all 170 comments

[–]gt35r 72 points73 points  (6 children)

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For people who are new here and new to the methods preached here, this is by far the easiest and one of the first things you should start doing. I say easy, for me it was at least, for some maybe it's a bad habit but when you start ending your sentences firmly without "sorry to bother you, sorry this, sorry that" you will feel more confident and people will typically respect you more for stating things that way.

[–]newbie3hunna 10 points11 points  (1 child)

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I agree 100%. I actually notice the situations in which I would have apologized and instead I stand up for myself, the effect is amazing.

[–]PlantNutrient 24 points25 points  (0 children)

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Sometimes I'll find myself about to say "sorry" and then I take a step back, and then come back with something else.

The trick I heard on BAM was

If you're going to apologize for something, start it with "I apologize for ____". If it seems ridiculous to say that for whatever you're about to say "sorry" for, then you shouldn't apologize for it.

[–]deville05 1 point2 points  (2 children)

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Whats a better way of saying "im sorry to bother you but.."? I say it out of polite habit. Not that im really sorry.

[–]jecht8 2 points3 points  (1 child)

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"Pardon me."

[–]deville05 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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That was easy

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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truth

[–]1 Endorsed Contributorvandaalen 34 points35 points  (12 children)

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I'd advocate to completely ban the word "Sorry" from your vocabulary. It's one of the words which is overused in an unecessary way. If you deliberatly try to avoid using it you'll be surprised how often you do.

And I would also say: Never apologize for anything. Unless you feel it's absolutely necessary AND you feel the urge to.

Having hurt somebodies feelings isn't always such a situation. People get offended way too much today and have become a collective of pussies. No need to support this by joining in the chant.

I must have clearly made an error to justify an apology.

If you need somebody to apologize to, then make it yourself. For treating yourself so badly and allowing others to do so.

[–]bonekeeper 12 points13 points  (2 children)

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I'd advocate to completely ban the word "Sorry" from your vocabulary.

That's the Dothraki way. It is known.

[–]1 Endorsed Contributorvandaalen 4 points5 points  (1 child)

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Had to google that. Never watched Game of Thrones up to now.

[–]bonekeeper 6 points7 points  (0 children)

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Yeah, they don't have a word for "thanks" either.

[–]laere 2 points3 points  (4 children)

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what about thank you, and please.

[–][deleted] 7 points8 points  (2 children)

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I'd say that is just good manners, it isn't supplicating in the same way as saying sorry.

[–]Endorsed ContributorRedPillDad 23 points24 points  (1 child)

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In business I use this little trick: Rather than focusing on my infraction, I focus on their good manners. So, instead of saying "Sorry I'm late" I would instead say, "Thank you for your patience." It acknowledges their good virtue rather than my mistake and triggers a very different response.

[–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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bingo

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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Please is dependent upon the situation (I prefer 'would you kindly' and similar pre-statements); thanks are a good reward for someone that's performed well.

[–]PM_ME_BOOTYSHOTS 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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Sorry is reserved for when I hit you with a car or something equally egregious.

[–]bitzin 0 points1 point  (2 children)

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There is a few situations that apologizing can work well for you. But generally people use it when they didn't even do anything at all wrong.

[–]1 Endorsed Contributorvandaalen 0 points1 point  (1 child)

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That's what I meant.

How often will somebody start a sentence with "I am sorry, but..." and then go on to tell his opinion on a topic or suggest an inevitable action? That's completely unnecessary and wasted energy and time.

I am not sorry for my opinion and I am also not sorry if I offend you with my opinion. I know we have to do a certain thing and I am not sorry for being the one pointing it out. So why say this?

This is basically saying: "Please don't hurt me for it." It's a defence mechanism that I don't need since I am confident enough as a person.

[–]bitzin 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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Some people would just prefer to avoid trouble by being submissive than looking strong. It is a sign of weakness and usually ends up getting you in more trouble than if you just stood up for yourself.

[–][deleted]  (14 children)

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[deleted]

    [–][deleted] 20 points21 points  (0 children)

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    This is a good tip. Not only does it not place you in a supplicating position like saying "sorry" would, it points out politely that the other person may be in error. Plus having good manners is always a useful skill -- one that some new practitioners of TRP sometimes abandon.

