

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    Agreed- and also use up more of your time. As a boss and a team member it is quite amazing the amount of face time a woman requires vs. a man. I had to train myself to say "how did that make you feel". I did this to get to what was needed- once feelings were expressed actionable information could be exchanged. Without this emotional palette cleansing there would be too much color obfuscating the substance.

    [–]17 Endorsed Contributortrudatness 16 points17 points  (4 children)

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    My sister in law - who is a fantastic woman - beautiful, professionally accomplished and a mother of two - an adult by anyone's definition - accidentally cut her finger rather deeply with a kitchen knife at my house about a month ago.

    She cried like a baby - not loud sobbing per se, but the tears were flowing big time.

    I was like You're crying...? Really...?

    She huffed at me I'm a girl!

    So yeah.

    [–]MichaelKeaton 6 points7 points  (3 children)

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    What I really don't get are the females who act his way (cry about the tiniest things) and then go on a tirade about how women are sooooo much stronger than men because childbirth hurr durr. By simply connecting the dots I'm going to have to assume that childbirth, while certainly painful, is probably not as painful as women make it out to be. Pretty much every female I've ever had a "who can tolerate more pain" argument with falls back to childbirth. EVEN IF the female involved in the argument hasn't even had a kid.

    [–]16 Endorsed ContributorGayLubeOil[S] 6 points7 points  (7 children)

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    So I guess a good manager would treat his female employees like children and help then deal with their emotions.

    [–]17 Endorsed Contributortrudatness 13 points14 points  (5 children)

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    I would suggest putting out a bowl of chocolates (without saying anything) at the time of the month where their menstrual cycles have synced to see if you could keep productivity constant.

    [–]The_Determinator 1 point2 points  (4 children)

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    You're on some fortune 500 shit with that one!

    [–]17 Endorsed Contributortrudatness 14 points15 points  (3 children)

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    Women are not all dipshits. I work with several very talented, bright, well accomplished professional ladies.

    But... I have seen some dipshits in my day.

    Back when I was waiter/bartender, there was this one woman I worked with who was in her 20s and had an affair with a man in his 60s who happened to be the FOH manager. He was said to be attractive for a 60 year old man, but he was still fucking 60 - likely equipped with a gray bush and old man balls.

    The company took good care of him - he drove a nice car and had a nice condo. He got cancer, unfortunately and died.

    This fucking cunt had him at her house while he was dying pushing papers in front of him to sign. The man's best friend was in Europe on vacation and somehow found out the situation and sent the head waiter over to the girls house. The head waiter kicked the door in - backhanded this bitch and took the dying man out of there and brought him to the hospital. His daughters were called and flew in just in time to be with him before he died.

    In the days there shortly afterwards, we saw the girl driving the man's car. She had it for the balance of the lease somehow - like 8 months.

    I've seen some shit in my time. I've seen women act terribly and without conscience - including my own ex wife. Woman can be the biggest fucking assholes imaginable. Nobody should automatically assume a woman is good by nature.

    [–][deleted]  (1 child)

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    [deleted]

      [–]17 Endorsed Contributortrudatness 3 points4 points  (0 children)

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      This is the kind shit that makes me laugh at white knights

      [–]The_Determinator 3 points4 points  (0 children)

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      Thirsty needy bitches man.

      If I didn't want to throw myself into the deep end of the "dating game" before, this subreddit has only helped...

      [–]Dexter77 1 point2 points  (2 children)

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      They also use it as a weapon. I have been twice in a situation where a female project manager has screwed up big time and when held accountable for the actions, instead of explaining them they have started to cry. At that point all the white knights have jumped to defend her and every mistake have been forgotten.

      [–][deleted]  (33 children)

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      [deleted]

        [–]16 Endorsed ContributorGayLubeOil[S] 17 points18 points  (8 children)

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        No, his post doesn't have kitties!

        [–]17 Endorsed Contributortrudatness 16 points17 points  (0 children)

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        Your posts always seem to skillfully use humor to slice deeply into common misconceptions and reveal uncomfortable truth.

        If a woman refuses to accept agency of her own condition, then what other option do you have, but to treat her like a child?

        [–]christiefrontdrive 7 points8 points  (6 children)

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        Don't feel bad /u/GayLubeOil, you're like one of my top 7 favorite people of all-time. You're up there with Bill Burr, Dale Earnhardt, Erica Campbell, whoever invented cigarettes, and I guess like 2 other people I also find awesome.

        [–]16 Endorsed ContributorGayLubeOil[S] 3 points4 points  (1 child)

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        Thanks man. Im not realy upset I was just having a laugh.

        [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (3 children)

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        Some Turk or Russian invented cigarettes by using old newspaper to roll tobacco rather than making a cigarillo or smoking a pipe. Brits picked it up in the Crimean war. It'd be easier to make Sir Walter Raleigh a favorite. If not him, Jean Nicot.

        [–]Ish_the_Stomach 1 point2 points  (2 children)

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        look up the zig zag man on wikipedia... just sayin.

        [–]Endorsed ContributorUsherai 1 point2 points  (17 children)

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        No, women generally ARE children who are limited by their feels. Being governed by emotion and lacking responsibility is why they are children. A man can develop their strengths and rein in their weaknesses by giving them stability to hold on to. Without that they are like a ship with no anchor.

        Notice that the wife was only able to recognize her problems and address them because her rp husband guided her. Women aren't doomed to remain children, but left to their own devices they will. Even the strengths of women, stemming from their emotional nature, although great and unique to them are reliant upon a masculine force to direct them properly.

        The ideal thing would be that their fathers helped them develop past the point of a child, but in lieu of that a husband can, if she isn't too damaged. Still the fact is that 90% of women you'll deal with are still extremely childish to the point that you literally cannot treat them like adults to any positive effect.

        [–]17 Endorsed Contributortrudatness 4 points5 points  (3 children)

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        I think that when women believe the hype streamed into their collective conscience by feminists - that they are all victims of the cosmic forces of the patriarchy - then the effect is definitely counter-productive to what the stated goals of feminism are.

        I think it's more accurate to say that it is 100% possible for women to be as high achieving as men, but only if they shed their victim identities.

        The transcendent revelation doesn't necessarily have to come from an RP husband or other related male influence. I personally believe it is well within a woman's capabilities to see through the shit going on all around them within their sphere of influences.

        The question is do they - or will they? Not without the right primers.

        It all depends what a woman truly wants out of life. Does she want to rigidly cling to the safety net of victimhood? Or does she want to shed that in favor of self-reliance? That seems directly related to the individual talents of the woman and her level of personal ambition.

        A good % of women seem insistant on pushing forth the message of perpetual victimhood. After all, getting tax free money every month and retaining the ability to torch the people they don't like with unsubstantiated accusations are privileges women have become accustomed to having - not to mention the inherent perks of hypergamy. Why would they want to knowingly give those things up? Those things reduce the overall difficulty of life. They probably wouldn't advocate true egalitarianism (not bullshit feminist defined egalitarianism) unless it was in their immediate personal interests.

        When anyone lives life with a victim complex and amplifies the effect of it by being egocentric - then by definition they refuse to accept responsibility for their condition and think only of themselves. It's very easy to compare this type of behavior to that of a child.

        Any person of any gender can fall into the trap of this mindset - it's not restrictive to women. I think that it just so happens that the present day cultural definition of "The gender struggle" funnels women into these perceptual sets. It's only when women truly discover that this kind of thing holds them back do they abandon it. Many women are quite content to live life with their established privileges. In fact, they seem to enjoy the privileges they have so much that they want to increase them - not remove them.

        If that's the case, then so be it... Until feminism changes it's tune, and stops trying to continually leverage victimhood for advancing privilege, they are going to continue wear the Evil TeenagerTM identity and not be taken seriously by their male peers.