    [–]1critter_about_towne 22 points23 points  (3 children)

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    It's funny how that and "pardon me" works, since essentially you're still asking for them to excuse you, to pardon you. Yet it does work, I employ it to great effect. Perhaps the difference is that when you apologise, you are saying you are in a state of being sorry (thus implicitly admitting you have done wrong), but when you ask for pardon or excuse, you are just as easily saying "you are are going to have to excuse or pardon my behaviour in order to avoid being upset, because either way I'm going to do it."

    I've been known to say "For what?" and laugh when someone says "Sorry" just for showing up from around a corner with no real possibility of a collision occurring (I'm talking 2, 2.5m distance here). The laugh takes the edge off of what is essentially a scold :P

    [–]cosi_fan_tutte 2 points3 points  (2 children)

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    "Heads up" is my go-to for this. Neutral, and encourages situational awareness. You can vary your tone from amused to assertive to fit the context.

    [–]Buchloe 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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    "coming through!"

    [–]dawg826 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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    I like this, it's a fun way of saying excuse me for when the mood fits.

    [–]einexile 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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    I prefer pardon me. I'm not always sure I want to be pardoned, but I'm positive I don't need to be excused.

    [–]Gstreetshit -1 points0 points  (0 children)

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    if someone says "excuse me" I always just nonchalantly say "yep" or "yeah"

    [–]K3R3G3 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

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    I recently had some dude basically push through me in a gas station and say "Excuse you" as he did it. I angrily and loudly said "Excuse me?!" and stared at him, waiting for him to turn around and say something on his way out, but he didn't and just kept walking. I was really fucking pissed. He had no right of way. I'm pissed just picturing it again.

    [–]TannhauserOverture 98 points99 points  (27 children)

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    It's true. It works.

    Like in that scene in the first Episode of House of Cards where Claire Underwood says: "Don't apologize. My husband doesn't apologize to anyone, not even me."

    [–]BoutThatLife 46 points47 points  (26 children)

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    Claire Underwood - the goddess of red pill women IMO

    [–]McDoogleSnatch 31 points32 points  (10 children)

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    Except for the boyish short hair.

    [–][deleted] 21 points22 points  (9 children)

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    Some girls look hot with that hair type

    [–]Cross_of_Coronado 24 points25 points  (8 children)

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    Not her

    [–]moalfred 2 points3 points  (6 children)

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    Emma Watson looks hot with short hair, and Jennifer Laurence looks okay with it, better with longer hair though. Claire on House of Cards might've been hot 10+ years ago, but no matter what type of hair she's got, she won't look very good in it.

    [–]1Ill_mumble_that 1 point2 points  (4 children)

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    [–]TannhauserOverture 6 points7 points  (1 child)

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    The godess of RP-women or the godess of feminism? She acts like a man at work, wears her hair short, needs a class-a Dark Triad like F. Underwood to dominate her and STILL can't help cheating on him with some fancy-shmancy photographer... And that handjob for the dying Secret Service agent!

    Nope, her relationship with her husband seems to be soley based on their mutually shared hunger for power; I'll go with godess of feminism, but yes, she does show some RP-tendencies...

    [–]1Ill_mumble_that 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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    What do this reply have to do with my comment whatsoever? I was stating she was hot 25 years ago.

    [–]moalfred 0 points1 point  (1 child)

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    Holy shit, Claire Underwood is Princess Buttercup?

    I did not see that

    [–]1Ill_mumble_that 2 points3 points  (0 children)

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    Also Jenny from Forest Gump. Crazy how long she has been at it.

    [–]johngalt1234 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

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    Careful. We may end up pedestalizing women again by calling some of them goddesses specially those who seems to embody all that is RP. Truthfully there are no goddesses. Let not the gynolatry fool you.

    [–]thewrightstuff88 22 points23 points  (12 children)

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    i work with this kid who says sorry/apologizes for EVERYTHING. I work at a coffee establishment and if he's in the way of the sink and i need to clean something, he just zips away and says sorry. If i need to grab a cup and he's like a foot away from the cups, he says sorry, like he offended my aura or something. its to the point where you want to smack him and give him a solid reality check

    [–]New_Horiz0ns 31 points32 points  (3 children)

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    Just tell him

    He probaly apologise again

    [–][deleted] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

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    STOP SAYING SORRY DAMMIT

    sorry

    [–]thewrightstuff88 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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    im 99.9% sure he's gonna say sorry to me about saying sorry. the kid has been "engaged" once, to a 30 year old chick (big fuckin red flag) and called it off, then got engaged with someone else who is like 19 or 20, and the engagements occurred within a short amount of time of meeting the girl, 2-3 months.