        The good news is that if they choose to drop the bullshit victim act, men are generally pretty receptive.

        [–]Endorsed ContributorUsherai 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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        I think this is mostly accurate. I disagree that it is

        100% possible for women to be as high achieving as men

        There are limitations on them because of how much their emotions impact their judgement. Granted many men have this same issue, but overcoming it is easier for men.

        [–]NikolaTeslaMGTOW 7 points8 points  (7 children)

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        If we as men are going to neg comments can we at least have the decency to voice why we dislike this opinion. This was at -1 and I am curious as to why it was negged. Im sure we all would like to hear different opinions and gain insight, this is the red pill. We are here to learn. I see nothing wrong with this comment at first glance. If you have issue can you please explain why for our edification? I am not being facetious and am genuinely interested in different opinions if they are sound.

        [–]BooksofMagic 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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        Reddit fudges the numbers on purpose so -1 on a comment could just be reddit doing it's thing. The other option is - downvoting brigades from other subs happen.

        No need to worry about it - just upvote what you think is good material.

        [–]1iluminatiNYC 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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        Thank you for this, and thanks to trudatness for the original comment. Women tend to be at their best and in their comfort zone when they aren't directly going for a goal but more setting patterns and developing relationships. If you want to be cold and logical about it (and in a way that would tick off ~95% of the women in the world if you told them like this), that is what mothering and nurturing requires. You don't just feed and clothe a kid like a machine. You talk to children, interact with them, create an environment where they can grow.

        Likewise, in the workforce, women tend to be better at developing relationships and creating the patterns needed for long-term success. In trudatness' wife's case, she was trying to develop a relationship with a dude who just wanted a job done. Once she was able to understand what the deal was, life became a lot easier for her, and she was able to connect on the man's level. In a way, she took the red pill about how men truly communicate, and got results that way. It isn't that women aren't intelligent as much as they don't understand that their main mode of thinking isn't always the best way for all situations. Tools for the job, my friends...

        [–]monsieurhire2 4 points5 points  (0 children)

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        Very well written post; I agreed with much of what you've said, and I know many women like that. Unfortunately, they are an outlier.

        As you said, "then again, my wife is probably more pragmatic than most."

        To work the professional field, you have to internalize a certain mindset traditionally reserved for men, but adoptable by women. Your wife had mostly adopted that mindset, but was struggling with a few issues. To be fair, plenty of men have similar issues. I know I hated being shat on at work, and would let it get to me, until finally I figured out to just do the job until I could get a better one.

        [–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

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        Kudos on your post. You elucidated not only how many women feel and think but the way it impacts how they manage aspects of their lives.

        While you used your wife's (PERCEIVED) situation at work that same example can be applied to how women handle themselves in personal relationships. This is where feminism has failed us women. How to not take things personally and focus on the positives of being a woman is not the message. Instead we are taught that we are just like men, if not better, but that we are also the victims of men. It's a messy lesson plan and not pro woman at all when you think about it.

        *Side note: you mentioned your wife's pragmatism and that's important. Your advice sunk in because of it. If a man is dealing with a BSC woman the results may not have been as successful. I know this because a lot of my BSC friends don't get it.

        [–][deleted]  (1 child)

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          [–]17 Endorsed Contributortrudatness 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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          +accept

          [–]slavetothought 1 point2 points  (1 child)

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          Thank you. I've been following this subreddit for months and this is the first bit of content I've felt comfortable with upvoting. I've been waiting for a long time for the red pill to take this sort of shift in attitude and am hoping the attention you're receiving will be what allows us to actually reach the other side of the pond that we are so very frustrated with. Stay true buddy and congrats to your wife for respecting you as an individual.

          [–]17 Endorsed Contributortrudatness 4 points5 points  (0 children)

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          Well saying that women are all stupid and incapable won't pass any test of logical proof.

          That doesn't mean that women don't exhibit common behaviors and carry common beliefs.

          I won't lie - it's somewhat rewarding to point out that some of these common traits that women refuse to admonish are the very things that hold them back.

          What's even more crazy is that gender activists claim that a mystical force called the Patriarchy is the root cause of all their difficulties.

          Women are now fully integrated into the same rat race men are (and have been for some time now). They can do whatever or be whatever they choose. The only things holding them back are their own lack of will and ability on an individual level - which holds mirror true for men.

          However, women still expect special exceptions and privilege and yet somehow are angry they are not getting enough. The folly of it is difficult to conceptualize. Often it seems the final goal for gender activists is for women to all receive monthly checks from former lovers while retaining the ability to jail and slander them arbitrarily. I'd like to say that's a parody of reality - but it is not.

          Having agency means having personal responsibility over one's own condition. Women claim to not have agency. They say they are victims. They do it because they want to use guilt as a means to increase their privilege.

          I, for one, can't accept that as intellectually coherent.

          Man or woman we all experience fulfillment from our achievements. It just seems like a more healthy way of engaging life than throwing a tantrum and getting people to give you shit you don't deserve.

          [–]Endorsed ContributorRedPillDad 10 points11 points  (10 children)

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          She had firmly planted in her head this victim complex, that every person she dealt with in these male dominated circles had a bias against her because she was a woman.

          Brilliant stuff. Most women have little capacity or desire to truly lead.

          [–]17 Endorsed Contributortrudatness 22 points23 points  (1 child)

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          Some do want the challenge. They want to get that satisfaction from being successful and continue to progress in their careers.

          However, it's difficult to do that if you constantly think that you're a victim. You're not going to earn the trust of your peers if you are constantly whining with egocentric obsession. Nobody is going to trust that the best interests of the business case are going to be prioritized.

          [–]SgtSplacker 9 points10 points  (0 children)

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          Something that has not been mentioned yet... If my managers heard me spew some everyone is against me nonsense they would completely lose faith in me as a person and my work. And we all know this is on the forefront of most women's thoughts. It's the racism/sexism itself that holds so many back.

          [–][deleted] 5 points6 points  (7 children)

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          I experience this on a daily basis. My "boss" is a young woman. She is not the most qualified and is only in the job because the previous department head passed away while she was the assistant. I have a good 4 years work and much more life experience on her.

          I am definitely the leader of the department, frequently telling her the correct way to get things done. She doesn't seem to play the victim, but she does just coast through it all. I'm going to try and make a play for the department head.

          [–]widec 7 points8 points  (6 children)

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          Don't make a play right away, stop advising her, and if she's really a bad manager the whole department will go to hell quick. At that point you can easily step up and dethrone her.

          [–]Enphuego 11 points12 points  (2 children)

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          If he makes her look great, his team will do really well which is good for promotions all around. She'll know that he is indispensable and will be frightened to lose him so she'll be forced to be closely allied with him. If she gets promoted, he'll have an easy time getting her job. If he wants a raise, she won't have much of a choice. If she jumps ship to some other company, he'll probably get her job and an offer from her new company.

          OP's going to need to ditch the chip on his shoulder and show the pragmatism expressed above. She may be less qualified, but correcting her is always going to be a mistake. Even if she's less qualified at the actual job, she may be able to use her skills with people to push him right out of the job if he is deemed a threat.

          The other option of letting her fall flat is a risky gamble that can backfire in a lot of ways.

          [–]dman8000 2 points3 points  (0 children)

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          It depends on his office environment and her competence. Some employers will see that the department is doing decently(but not great) thanks to his competence canceling out with her incompetence. They will just leave things as they are.

          Generally, I would suggest doing your job well and helping out when asked, but if your boss makes dumb decisions, let her.

          [–]NikolaTeslaMGTOW 4 points5 points  (0 children)

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          Never outshine the master. Laws of Power #1

          http://48laws-of-power.blogspot.ca/2013/10/law-1-never-outshine-master.html

          Always make those above you feel comfortably superior. In your desire to please or impress them, do not go too far in displaying your talents or you might accomplish the opposite – inspire fear and insecurity. Make your masters appear more brilliant than they are and you will attain the heights of power

          [–]Goupidan 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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          Now what do you mean with agency?

          [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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          This needs to be it's own post, it's superb.

          [–]SupALupRT 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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          good reply

          [–]BluepillProfessor 14 points15 points  (2 children)

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          My wife is a lawyer with an exclusive service contract with a huge company for about $12,000 -$14,000 profit each month.

          But....

          Often she will come home just needing to tell a long ridiculous story that has nothing to do with anything. Before TRP I had no idea how to handle this. I would try to handle each situation as she spoke of them and she would get more and more pissed off. Now when she gets like that I order her to "come here" and then hug her like I am consoling a little girl while she prattles on about nothing, really. I just listen while she rattles on about random everyday encounters into which she has read deep meaning. It is actually a very nice, warm fuzzy, for both of us, I think. When she has exhausted herself I give her a kiss, a strong hug, then I order her to not worry about it, and promise that everything is going to be fine. You handled it just fine.

          Yep, kind of like you would for a tantrum throwing 6 y/o. Right down to patting her on the shoulder as you leave as a final reassurance. OP has a point.

          [–][deleted] 33 points34 points  (14 children)

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          Most feels that women can't handle without you stepping in can be whittled down to a useful acronym: HALTS.

          Hungry

          Angry

          Lonely

          Tired

          Sad

          As /u/gaylubeoil presented in his example with the greek yogurt and impromptu stroll, when you correctly read her emotions you can act accordingly.

          [–]16 Endorsed ContributorGayLubeOil[S] 69 points70 points  (13 children)

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          The reason I used Greek Yogurt as an example is that its high in Iron. A surprising number of women are anemic which means they bruise easily. Its obviusly not your fault that she cant get enough nutrients into her body. However You don't want to be seen walking around with a bruised woman. Which is why GayLubeOil recommends feeding your anemic woman Greek Yogurt mixed with pomegranate so you don't look like an abusive asshole. If you are an abusive asshole yogurt and pomegranate will not fix or prevent hemotoma. Sorry abusive assholes.

          [–]dontmovedontmoveahhh 22 points23 points  (9 children)

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          Greek Yogurt isn't a good source of iron because it contains nonheme iron, only 5% of which is absorbed and also because high calcium foods interfere with the absorption of iron. The only source of heme iron which is more readily absorbed is meat, mollusks are the highest in iron and beef is preferable to chicken or fish.

          [–]16 Endorsed ContributorGayLubeOil[S] 14 points15 points  (1 child)

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          this is good info. Get your mollusk inside that anemic bitch.

          [–]TfahsNoriEht 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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          Suckling on gym weights has the same effect. Plus it boosts your immune system.

          [–]2Red_August 4 points5 points  (0 children)

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          As long as you cut it in little pieces for them

          [–]Endorsed Contributoraaron_the_just 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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          Perhaps when GLO says "yoghurt" he's preferring to a rather manlier, more human variety.

          [–][deleted] 21 points22 points  (1 child)

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          Sorry abusive assholes.

          lmfao

          [–]robesta 58 points59 points  (10 children)

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          GLO,

          Great post.

          My girl and I were driving to Muy Thai Wednesday night and she seemed really stressed out from work. I decided that rather than ask her about her shitty, boring day, I'd just talk about whatever the fuck I wanted to and have fun and tickle her. Within 2 minutes she forgot about work and was in a great mood. Basically, I shared my fun life with her and it let her leave her own boring life.

          TL;DR- If a woman wanted a serious conversa..... Women don't want serious conversations.

          [–]christiefrontdrive 17 points18 points  (3 children)

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          Man, that made me laugh. Reminded me of my last LTR, we'd go to a fancy sub shop once or twice a week for some grub. We were sitting at a table in there one time and she was all stressed out, blabbering on about work and at the two-minute point I realized she wasn't going to stop any time soon, so almost instinctively I picked up her meatball sub and stuffed the end in her mouth. So she ate a bite and said "Ungh I love eating here" and was happy the rest of the night.

          [–]FindMitch 7 points8 points  (0 children)

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          "There, there honey." *Hug her. Daddy's gotta run some errands but if you tag along, maybe we'll pick you up an ice cream.

          girl: "OooOOk," in the highest most girly voice.

          stuff like this works more than you think when she's having a shit day.

          [–]robesta 2 points3 points  (0 children)

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          Here baby, have some of my happy meatball sub frame and chill the fuck out!

          [–][deleted]  (5 children)

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          [deleted]

            [–]robesta 26 points27 points  (4 children)

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            You're absolutely right. We provide them with something they can never have on their own or through other women. I know a few lesbian couples and they always seem to have this lean on each other dynamic that looks exhausting for the both of them.

            At the end of the day, most women want to turn off all semblance of authority they brought home from work, have a man take charge and fuck them until they see stars.

            [–]Endorsed Contributoraaron_the_just 5 points6 points  (2 children)

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            Most stable lesbian couples I know have one partner who essentially IS a man.

            [–]1ThumpNuts 37 points38 points  (34 children)

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            This! This is probably my greatest 'secret' to my success... in relationships anyway. For example: If my wife is being a bitch, I immediately tell her to go eat a banana because she's hungry and it'll put her in a better mood. It's my go to move. If she's getting bitchy with me in the car I have even pulled over in a drive through to get her a chocolate shake and completely dismiss whatever the fuck she was complaining about.

            BUT... this has given me an idea! What if I approach all women this way. What if I treat all women [co-workers, acquaintances, my wife's friends, in-laws, hook-ups] like if I was dealing with children?

            This will be a fascinating experiment.

            [–]dvrzero 35 points36 points  (1 child)

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            Better stock up on condoms. Just in case.

            [–][deleted]  (5 children)

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            [deleted]

              [–]16 Endorsed ContributorGayLubeOil[S] 30 points31 points  (3 children)

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              I always try to feed her wholesome foods. You don't want her to be bitchy and fat lol.

              [–]The_Floating_Dick 34 points35 points  (2 children)

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              "But you never listen to meee!!"

              "Here, have some lentils"

              [–]VelociReactor 3 points4 points  (1 child)

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              Just keep a stash of lentils in your pocket, when the time comes, pull them out and throw them in her face.

              [–]baroncuttlefish 6 points7 points  (0 children)

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              POCKET SAND LENTILS

              [–]HeadingRed 2 points3 points  (1 child)

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              I keep a bowl of candy on my desk. In the drawer I have the serious stuff.

              [–]FugitiveAlpha 2 points3 points  (3 children)

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              If my wife is being a bitch, I immediately tell her to go eat a banana because she's hungry and it'll put her in a better mood.

              WHY DOES THIS ALWAYS WORK?!?!?!

              at first i thought my woman had a blood sugar problem that made her a cunt when it was low. but then it was every woman.... Are they genetically incapable of managing their blood sugar as well as men, or is it their self-serving bullshit that is so strong that her subconscious is a bitch when it doesn't get what it wants too?

              [–]1ThumpNuts 2 points3 points  (0 children)

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              I think it's a hormone thing. They generally have less control over their emotions, which effect their hormones and vice versa. Throw low blood sugar into the mix and they have stronger bitch forces and tendencies to deal with.

              I would equate it to a man on steroids. Hormones are out of whack so roid-rage.

              It may be as simple as that.

              [–]1FloranHunter 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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              Heh, this may explain why one of the more self-aware women I know thinks she has a blood sugar problem when it's incredibly unlikely. She's really just moody from hunger or perhaps lack of food-induced endorphins.

              [–]ATBlanchard 1 point2 points  (6 children)

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              You'll probably develop a pretty shitty reputation to be honest. You have to know how to pick your battles

              [–]1ThumpNuts 2 points3 points  (5 children)

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              Why? I don't treat children poorly. As a matter of fact, I'm great with kids.