    [–]another1takesthepill 2 points3 points  (4 children)

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    Next sorry give him the link to this post

    [–]thewrightstuff88 1 point2 points  (3 children)

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    I just can't let him in on the big ole TRP, thats for him to discover and me to know

    [–]KenuR 6 points7 points  (2 children)

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    ...why?

    [–]cbeeman15 11 points12 points  (1 child)

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    I feel like this is a place people need to come to on their own. You can't just shove it in someones face and expect them to understand. In general they need to be hurt by a woman or truly want to better themselves or ajust be at the point where they have no luck with women. We can help them find trp once they are ready, but we can't force it on them.

    [–]K3R3G3 2 points3 points  (0 children)

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    I've needed it for a long, long time and only found out about it a few months ago because of someone trashing and linking to it in another sub. Wish I had known sooner.

    [–]Sturmgeist781 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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    When women do this it's very irritating.

    I've dated girls who say sorry over anything if I question them or if something comes up.

    It's a turn off for guys as well. "STOP FUCKING SAYING SORRY!" "Sorry...."

    [–]hairaware -1 points0 points  (1 child)

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    is he canadian?

    [–]thewrightstuff88 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

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    no ehs or aboots or french accents so i think not

    [–]psygma 15 points16 points  (2 children)

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    This is annoying on both sides.

    I dated a girl who used to apologise for all the wrong things. Shit was annoying.

    Use "sorry" for what it was intended - to apologize. Not as a social buffer/lubricant.

    [–]chakravanti93 5 points6 points  (1 child)

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    Never say you're sorry. Even if you must apologize, don't insinuate that you might be a pathetic sorry ass bitch.

    If you make a mistake, say "Let me apologize for that; I can make it right by [insert method of compensation here]."

    Shit happens too. Don't apologize if someone get marginalized because shit happens. If you happen to be in a position of responsibility, you can offer to "make right" what is "naturally wrong" as a service akin to insurance that the person has earned by being subordinate and meeting your needs meeting your responsibility by being themselves responsible.

    If you can't make it right don't even bother say anything other than, "There's nothing I can do for you about that."

    [–]PM_ME_BOOTYSHOTS 5 points6 points  (0 children)

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    "Mistakes were made"

    [–][deleted] 17 points18 points  (1 child)

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    I used to apologize for everything, every time. It was a conditioning from the brow beating I received from my ex wife. After we split I made a point to stop saying sorry unless I was really in the wrong. Its so much better.

    [–]1xwm 8 points9 points  (0 children)

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    This happened to me with my ex that eventually drove me into the arms of trp. It just got so tiring being sorry for everything, up to and including existing sometimes. Honestly is was exhausting at a soul-weary level. Eventually I just got to the point of "Shes a big girl, she can deal with my opinion or she can't, but its my opinion either way and damned if it isn't a good one."

    [–]garlicextract 9 points10 points  (0 children)

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    A friend told me several years back "never apologize to a woman".

    Oh, how long it took for me to understand it.

    [–]the_Milkweed 16 points17 points  (6 children)

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    Canadian here, can't relate

    [–]bbbbbubble 5 points6 points  (4 children)

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    Are you sorry?

    [–]MysterMoron 14 points15 points  (1 child)

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    [–]the_Milkweed 2 points3 points  (0 children)

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    [–]Cacciaguida 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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    also Canadian, it's just natural, sorry.

    [–]nicholmikey 2 points3 points  (0 children)

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    Exactly, as a Canadian this is all very confusing.

    [–]blue_27 5 points6 points  (1 child)

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    So ... what is the Canadian version of this?

    [–]theaudiophiliad 2 points3 points  (0 children)

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    Yeah, I have difficulty with this.

    Source: Canadian

    [–][deleted] 11 points12 points  (5 children)

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    I think I've mentioned this before, but when you really truly made a mistake and need to own up to it, you should still avoid saying the word "sorry" or even "apologize". instead, thank the person for accepting the inconvenience. So instead of "sorry I was late," say "thank you for waiting for me". It's a subtle re-frame but I feel like it works for me.