              If I apply the same attitude and treatment to Adult women, it would be interesting to see if I get the same positive results I get from kids... wouldn't it?

              I haven't had a real opportunity to try yet [family emergencies recently], but I did try on my wife, mother-in law and sister-in law...

              1. I usually treat my wife this way anyway, so no real change there... but she did initiate sex last night - which she usually doesn't. Usually she doesn't have to because I initiate quite frequently.
              2. My mother-in law became more "chatty" with me. I usually entertain children by listening to what they have to say and give them the attention they seek. A lot of time, children just want to be heard and crave the attention. They're not looking for advice or problem solving. I usually don't have the patience to sit and listen to an adult rattle on about nothing [without me giving some kind of input that has value], but I treated her like I would a child and listened and humored her with questions and acted like I was interested, just to get her feeling good about herself. Later, she offered to babysit to give my wife and I a "date-night". Usually my wife asks her and if she can't find an excuse to say no, she will do it.
              3. My sister-in law... who is having problems with my brother which she is taking personally... I didn't treat her like a child at first [and I'm not going to get into detail here] but, then, I "scolded" her like a child. After "scolding" her she tried to change her story a bit but she later regressed into selfish arguments and defending herself, all the while just making herself look like a worse and worse person [not that my brother is "in the right" here, but he's not exactly "wrong"]. So, I'm wondering what would have happened if I treated her like a child from the beginning and kept treating her like a child. And, do I view her problems like the problems of a child? That's tricky.

              Anyway, now that I'm back home I'm going to put the experiment to the test with everyone... every chick I see - Coworkers, friends, family, Facebook, Clients - you name it.

              Caveat: This whole experiment could be entirely skewed because I realize that I treat children "better" than adults generally: I have more patience with children, I smile at children, I don't take children seriously, and I am very accommodating to children. On the other hand: I am quick to "correct" a child - in a very nice way. This could be viewed as me being condescending... we'll see.

              [–]Endorsed Contributoraaron_the_just 0 points1 point  (4 children)

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              You will go broke buying chocolate shakes for every woman complaining on Facebook.

              [–]1ThumpNuts 0 points1 point  (3 children)

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              LOL.

              I don't mean that. I do that for my wife, I wouldn't do that for every child, so I wouldn't do that for every [any] other woman.

              Good joke though.

              [–]Endorsed Contributoraaron_the_just 0 points1 point  (2 children)

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              This might sound funny, but putting a woman through a good, solid workout is good for her too. Try 10 minutes of intense aerobics.

              Or just have sex with her when she's overly cranky. That usually puts my ladies in a good mood.

              [–]1ThumpNuts 1 point2 points  (1 child)

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              True, but I don't feel particularly horny when a girl is being bitchy. I feel like they don't deserve my dick... where as I look at the chocolate shake or banana like medicine.

              [–]Endorsed Contributoraaron_the_just 2 points3 points  (0 children)

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              Fair enough. I tend to view some sex as a gift towards a woman. She's had a bad day... I'll console her with an orgasm.

              [–]16 Endorsed ContributorGayLubeOil[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

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              If you did this with everyone you would quickly become the UN food bank.

              [–]christiefrontdrive -1 points0 points  (7 children)

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              If you treat a 32-year old woman like she's 13, and you fuck her, does that make you ephebophilic?

              [–]1ThumpNuts 7 points8 points  (2 children)

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              If you treat a 32-year old woman like you would treat your best guy friend, does that make you a homo? Probably not.

              ...interesting concept though.

              [–]baroncuttlefish 3 points4 points  (1 child)

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              Would that make Feminism gay?

              [–]1ThumpNuts 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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              [–]Endorsed Contributoraaron_the_just 4 points5 points  (0 children)

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              No, but it's still hot when she calls you "daddy".

              [–]∞ Red Pill VisionaryRollo-Tomassi 14 points15 points  (1 child)

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              It's not about talking down to, or treating a woman like a child – that's patronization. It's much better to treat women with Amused Mastery. You avoid the patronization and maintain a superior frame:

              http://therationalmale.com/2012/09/14/amused-mastery/

              There’s a certain Alpha security dynamic at play between a woman and a Man who emits an ambient vibe of having been with enough women to be able to predict her shit tests, and then pass them with a casual roll of his eyes and a knowing smirk. When a man is giving off the cues of Amused Mastery theres an unspoken presumption by women that he “just gets it” when it comes to dealing with women.

              [–]17 Endorsed Contributortrudatness 5 points6 points  (0 children)

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              When you combine the knowledgeable supportive frame that defeats all challenges for authenticity with the tacit non-verbal queues of amused mastery - you run shit.

              [–]16 Endorsed ContributorCyralea 30 points31 points  (0 children)

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              This is also why you never take a woman's words seriously. If a child told you they think you're stupid, do you get into a staunch debate with them? No, you laugh it off, and possibly tease them about it.

              I almost wonder if women act like that specifically because that's how they were treated by their fathers growing up.

              [–]Doomsday_ 10 points11 points  (2 children)

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              As stupid as its sounds you can completely avoid a lot of arguments by ignoring everything she says and going for the underlying problem.

              Exactly. This is because most of what women say is the expression of how they feel at the time. That's why it's pointless to argue with them on the basis of logic or to try to address "issues" that they bring up.

              [–][deleted]  (1 child)

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              [deleted]

                [–]FugitiveAlpha 5 points6 points  (0 children)

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                To make it seriously obvious.

                The woman is pissed off because she's not eaten in a while, shes hungry and thats just no good in her mind.

                She starts a fight with you about some stupid little thing you said, or that she made up.

                Do you :

                A: argue about the dumb shit that she made up?

                B: Give her a fucking chocolate shake (TM) and watch her smile?

                Don't limit this to being hungry, they "feel" a certain way, but they usually aren't aware of it (happens to guys too) and they act out thinking that the emotion they are feeling is tied to this one thing or whatever. You know damned well it wasn't the guy that cut her off that has her this pissed off 5 hours later, so you address what realyl has her pissed off.

                [–]5hogun 3 points4 points  (0 children)

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                Lost me at "tenants".

                [–][deleted] 4 points5 points  (2 children)

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                My mind has not been blown like this for a while. Girl I know used that same term a week ago, a 'dick sucking situation.' Once again, if you didn't want to suck his dick, you probably shouldn't have sucked his dick. I didn't want to, so I didn't. I'm actually not sucking his dick right now, it's crazy how easy it is.

                [–]Endorsed ContributorUsherai 64 points65 points  (28 children)

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                For all the accusations of misogyny thrown at TRP, I don't think most guys, even here, go far enough. Women are exactly like children in that without strong male leadership they will ruin themselves by being slaves to their emotions and short-sightedness. Their inability to take responsibility for themselves means that men need to be the ones directing, influencing, and manipulating their emotions into beneficial behaviors and pursuits.

                This means that the mindset RP men should have in their relationships with women is one of complete and utter superiority. Your analysis and suggestions are pretty spot on.

                [–]16 Endorsed ContributorGayLubeOil[S] 89 points90 points  (15 children)

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                Even if someone is a blatant misogynist and thinks women are completely inferior to men, that doesn't necessarily translate into him treating women poorly. Lets say you had a special needs child . The kids obviously intellectually inferior, to you and his peers. You knowing this doesn't make you an asshole. Knowing this and admitting this is the first step in being a good parent for this kid. Yea maybe you have to wipe his mouth after he eats or pick up after him a bit more. But pretending that he is a totally normal kid is going to make you a shittier parent than admitting the truth. That's why you should do what men have done for most of human history:treat women like women instead of pretending that they are men with breasts.

                [–][deleted] 19 points20 points  (3 children)

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                misogyny isn't about superior/inferior. it's about a hatred of women as a group. this is a common misconception.

                [–]16 Endorsed ContributorDemonspawn 33 points34 points  (0 children)

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                But so much of the population has equality disease: thinking someone isn't equal must be coming from hate... because they are equal, don'tchaknow!

                [–]Endorsed ContributorUsherai -1 points0 points  (0 children)

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                I would say that it effectively means a belief in male superiority. The misconception is so prevalent that using it technically is problematic.

                [–]Endorsed ContributorUsherai 25 points26 points  (9 children)

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                This is a point that is often missed by detractors or left unsaid.

                I think women are great. They're fun, enticing, exciting, etc etc. I enjoy their company and like to treat them well. But they're fucking children. And just like children they can be spoiled, selfish assholes or they can be well-behaved, cool people. Men leading their women, for me at least, means that when you have to ignore their antics, or tell them to shut the fuck up, or punish them via dread/ignoring/whatever, it's not just to be an autocrat, but to develop them into a better partner for you, and a better person overall. Instilling proper behaviors and attitudes is beneficial for the woman and for you. It's really the only way to have a mutually happy, loving relationship with a girl, which for me is the main goal.

                [–]randomdude600 31 points32 points  (2 children)

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                When I first discovered the red-pill this attitude seemed harsh, but reading and looking at pussy-pass examples, feminist rants and observing women I know confirmed it.

                I've noticed from observing behavior that most women are 1) Incredibly naive 2) Hugely entitled 3) Nearly incapable of feeling personal responsibility or true lasting remorse for their actions.

                The "woman is the most responsible teenager in the house" is an apt metaphor. Teenagers constantly test the boundaries of their relationship with their parents, in the same way women constantly shit-test men, daring us to reign them in and loosing attraction if we don't.

                [–]2 Mredpillschool 23 points24 points  (1 child)

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                I agree entirely. It's not something you can just point to a study and show, but it's something that collectively, I think most men notice in their lifetimes. Women act without consideration for consequence. Well- let me rephrase, women act without consequence so often, that women act without consideration for it.

                That's why you have the wild-and-loose stereotype of a girl who wants to go do bad things for a rush- like get into trouble, or break in somewhere, or do something you're not supposed to do. She tells her somewhat-beta date that they should sneak into that building over there, and he goes "I don't know... maybe we shouldn't."

                She calls him a pussy so he goes for it.

                We have a culture of women who push men across the line for nothing more than gina tingles. That's what it is. They want a guy who brazenly cross the line, who aren't afraid of risk. And since if this hypothetical couple got caught- it would be the man who gets in trouble, she has nothing to lose. So she pushes, and so women push.

                Edit: This is a good recap on this from ROK a while back: http://www.returnofkings.com/2090/how-black-america-has-predicted-our-future

                [–][deleted] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

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                If someone is a blatant misogynist it pretty much does translate to him treating women badly, by definition. "Blatant" means to do something openly and unabashedly, and "misogyny" is the hatred or dislike of women. Being a blatant misogynist would virtually require you to treat women poorly.

                That being said, the archetype used for your original post is likely the reason people view this subreddit as sexist. The reason I point this out is because I imagine that it turns away many individuals from what otherwise could be helpful advice for them. I doubt you care much that some people are off put by your flippant rhetoric, nor should you necessarily. Though, I posit that this type of rhetoric is turning redpill theory into redpill dogma, which may in turn lower it's credibility extensively.

                [–]11999590430420 5 points6 points  (5 children)

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                I'm new here (man), and just wondering about some stuff. You say;

                exactly like children in that without strong male leadership they will ruin themselves by being slaves to their emotions and short-sightedness.

                Are you overgeneralizing, or do you guys believe that +95% of women really are like this? Cause while I agree with most things being written here, I know many women that are responsible and live alone, and are doing very well. Without a doubt, they are VERY dependent on their emotions, but would you say "ruin themselves" an overstatement when talking about ALL women?

                Please elaborate!

                [–]FugitiveAlpha 3 points4 points  (0 children)

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                The ones that don't ruin themselves probably had appropriate male guidance while growing up (their father wasn't a useless pussy)

                [–]Endorsed ContributorUsherai 5 points6 points  (2 children)

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                100% of women are like this without male guidance. Ideally that starts with their father.

                I say ruin themselves meaning that since they are so strongly influenced by their emotions they fall into negative patterns of thought and behavior that are reinforced by society, other women, and weak men. They are unable to rectify this on their own without either a proper upbringing or a strong man to steady the storm of their emotions.

                [–][deleted]  (1 child)

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                [deleted]

                  [–]sigmalays 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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                  i agree. it's maybe half of all women who (kinda) fit the stereotypes.

                  but the kind of women that are the easiest for TRP guys to meet and hook up with are part of that half.

                  [–]uton_gili 9 points10 points  (2 children)

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                  Sadly this sums up my marriage very well. I'm slowly moving into dominance, but it's not the way I was raised at all. My mother was very controlling and my father, for very good and well stated reasons that I believed for a long time, is passive-aggressive in response.

                  It's hard to leave the passive-aggressive vs angry cycle, and every time I do I get accused of being "patronizing" which I don't particularly want to be either. You can treat someone like a child without being patronizing, but it can be very dark and I dislike that for entirely different reasons.

                  But I'm getting over it, don't really have a choice any more.

                  Yes, I'm whining. Sue me.

                  [–]FinnianWhitefir 2 points3 points  (0 children)

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                  I find that the hardest part. You make a ton of progress, you relate to new people and strangers great, but all your old family and friends are still communication is unhealthy ways. Half of it is just leaving them behind and accepting that they are damaged with no interest in improving. Half of it is just being yourself, being confident, communicating openly and honestly, and letting them deal with it however they want.

                  Codependent No More talks a lot about the Rescuer > persecutor > Victim triangle and how those relationships like your parents move between them. It really helped me move out of those negative responses.

                  [–]FugitiveAlpha 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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                  It's OK to whine a little, it's hard (especially at first). But, it is indeed reality, and it's worth the work. Think about how "bad" life with your woman was compared to now (I'm assuming its gotten better). Once you get to where you need to be, things will be considerably better, and it'll be worth it, plus, it'll get easier as you get more accustomed to it.

                  [–]Blemish 4 points5 points  (0 children)

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                  Well this post was linked to /r/ShitRedditSays

                  Bear this in mind when reading replies

                  [–]TB12RR9 1 point2 points  (1 child)

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                  Not even trying to stir the pot here. But men too. Trust me I was raised by a single mother, she did the best she could but there is no replacing a strong male role model in you're life. Luckily I had some good uncles, cousins and teachers to look up to, and I could finally piece together a strong identity and a firm belief in myself.

                  [–]Peteriscoo69 12 points13 points  (2 children)

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                  This post is spot on! This reminds me of another comment I read a while ago about what women do when they're caught shoplifting. It's from a deleted account that what posting on this video.

                  Dealing with shoplifters has been my gig for the past 6 years. Everywhere from the ghetto to the upper class suburbs, Walmart to Macy's. I'm not sure how exactly this would apply to RP theory, I'm sure someone else who is smarter about it would know more. But chicks shoplift all the fucking time, probably 2x as much as men. Now, the sheer number of female shoplifters can definitely be attributed to the fact that they have way more opportunity. They make up a larger percent of the shoppers, by nature almost all of them carry purses (this one is huge, it is for sure the main reason why there are more women shoplifters, men simply don't have the means to conceal clothing items/anything bulky), and they are often times simply bored from being at home all day.