    [–]throwpillo 7 points8 points  (2 children)

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    At first, I really liked your comment.

    But as I thought more about it, when you fail to execute/honor your own agreements (being late), a small degree of mea culpa is totally appropriate. really fucking useful and totally on-frame.

    Further, vigorously avoiding particular words because FRAME seems really petty when you failed to keep your word/agreement.

    The presence of a particular word doesn't fuck up your frame.

    [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

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    I see what you mean, but I still think it's useful if only as a self-suggestion kind of thing. You see yourself as someone who never (or rarely) supplicates by saying "sorry" - this is especially powerful if you used to have a bad habit of saying "sorry" in your blue pill days...

    [–]throwpillo 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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    I see. I reckon total abstinence is a good way for some to detox from a bad habit. Like a tolerance break.

    [–]Unconaction 2 points3 points  (0 children)

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    Second that. Acknowledging the inconvenience, "thanks for waiting", and getting down to business. Respects other person, maintains the frame. Thank for your advice.

    [–]BooksofMagic 2 points3 points  (0 children)

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    This should be higher up - good point

    [–]NGGYUNGLYDNGRAADY 8 points9 points  (3 children)

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    We're looking at you....... Canada.

    [–]infernalsatan 6 points7 points  (0 children)

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    sorry

    [–]Cacciaguida 3 points4 points  (0 children)

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    sorry.

    [–]mr_kat 3 points4 points  (0 children)

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    Sorry

    [–]1Hyooge 8 points9 points  (2 children)

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    you'll start to love it.

    I'm addicted to it. It is the simplest way to make you the most powerful man in the room. Watch people's reactions and you can literally see their eyes fill with respect when you are blunt and not wishy washy.

    Also "no" should be your goto response to everything you're asked that you don't want to do or have no benefit from.

    No = Power.

    [–][deleted]  (1 child)

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    [deleted]

      [–]1Hyooge 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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      It can be quite tough but I habitually and boldy said no to my own father after he asked me to do something. People feel respect for you more than they feel offended.

      [–]projectself 6 points7 points  (0 children)

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      I heard it said somewhere last year that in a romantic relationship, you get to say "sorry" twice. use them wisely.

      [–]DeaD_bAU5 4 points5 points  (9 children)

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      This is going to be tough, I'm Canadian.

      [–][deleted]  (6 children)

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      [deleted]

        [–]JoeyJoeJoeShabadou 2 points3 points  (2 children)

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        What part of Ontario? I found people in the south to be crazy rude.

        We're also conditioned by our environment. So if the people around you are overly polite and you were raised to act that way, it's going to seem completely normal to you. You won't notice the stereotype.

        Americans are pretty friendly and some Europeans are weirded out by that when traveling to the US. But it's just how we act in North America.

        [–][deleted]  (1 child)

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        [deleted]

          [–]theaudiophiliad 0 points1 point  (0 children)

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          Sorry about your mayor.

          [–]DeaD_bAU5 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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          You from GTA?

          [–]1FrogTrainer 1 point2 points  (1 child)

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          I don't think Canadians are abnormally nice, it's just that the part of the USA that borders Canada has gotten abnormally rude.

          [–]EagleGod 5 points6 points  (0 children)

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          Fuck you, no we haven't.

          [–]infernalsatan 0 points1 point  (1 child)

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          We need a Red Pill designed for Canadians

          [–]DeaD_bAU5 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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          actually there are some pretty big differences dealing with canadian women as opposed to american ratchet

          [–]Lilcheeks 2 points3 points  (0 children)

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          In my early 20s I had an issue with too much "sorry". GFs hated it. I learned through trial and error that it was a bad word. Not only does it make you look weak but it's fucking meaningless to begin with. An empty sorry does nothing positive for you or anyone else.

          Like someone else said, if you need someone to move out of your way just give a strong "excuse me" to let them know you're coming through.

          [–]raceAround126 2 points3 points  (0 children)

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          This is my current challenge. It's harder than you think. I read this a while ago somewhere else and realized that I was damn near apoligizing every few minutes for existing.

          I'm learning to replace it with a smile and a firm "excuse me" when passing people.

          It is definitely different. People (not just women) seem to automatically concede to you. And it's kinda weird having people apologize to you as a result.

          I also decided a couple of weeks ago that as part of the approach every day mantra, I would start approaching in coffee shops for day game. Well, the other day I did so and had a great conversation about coffee shop dwellers. Sadly it was with a dude - there were no attractive females in the vicinity and he had a Slayer shirt on. But, all practice is good practice. So far, I've found attractive female coffee shop types want to be left alone. I've had much more success engaging with groups of girls in coffee shops, be they professional or obvious out-of-workers. Nothing sexual with those, just want to practice my approaches.

          But yes, ditch the sorry!!!!

          [–]Johnny10toes 2 points3 points  (1 child)

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          It's a hard habit to break.

          [–]Mr_Cens 2 points3 points  (0 children)

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          Sorry

          [–][deleted] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

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          I grew up apologizing for inconveniencing people, etc., and I got by fine since most men are taught by their mothers to apologize. This was one of the first behavior mods I gleamed from TRP and has been highly enlightening: I've discovered that apologizing very rarely helps in any circumstances -- it's just a word, it has virtually zero weight to it; acting (e.g. to remedy a situation I am responsible for) speaks volumes more than apologizing.

          I still find myself occasionally slipping it in from old habits, but the mentality this change brings through conscious effort cannot be understated.

          [–]monsieurhire2 2 points3 points  (0 children)

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          Gah, I STILL catch myself doing this compulsively! Like, if I'm trying to learn a dance move, and I screw up, I say "Sorry!" like a beta schlub.

          I've noticed that when I get pissed off, and say things like, "What are you talking about, I did that PERFECTLY!" with a shit-eating grin, it works better. I recall dancing with this woman and I kept screwing up and saying sorry to the point where she was like, "Stop saying that," and then I started doing it as a joke.

          So much beta still left to purge.

          [–]2emptyform 5 points6 points  (0 children)

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          I've been removing the word for my vocab, struggling in certain situations where I still needed to express regret (even if I didn't feel it), such as in business. When dealing with higher-ups or clients, I still never say the word "sorry" if I can't meet a request or whatever. I say "unfortunately". "Unfortunately, the deadline's already passed." This seems to work well for me.

          [–]HeadingRed 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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          This is one key area I have been trying to address for the last few months. Look at it this way-

          If you do it far to often for no good reason, it won't mean shit when you really have something to apologize for.

          [–]RPthrowaway123 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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          I used to do this all the time. Getting rid of my constant apologies was something I did when I started reading no more Mr nice guy! and its been huge for me!

          [–][deleted]  (1 child)

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          [deleted]

            [–]aazav 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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            You would prefer AIDSdragon?

            [–]Endorsed ContributorRedBigMan 1 point2 points  (1 child)

            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

            On the rare occasion something does deserve an apology. Do not drag it out. Make it short, sweet and to the point then drop it ASAP.

            [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

            Whenever I accidentally bump into someone when walking somewhere or in our dining halls ill say 'you're good'.

            so its like implying that theyre saying 'im sorry' and then you just forgive.

            very small thing but it implies alpha

            [–]herewegoaga1n 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

            Well, fuck. -Canada

            [–]Bigmachiavelli 1 point2 points  (0 children)

            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

            If you NEED to apologize. Say " I apologize" rather than "I'm sorry".

            One is you taking an action the other speaks to your state of being.

            [–]General_Awesome 1 point2 points  (1 child)

            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

            In some situations it should be said however. For example, if you step on someone's foot, you should apologize, or else people will just think you're a prick

            [–]Evil_Henchman 0 points1 point  (0 children)

            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

            The only time you should apologize is if you hurt someone, or really fuck up

            I think that falls under hurting someone

            [–]laere 3 points4 points  (2 children)

            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

            Holy shit this works. Actually a girl I work with always says "sorry." ALL THE TIME. Hell I'd walk past her and we'd brush shoulders and she'd turn and be like "sorry."

            I confronted her and said "hey X you say sorry way to fucking much, cut that shit out, please." She's like "haha yea I probably should." Told her I used to be the same way back then. It makes a fucking difference.

            Also I still practice not saying it. It's so wired into the subconscious though that it takes time. But hey, fucking worth. Great post man.