                  Chicks though. Jesus fucking Christ. Any time I'm going to be approaching a female I know here is going to be bullshit. They cannot stand being accused of anything, how dare I. A chick could spend an hour walking around a store, tearing open packages, stuffing shampoo bottles in her snatch, but the second I approach and attempt to get my merchandise back, you'd think I just asked her if she rapes dogs. They play games, try to convince you that you're wrong, they play the flat out denial game. Seriously, they'll just say "I didn't take shit" over and over again as they walk to their car. And once I finally get them to break down and comply (it's an art form), the water works inevitably start. "My ex stopped paying and my daughter needs clothes" "this is my first time ever doing anything like this" (it literally never is) "why are YOU doing this to me". And after all the rationalization, they are shocked when there are real consequences (arrest/fines) and I usually get to see them spin the same shit on the cops when they show up.

                  Here's where it gets interesting though, there's another group that acts this way, children. When I have to apprehend a child, the consequences don't seem real to them, they think that they can get out of it by denying it as hard as they can, and they rationalize the shit out of the act.

                  [–]Endorsed Contributoraaron_the_just 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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                  I remember being a child. Lying to get out of stuff seemed to make sense and it felt very unjust when I'd get caught.

                  Eventually I grew up, because real life kept punching me in the nose.

                  [–]libglip 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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                  |Here's where it gets interesting though, there's another group that acts this way, children. When I have to apprehend a child, the consequences don't seem real to them, they think that they can get out of it by denying it as hard as they can, and they rationalize the shit out of the act.

                  I think you just described about 80% of politicians.

                  [–]Jessie_James 13 points14 points  (4 children)

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                  Aww is she hungry. She gets this way when shes hungry.

                  I can't tell you how spot on you are about this. My wife is great most of the time, but when things start going wrong I ask her when she ate last. I am constantly dismayed to discover she has eaten nothing, and it's 4 in the afternoon!

                  My 19 month old son also is the exact same way. If he's being fussy or upset, he also has not eaten (enough).

                  Feed them both, and things get back to normal. Some days I just can't believe it.

                  [–][deleted]  (2 children)

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                  [deleted]

                    [–]autourbanbot 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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                    Here's the Urban Dictionary definition of Hangry :


                    When you are so hungry that your lack of food causes you to become angry, frustrated or both.

                    An amalgum of hungry and angry invented to describe that feeling when you get when you are out at a restaurant and have been waiting over an hour to get the meal that you have ordered.


                    "Damn! Where is that steak I ordered? We've been waiting for an hour and a half here. The service here is terrible! I'm starving! I don't know about you, but I'm starting to feel really hangry!"


                    about | flag for glitch | Summon: urbanbot, what is something?

                    [–]Jessie_James 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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                    That's perfect!

                    [–]Endorsed Contributoraaron_the_just 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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                    Shocking - sometimes when a plate is whinging on and on, I'll ask if she had breakfast or lunch, and the answer is "no" on both counts.

                    Usually she has a headache too. Often from lack of hydration / electrolytes!

                    Men, feed your women.

                    [–]tedted8888 2 points3 points  (9 children)

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                    Can someone define "agency"? I have never heard it in this context, and dictionary.com doesn't help.

                    [–]16 Endorsed ContributorGayLubeOil[S] 4 points5 points  (5 children)

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                    Agency is the belief that you are responsible for what happens to you. You can say I was late because I failed to leave at the appropriate time and prepare accordingly. That is an acknowledgment of fault and agency. Likewise you can say I was late because there was a lot of traffic and I just wasnt lucky today. That is a lack of agency.

                    [–]tedted8888 1 point2 points  (4 children)

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                    I guess I would call that "responsibility" rather than agency. I'm an american from the northwest. Are you from Australia or another English speaking country? I'm curious since this you and some others on this sub are using this word in a fashion I am unfamiliar with. Perhaps this is just specific lingo from this sub?

                    [–]Endorsed Contributoraaron_the_just 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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                    "Agency" is an academic term used by philosophers across English speaking countries.

                    [–]Epicureanist 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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                    Agency is a more specific term, often used in philosophy when discussing free will, human choice ,etc, while responsibility is more often used with morality (culpability).

                    [–]16 Endorsed ContributorGayLubeOil[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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                    Its sub specific. Also im in law school so IDK?

                    [–]gg_s 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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                    Agency is ownership of one's own outcome. People who lack agency believe their missteps and shortcomings are caused by external factors: fate, misfortune, patriarchy, planetary alignment, etc. It is responsibility specifically for oneself.

                    [–]VelociReactor 0 points1 point  (2 children)

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                    Guys why are we down-voting him? He's asking an honest question.

                    [–]randomkloud 2 points3 points  (0 children)

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                    downvotes on trp have little meaning.

                    [–]tedted8888 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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                    fwiw, the mods should ad "agency" to the glossary of terms.

                    [–][deleted]  (9 children)

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                    [deleted]

                      [–]16 Endorsed ContributorGayLubeOil[S] 6 points7 points  (8 children)

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                      Children are not capable of debate. When a child is upset they start name calling. It realy doesn't matter what bluepill says. Their actions prove my theories.

                      [–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (6 children)

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                      Your analysis of women isn't wrong. But it's important to note that many men are the same way. Only the helpless feelings are substituted with an immediate resort to violence or uncalled for physical threats.

                      I think more carefully worded phrase would be that deep undercurrents for women, and men, are functions of base biological desire. For both sexes this includes hunger, anxiety, lack of sleep, and other principal components. For women this often results in an inability to think as logically and critically as a man in a similar scenario, and as a result taking a heavy handed approach towards their care is best (e.g. I'm going to take you to eat at XYZ because you're hungry now. Vs. Where do you want to eat dinner tonight?)

                      With men there are different issues, such as responding to stressful situations with anger and violence. Or being blinded by rage and unable to make rational choices. This is often remedied by working out or exerting energy. During this process the logical skills of men do not drop as much, but their desires can cause them to focus on very very short term goals (how do I logically/strategically fuck my crazy ex, beat the shit out of this guy, and so forth).

                      I'm also not suggesting each is as bad as the other, nor am I suggesting your omission of this fact is the same as suggesting men are all perfect. I just wanted to add the other side of the coin.

                      For example a womens red pill might be "When men are extremely upset/angry try to calm them down, and then just leave them alone. Men can be like animals in states of high sexual/physical arousal, and you will have little chance of convincing them to refocus their view until they calm down."

                      [–]16 Endorsed ContributorGayLubeOil[S] 1 point2 points  (2 children)

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                      Thats cool but I dont have to deal with men's shit cuz im not trying to fuck them.

                      [–][deleted] 6 points7 points  (1 child)

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                      That's strange. I didn't realize that the only time you ever could have a conflict with a man is when you're trying to fuck him.

                      But without a level headed understanding of how genders differ, and our own shortfalls, we risk becoming solipsistic ourselves.

                      [–]Endorsed Contributoraaron_the_just 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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                      Men who try to act like this quickly get a beatdown. Men have social cues and ways of interacting that quickly remove this behaviour from the herd.

                      Whereas a woman is indeed SUPPOSED to act this way.

                      [–]RPtooLate 0 points1 point  (1 child)

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                      Only the helpless feelings are substituted with an immediate resort to violence or uncalled for physical threats.

                      I believe the helpless feelings in women are due to "appeal to authority" possibly being their primary weapon. Whether or not a man would want to fight would probably depend on if he felt his fists were his "primary weapon" at the moment, but it could also be social or political.

                      [–]17 Endorsed Contributortrudatness 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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                      No amount of fact driven, exemplified wisdom stands in the way of their right to be victims I suppose.

                      [–]Lokikong 2 points3 points  (11 children)

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                      One thing I did was date a woman too far away and I did too much for her while receiving too little. I ended up kinda of melting down from a lack of not taking good care of myself and tried to ask for her attention instead of just taking it or putting the situation in my favor. Lack of sleep, excess stress and getting to caught up in her made me act like a beta and she lost all interest in me.

                      It's a shame but there is a huge double standard on this where men must always provide themselves with accountability even when it would be normally viewed to crack a little bit. Women will never be able to empathize with a worn down dude, it's best to just excuse yourself from their presence and cancel a date rather then show a weak side of you.

                      [–]Lokikong 5 points6 points  (1 child)

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                      Like seriously I had her eating out of the palm of my hand she loved everything about me until I went into to beta mode once from not loving myself and done she didn't want to talk to me again. Maybe later down the road I'll get a chance with her again but for now lesson learned. Time to be alpha as fuck and keep up with the self improvement.

                      [–]FugitiveAlpha 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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                      Nearly exactly same thing happened to me. The only difference is that i was aware of what i had to do, but she was going to move in with me and bring her son, so i was more accommodating than i should have been because i was trying to prepare for him. Otherwise, it was nearly the exact same situation..

                      [–]rebuildingMyself 1 point2 points  (3 children)

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                      Believe me I know the feeling. Had a really stressful month last month. Had very little support from my LTR. Despite knowing I was having a rough month, she only added to my stress by ramping up the bitchiness, not talking to me as much, definitely not going out of her way to comfort or calm me down after a bad day. And women are supposed to be the sympathetic ones, right?

                      [–]Lokikong 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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                      Yeah I know right? But it is nice we are talking again after a break. I'm just not sure how to put the cards in my favor.

                      [–]BluepillProfessor 0 points1 point  (1 child)

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                      She ramped up the bitchiness because you lost your frame. Night....Day. Ya canna change the laws of physics.

                      [–]rebuildingMyself 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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                      Lesson learned, brother. It looks like March will be as or more stressful than Feb. Not letting it fuck my frame up this time.

                      [–][deleted]  (4 children)

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                      [deleted]

                        [–]Lokikong 1 point2 points  (3 children)

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                        Yeah I put myself out of focus. I'm working on myself right now because she is still interested in me but is kinda of put a little bit. She is liking a lot of my fb posts and status' but I'm having a hard time trying to communicate with her. I got put in the wrong mindset where I'm to emotional and girls like it when you can connect to their emotions but not if you are expressing more emotions or bad emotions in a way she can't understand. It's time to be a man and take my problems for my own but also I need to stand out in the things I excel at and not worry about other opinions so much, especially hers. The attraction is still real and I feel it, I just have to figure out how to turn things around in my favor and in my terms more or less. Also patience with scheduling and taking it a day at a time. I have plenty of other things that I can work on to improve me self worth.

                        Edit: So update on my recent venture in the 'game'(as some like to call it), I had a bit of a falling out and I realized what I did wrong and what I could've done but I over apologized and she shut me out. Realizing I was only pushing her away, I stayed away. It sucked really bad knowing I hurt her and hurt even more that she was ignoring me but acting desperate, weak, and pleading only made everything worse and made her more repulsed. I turned things around and told her that I didn't have any need to talk to her and waited a week. She hit me up and we started talking fine but I ended up trying to do too much and things are a little standoffish. I figure if I stay aloof yet active this will melt away and she come back to me through her attraction for me.

                        [–]2 Mredpillschool 8 points9 points  (3 children)

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                        God damned man, great refresher. Bring on the trolls.

                        [–]watersign 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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                        part of me running game on girls is talking to them like little kids..which most of them are

                        [–]W-Z-R 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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                        The practical application is great

                        Women enjoy being treated as children so much; you just don't say tell them this is what you are doing

                        lol

                        [–]2lightfire409 6 points7 points  (0 children)

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                        Before everyone cries about how misogynist this is, do you hate children? Why do you think comparing women to children means we hate them? To see the female gender as less emotionally stable is not hateful or spiteful, but an act of observation. Its certainly sexist, i'll concede that!

                        Its a good observation gaylubeoil, and a reminder to not take women at face value, and dig a little deeper into their behavior patterns.

                        [–]MrMagwitch 4 points5 points  (5 children)

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                        .

                        [–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (1 child)

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                        What the fuck? That's all I have to say.

                        [–]rumo_itaki 1 point2 points  (4 children)

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                        Women don't realy believe in their own agency. That's why they often believe in cosmic forces like fate and patriarchy, because nothing they ever do is their fault.

                        Please elaborate.

                        [–]Endorsed Contributoraaron_the_just 4 points5 points  (3 children)

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                        I didn't get that promotion = male bias in workplace

                        I'm broke = wage gap

                        Can't find a job = society doesn't value feminine occupations

                        Single mom = the dad is a deadbeat for not sticking around

                        Sucked 37 dicks = was in 37 dick-sucking situations outside of her control

                        Boyfriend is cheating = boyfriend's fault for being an asshole

                        She is cheating = boyfriend's fault for not keeping her from straying

                        [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

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                        I enjoyed reading this and I agree that it's an effective method of dealing with women in general. However, it's an effective method of dealing with most people. BPs and women and children and ignorant men. Everyone acts childish and can use some direction from someone better adjusted to the necessities of real life.

                        My problem is this: Treating them like children enables them to continue acting like children. If you believe women (and everyone else) are incapable of acting like adults then, by all means, continue treating them like children. But, if you believe women are just as capable as men of acting with agency and objectivity, as I do, then it's ok to treat them like children when they're children. But when they're adults, it's time to get treated like an adult. There's no sense in coddling a man in his 40s and pretending it's ok for him not to have a job and support himself. It ruins him to believe he should be provided for in any way by anyone else. Women should be treated equally in this way.

                        It's cute to talk about equality and real life gender differences. I'm happy to say I think I see more reality today than ever before. And the reality is that women are NOT children. Treating them as such is reinforcing the behaviors that make them ACT as such. i.e. this is why we're at this point in the first place. You can't treat someone like a child and expect them not to act like a child. This is a fundamental truth about people: If you're treated like X long enough you will act like X. The whole world already treats women like children. This is why we are here. Cut the shit and push the women in your life to grow up.

                        Trudatness' reply is a pretty decent example of showing a woman how the real world works and taking away the excuses she might want to fall back on for her ineptitude. Don't fall into the trap of thinking that this was simply treating her like a child and everything working out for the better. This is an example of treating her like an adult (or "like a man" if you prefer) and her living up to the expectations we (men) have for other adults. Good for him but more importantly good for her.

                        By treating women like children so you don't have to put up with their shit is the same thing feminists do. You're degrading someone else so that you don't feel belittled. Cut it out. You're supposed to be better than that.

                        [–]real-boethius 4 points5 points  (0 children)

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                        OK you go and save the world. The rest of us will deal with things the way they are.

                        In a relationship, after a while, women get the message that their tantrums and BS are not going to get them anywhere. But even so, they do need the reassurance that there is someone else (you) who is not going to get swept away in the whirlpool of emotion that is their mind.

                        [–]Endorsed ContributorDoxasticPoo 3 points4 points  (6 children)

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                        Another reason to treat them like a child, woman want the love of a father.

                        So if you love her like a father, that means you're treating her like a child.

                        [–]iluvspirit21419 6 points7 points  (4 children)

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                        ^ Okay, everyone, this right here? This right here is what we call bullshit, kids. Repeat after me: bull-shit.

                        I'm a girl. Not a woman perhaps, seeing as I'm still a teenager, but I can fucking assure you that we do not want "the love of a father" from our spouses/sexual partners/significant others.

                        That's nothing of what we want.

                        You know what we want?

                        We want our partners to be our partner.

                        Not our father. Not our mother. Our partner. We want someone who will be there for us through thick and thin. We want someone who will listen to us rant at the end of a long work day. We want someone who will help decorate our child's room. We want someone who will kiss our cheek when they wake in the morning or if we're feeling under the weather will bring us some toast and a cup of warm coffee.

                        We want someone who will be there for us. Who will root for us to win during the marathon we've trained months, if not years for. We want someone who will love us. Not the love of a father. No love tops the love of a parent. But we do want someone who will be there like a parent. Not someone who will act like one or take up the duty of one.