            [–]newguyacct 6 points7 points  (1 child)

            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

            Don't tell a woman not to say sorry. That's how you make a bitch.

            [–]laere -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

            Oh welp fuck. Lesson learned.

            [–]Gstreetshit 2 points3 points  (0 children)

            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

            sorry

            [–]aazav 1 point2 points  (1 child)

            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

            This will really hit Canadians where it hurts.

            [–]averagecycle 0 points1 point  (2 children)

            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

            I don't use the word sorry at all. If I do something that's worth apologizing for I say my bad.

            Try it for a week...you'll like the results

            [–]welly321 1 point2 points  (1 child)

            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

            This is just as bad.

            [–]averagecycle -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

            if you can come up for something better for when you bump into somebody or something I'm all ears.

            [–][deleted]  (2 children)

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            [deleted]

              [–][deleted]  (1 child)

              sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

              [deleted]

                [–]Macky_Hauser 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                Thank you!

                [–]betabux 0 points1 point  (3 children)

                sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                What about hispanic countries? Spanish has words like "disculpa" and "perdon" both can mean "sorry" "excuse me" or "forgive me"

                [–]2mbillion 0 points1 point  (1 child)

                sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                its about tone and intonation in that case. The point is to not be apologetic for stuff there is no reason to apologize for

                [–]betabux 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                That makes more sense.

                [–]beltfedshooter 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                Use 'con permiso" instead

                [–]Sturmgeist781 0 points1 point  (4 children)

                sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                Last night in a bar I bumped into two guys slightly shorter than me but more broad and more built than me. I didn't say a word, didn't acknowledge them and just kept walking.

                Had I apologized I probably would have looked like a twat.

                Just keep your head up and don't say sorry.

                [–][deleted]  (1 child)

                sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                [deleted]

                  [–]Sturmgeist781 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                  Ignore and continue.

                  [–]welly321 0 points1 point  (1 child)

                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                  I find it funny people even remember doing stuff like this. I bump into tons of people every time I'm at the bar, I could hardly recall a specific person let alone describe them like you have

                  [–]Sturmgeist781 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                  The bar had ten people in, including the two clowns who were standing in the middle of the way coming back from the bathroom.

                  I only remembered it because of how stupid the two guys were taking up space.

                  [–]MrZigler 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                  [–]a_chill_bro 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                  Great post. There are a couple things I would add to that.

                  Aside from apologizing, you should eradicate inappropriate justification and explanations to others. This is especially true for arguments or when in a conflict.

                  This is just as bad as needless apologizing because it automatically puts you on the defensive. You are operating under someone else's frame and actively seeking their approval.

                  The only exception would be when dealing with a superior (a manager, boss, etc.)

                  More on this later.

                  [–]PM_ME_BOOTYSHOTS 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                  Truth.

                  Didn't reply to a text for 5 hours? Don't say sorry if they call you on it. Don't even offer an explanation.

                  You are BUSY You have shit to do. Shit that matters more than some plate. I don't care if that's not true and all you were doing was playing COD, act like it.

                  [–]DarkSayed 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                  great advice. On board shall it be taken.

                  [–]SixSixDickTrix 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                  I just hate how everything seems so scripted, like when people say sorry to me and I don't know what to respond with. Like if I accidentally run into someone in the hall, we both mutually say sorry, or I look and feel like a dick. But if its over something menial that they do and they say sorry, while its entirely unnecessary, I can't even say "No problem" or "that's alright" because it's so absolutely minor. But I can't just say nothing can I, and now you ought to apologize as well for putting me into this awkward position since you've gone so far as to apologize for accidentally touching my foot under the desk. TL;DR don't say sorry to me, I wont have to say shit back. capisce!

                  [–]Spookybear_ 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                  I guess it's a matter of culture. Where I live, nobody says sorry. Bump into someone? It almost becomes a quest of ignoring the other person without awkwardness

                  [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                  I've stopped this too.

                  Also i noticed new women who are attracted to me say sorry for EVERYTHING when i am around them. Correlation?

                  [–]WeAreAllSheep 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                  so be a black guy?

                  [–]eazy_bgko 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                  Yeah i guess i gotta stop apologizing when i take a while to respond to a text or call. Thanks for the tip!