                        What we want is someone to cry with after finding out someone close to us is sick. We want someone who will hold us and kiss our forehead and tell us everything is going to be alright, even when it isn't. We want someone to sit at our bedside with us while our baby is being wrapped up in a warm blanket by a nurse.

                        We don't want anything more than someone who will always be by our side. Someone who we can tell everything to. About how our coworker Nancy was being a total snob to her "friend" and how we stuck up for her and gave her the lashing of a lifetime. About how we stuck our foot in our mouth when we complimented another coworker on her lost weight and learned she'd had a miscarriage.

                        We want someone who will be the father of our children, if we do ever have any, and will read our children bedtime stories and meet us out in the hall so we can walk back to our bedroom with a light kiss and holding hands.

                        Most of us don't want someone who will pin us up against a wall for our first time, whether we're still a virgin or not. We want someone who will take it slow and be gentle and caring and kind and soothing and comforting. Not someone who'll jackhammer us into the bed.

                        We don't want boys who are immature or feel they have to overrank everyone and always play alpha. We don't want boys who will slam their fists or prop their elbows up on the table. We don't want boys who will get mad and punch a hole in the wall. We don't want boys who are reckless and smoke around children or flip elderly people the bird or wear big furred coats with their hats on backwards or sideways.

                        That's nothing of what we want.

                        You know what we want?

                        We want men. Not immature little pricks who drag race or drink and drive and post a photo to Facebook while doing it to prove they're "gangsta" or "cool."

                        We want men. We want someone who may or may not be okay with wearing a suit or tuxedo but knows to look decent enough for our wedding. We don't want stupid assholes who spit on people and act like little thugs with their pants hanging off their ass nearly to the ground.

                        We want men who are calm and collected. Who doesn't panic when things go sour. Who thinks before their actions and never hits women or children or even other men. Unless they started it. Then you finish it.

                        We don't want the people here. The people who believe all girls have Daddy issues and need a "fatherly figure" or who need "to be treated like children."

                        No, we're grown ass fucking adults and we will and most of us do act like it. Yes, I have Daddy problems. You know what that problem is? When I was nine I wanted a pony, just like every average little girl. I didn't get one. And you know what? I didn't live off other men and I still don't. I did chores around the house and got payed for it without asking. I got a job cleaning up the local park. I painted rocks for people who wanted yard decorations. I made art and sold it for about three dollars a piece. All this without any help from any so-called "men" like those here. And I'm solving that Daddy issue on my own. Know how? All that money that I got for my work is going towards buying a horse. I love my Daddy and he loves me and my parents are going to get married later this year after having been with each other for over 25 years.

                        So, no.

                        We do not want to be treated like a child.

                        We do not want someone who thinks they have to act like a father and scold us when we do something wrong.

                        We don't want the fifteen-year-olds the majority this subreddit consists of.

                        We don't want "boys."

                        We want MEN.

                        No, you don't have to be sexy. No, you don't have to be "hot." You don't need to look handsome even. What you do need, though, is kindness. Compassion. Sympathy. Gentleness. Carefulness. Love.

                        That is what we want most over any other thing, be it looks, sex drive, intelligence, what kind of car you drive, whether you play golf or not, whatever. What we want most is love. That's it. You don't have to be good in bed, or drive a Porche or Farrari. You don't have to have good looks or be handsome. The only thing you have to have is love to give.

                        As long as you treat us like an adult and love us and be there for us through thick and thin, and caring and kind and giving and respectful, I can promise you, you will receive just a much love, if not more, than you give.

                        This is coming from a girl, soon to be a woman. Please take my words into thought and you'll find that you'll have a much better chance with us. Most importantly, be respectful.

                        That is all.

                        [–]heist_of_saint_graft 6 points7 points  (0 children)

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                        +1. This is my take on it. My type of girl is the one who'll put her head in the nook of my shoulder and call me "Daddy". It's an archetype / frame of affection that women understand on a gut level.

                        [–][deleted]  (6 children)

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                        [deleted]

                          [–]2 Mredpillschool 14 points15 points  (3 children)

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                          One thing to add to this is that you, as a man, don't have to accept childish behavior from women and it behooves you not to. Demand quality.

                          I think this is bad advice. Imagine I told you to go get yourself a pet dog, but make sure you don't settle for one that acts like a dog...

                          ...you're going to spend a lot of time going through dogs that do dog things- shit on the floor, bark at cars, all the dog things.

                          Eventually you'll come back to me and say, "well some were better than others, but they were all dogs..."

                          You learn to expect who they are and you learn to accept it, and to mitigate it.

                          Somewhere there's somebody quoting this post who doesn't understand analogies. "RPS LITERALLY thinks women are pet dogs... OMG"

                          [–]16 Endorsed ContributorGayLubeOil[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

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                          All metaphors are completely lost on out opposition. Its kind of ironic because children don't realy do well with metaphors either.

                          [–]BenMeWimmins 1 point2 points  (1 child)

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                          If women are really like this (and I think they are), fuck 'em. Why the fuck would I want to have to raise a grown woman who is actually a child? I DON'T WANT KIDS.

                          Is it really worth jumping through all these hoops and putting up with all this shit just to get laid?

                          [–]Notinjuschillin -1 points0 points  (0 children)

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                          This is so true...in my experience I don't let her know i'm treating her like a child. They want to feel like they have a say in the relationship when in fact she doesn't, and I am creating the illusion that she has some power. This is to keep her from bitching. Every now and then I ask her "what do you think?" then I do what I was planning on doing before I asked her opinion.

                          [–]desylid 2 points3 points  (5 children)

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                          Maybe it's just observer bias, but I swear that I'm seeing increasing amounts of RedPill opinions and behavior from the people in my life and even in internet forums. It's possible that I'm seeing what was already there, but I'm starting to think there is a widespread wake-up.

                          [–]real-boethius 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                          A year or two ago I was a lone voice in my facebook but now there are many.

                          [–]Endorsed ContributorUsherai 0 points1 point  (2 children)

                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                          I think there's a definite trend of people not believing the bullshit as much.

                          [–][deleted]  (5 children)

                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                          [deleted]

                            [–]16 Endorsed ContributorGayLubeOil[S] 3 points4 points  (4 children)

                            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                            First Im kind of impressed by their rapid turn around time. I wrote this post while eating my cottage cheese post workout, then went to sleep. When I woke up I was pleased to see all of the brofisting that was going on and the river of feminist tears that had begun flowing. The most surprising thing is that there are entire blog posts dedicated to me.

                            Next while my post is filled with reactionary Red Pill Rhetoric. It has a kind underlying message that all of the bluepillers missed. Take care of your woman. Feed her, give her comfort, take care of her and she wont be as cranky. I realy dont see whats so wrong with that.

                            Next everyone was mocking my yogurt recommendation. Yogurt is a nutrient ritch food filled with enzymes and good bacteria. It also makes Iron more bio available which is why I recommended a yogurt pomegranate combo. The audience of Manboobz thinks me taking care of a woman's nutritional needs is creepy.

                            As for David Futrelle. Its one thing to participate in the redpill blue pill circle jerk for lols. Its another to exploit my writing for your shitty blog.

                            [–]Endorsed ContributorRedSunBlue 1 point2 points  (1 child)

                            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                            For Reference: David Futrelle, author of the "Manboobz" blog

                            [–]16 Endorsed ContributorGayLubeOil[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                            Don't worry brother. GayLubeOil will prepare a formal response to Gynecomastia Internet wizard Futrelle. One that the bros at Red Pill will enjoy.

                            [–]WhiteHatRasta 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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                            We must never speak of this. Please everyone burn up your copies...

                            also,

                            I cant believe you never told me that you X! Aww is she hungry.
                            - - Nailed it rofl

                            [–]fx-115es 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                            Gentleman, there is more to this.