                  [–]Casanova-Quinn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                  When you walk down a hallway at work and someone is in your way, why are you saying sorry?

                  "Excuse me" is the proper phrase for this situation.

                  [–]Emiel000 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                  I saw this title and just wanted to jump in and say this is solid advice. Continuously apologizing gives off this vibe of wallowing in self-pity, it's not attractive at all, and in the end you just look like a sad beta fuck. Good post

                  [–]StandOrDie 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                  Sorry's a sorry ass word.

                  [–]Moresolater 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                  There is a huge different between being sorry and feeling sorry. If someone's dog dies you say you feel sorry, meaning you empathize with them. You're not actually sorry for having done something wrong you feel sorry for them meaning you pity them. However dealing with everyday run ins I usually say sorry if I'm the one that hits people. I tend to be an aggressive walker that has broad shoulders so I usually smash several people per day. I usually say sorry to them. If something is not my fault however I never ever say sorry. Never apologize for something that you don't feel is wrong, people will respect you more for it

                  [–]Spiarff 0 points1 point  (3 children)

                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                  What if you're clumsy and frequently punch people in the nose while putting on a sweatshirt?

                  [–]Koss424 3 points4 points  (0 children)

                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                  then you should probably apologize and then go out and buy some button-down shirts.

                  [–]christiefrontdrive 2 points3 points  (1 child)

                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                  You should tell them to back the fuck away from you when you're putting clothes on.

                  [–]Gstreetshit 2 points3 points  (0 children)

                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                  Then if they give you any lip about it, kick that fucker directly in the shin and fart in their general direction. Shin kicks suck

                  [–]a_nus 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                  I come from a country where nobody apologizes (unless you obviously hurt someone)

                  When I first arrived to the US I found it weird that people said "sorry" when they walked past me. It's kind of funny. I tried to get into the "saying sorry" thing for a few days but I just couldn't do it. I've had 2 girls tell me they like how I don't apologize or say "you're welcome" (I just say "mmhm")

                  [–]Grainslol 0 points1 point  (2 children)

                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                  I'm tall so I can just walk through people and they move aside. I never walk around women.

                  [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                  I love playing the "walking chicken" game - will that dipshit walking on the wrong side of the sidewalk get out of the way in time? I fucking know you see me coming... I've literally walked right into people who don't get out of the way, it's hilarious.

                  [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                  Gotta try this.

                  [–]Heave 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                  It's funny to notice, and apply this, since everyone that brushes passed me and says sorry like its oxygen. Every time a scenario like this takes place it would take place like this, they say "sorry" and in my head I'm like "you better be".

                  [–]shot_the_chocolate 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                  This subreddit will make arseholes of us all.

                  [–]AugustusM 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                  Not applicable in Britain. Failure to needlessly apologise will have only negative social consequences.

                  [–]renegade2point0 0 points1 point  (0 children)

                  sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                  Replace the word sorry in your head with "that fills me with sorrow" and you won't be wasting your sorrys on the little crap.

                  [–][deleted]  (5 children)

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                  [deleted]

                    [–][deleted]  (4 children)

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                          sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

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                            [–]Gstreetshit -1 points0 points  (1 child)

                            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                            Maybe I'm just a dick, but if I'm walking I don't move out of the way. It just doesn't occur to me. If someone is in my way I just say "I need to get by you"

                            If someone says "excuse me" I just say yep, yeah, or you're good/fine

                            [–]TheSilverFin -1 points0 points  (0 children)

                            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                            I'm British, I can't help it!

                            [–]captshady -1 points0 points  (0 children)

                            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                            On top of that, when someone apologizes, don't reply with "that's okay". Use "apology accepted" or "don't worry about it." "That's okay", relieves them of ownership.

                            [–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

                            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                            i did this, its really good.

                            [–][deleted]  (1 child)

                            sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                            [deleted]

                              [–]DingDongSeven -1 points0 points  (0 children)

                              sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                              Metacomment:

                              This Red Pill thread has someone named HerpesDragon telling people to "Stop apologizing for everything," followed by a bunch of heavily upvoted comments agreeing with it.

                              Ain't that something?

                              [–]theecharon -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

                              sorry, this has been archived and can no longer be voted on

                              But I am Canadien, Sorry but I can't not!