all 74 comments

[–]MisterParty 70 points71 points  (7 children)

This is but one reason why I enjoy posting in TRP vs other subs. Everyone here does take this advice and doesn't waste all day on Reddit. You get commentary over a few days instead of hours.

One of my favorite quotes of all time is from Mr. Badass himself, Charlie Munger:

"The best way to get what you want is to deserve it."

It's not the easy route. It's not the advice you'll hear every day either. But put yourself in the shoes of someone who deserves that girl, deserves the promotion, deserves to have their own company, etc. You get the point. It implies you must work for it rather than just expect good things to fall in your lap. But I have found this to be absolutely true and a great mentality to have as the day goes on.

That all being said, here I am responding to your post within a half hour. Back to work. Thanks for the post.

[–]robot-b 56 points57 points  (0 children)

"The best way to get what you want is to deserve it."

My friends constantly complain that I am always with cute girls or always bring girls to parties whereas they get hardly none.

Then I ask them, do you approach girls on the street? no Do you go out after work to the local bar and try and meet girls? no Do you drag yourself out after work even though you can barely keep your eyes open and you just want to drag yourself home and sit in front of the PC? no Do you work out 3-4 times a week? no Do you spend every week talking to at least 10 girls? no

and these are the same guys I see posting on facebook daily, spending almost every weekend getting drunk with their high school buddies from 10 years ago

I brought this beautiful 8/10 Taiwanese girl down to a friend's beach shack over the summer in early January. My friend was already there and I rock up, introduce them and eventually she goes off. He looks at me with the same look I've seen a million times (how the fuck do you get these girls all the time).

'I met her on New Years at a party, talked to her, danced a bit, invited her to a club, dirty danced. We start making out and then whisper in her ear, 'Wanna go back to mine and fuck?'

you're so lucky

'fuck off. I was at that party because I've been meeting people, making connections and got invited there.it was weeks of socialising etc that I did beforehand which put me in that position. I got to that outcome because I worked hard for it'.

Then, I find out that this guy didn't even go OUT on NYE and instead came to the beach cottage early. NYE I think has got me laid the last 4 years running, and its generally from out of nowhere (some girl will call me on the night, meet one at a party like this story etc). Gotta be in it to win it.

would like to note: I ask her if she has a BF (she was way too hot not to). She did, but 'its fine, he's not here'. Could feel her body quiver when i whispered that I wanted to fuck her.

[–][deleted]  (1 child)

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    [–]MisterParty 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Thanks for the tip. I'm going to try that now.

    [–]Pdr_vzlr -1 points0 points  (2 children)

    "The best way to get what you want is to deserve it." Great quote, is it yours?

    [–]GIGANTIC_NIGGER_DICK 4 points5 points  (0 children)

    Reread the post, he says who it's from

    [–]CadeStaker 28 points29 points  (4 children)

    This is incredibly true, not enough men embrace this mindset.

    I went from playing games all day every day, oneitis, somewhat beta, skinny - to speaking 3 languages, gaining 40 pounds, getting a job followed with promotions, and fucking plates every week or two when I need a short break from studying/etc.

    All you need to do...all you ever need to do is focus on yourself, and making yourself perfect. Fitness needs to be a top priority in a man's life, no excuses. You need to be well educated in a variety of practical things/things you take pleasure in. Become phenomenal in many aspects of your life, and never stop chiseling yourself.

    [–][deleted]  (2 children)

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      [–]Shimata 5 points6 points  (0 children)

      Not the guy you asked. Assuming you want to try to learn it for free and on your own:

      • Try "duolingo", it's fairly easy to get into and it gives you a good base, assuming you really grind out every lesson before moving on to the next one.

      • Watch movies dubbed in the language you want to learn while subtitled in your native language.

      [–]Zran 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      This gives me hope. Its a long hard road but the pay off will be worth it. I've already gone from being a lonely gamer to decently buff and studying while working part time in the field I want. Want to start learning another language once I finish my studies.

      [–]let_terror_reign 16 points17 points  (3 children)

      Quote I heard on a video, gets me pumped every single time.
      ' for What is each day but a series of conflicts between the right way, and the easy way? '.

      [–]supitsLoki 9 points10 points  (2 children)

      I fucking love that video.

      http://youtu.be/SuPLxQD4akQ

      [–]let_terror_reign 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Gets the blood pumping like nothing else.

      [–]lethean1 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

      [–]AdmiralVonJackass 13 points14 points  (0 children)

      Also the Manosphere can be a form of pointless escapism if you overindulge in it and take no action of your own.

      [–]Blocksblox 21 points22 points  (3 children)

      Along this vein: The highest value activity you can engage in is pursuing your purpose.

      Of course this means knowing your purpose first.

      This can be difficult, but it must be done or you will go with the flow like a dead fish. When you go with the flow, you are invisible and worthless.

      Once you have your mission, it becomes simple: Every activity you do is a step toward the realization of your purpose. By definition, that makes it a high value activity.

      Note: High value to you is more important that high value to society. The reasons for that are self evident.

      [–]Endorsed ContributorSarcasticus[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

      The highest value activity you can engage in is pursuing your purpose.

      Exactly. I called it "pursuing your goals" in my post, but it's the same thing. Once you've figured our what you want to achieve in your life, then it's much easier to figure our which tasks will be high value (i.e. move you towards your goals) and which are low value (i.e. do nothing to help you achieve your goals.)

      Note: High value to you is more important that high value to society.

      Indeed. When it comes to your goals or your purpose, we must be selfish and truly go after the things you want, rather than the things others want for you.

      [–]Bodegaz 8 points9 points  (1 child)

      But I just wanna smoke weed, play video games, and have sex with 10s all day....

      [–]errorstarcraft 3 points4 points  (0 children)

      Reading non fiction books is pretty good too.

      [–]foldpak111 7 points8 points  (6 children)

      Even those four hours aren't free time. It's spent taking care of personal hygiene, stretching, and eating. Rough life.

      [–]Spiderman48 7 points8 points  (1 child)

      Isn't self care something that raises your value?

      [–]foldpak111 4 points5 points  (0 children)

      True but school takes up 9 hours of my day, working out takes 3.. I like to get 8.5-9 hours of sleep. So I guess all day I'm raising my value. Rough life. Wouldn't wanna be anywhere else though

      [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (3 children)

      as someone who recently tried to put tabs on time, 4 hours accomplishes surprisingly little going in and outof a gym once is 4 hours and it yelds you like what? a brogram of muscle?

      [–]foldpak111 0 points1 point  (2 children)

      What you fail to realize is that an hour of that time is dedicated to stretching and mobility drills. The actual workout is around two hours. If you were smart you would incorporate that in your workout, or else you might snap some shit up

      [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (1 child)

      Talk about little roi, if you live you should be prepared for snapping shit up exponentially doubling every 8 years. and repairing it will only be possible in 2040-50 if humanity is motivated ( and it isn't...)

      but walking over to a gym changing, warming up, lifting for 1 hour, showering, eating, recovering mentally etc is 4 hours of downtime per workout more or less for a 2 hour workout thats probably not 5 but more like 6 hours downtime, good for the highschool guys and the hardcore NEETs maybe....

      [–]foldpak111 0 points1 point  (0 children)

      Or do it in your home. A shower should take you 60 seconds, swiveling down a thousand calorie protein shake should take about 10 minutes. Recover mentally? You did that during the cold shower and drinking the shake. You gotta step it up dude, you gotta learn multi tasking.

      [–]izomorph 5 points6 points  (1 child)

      The easiest way to determine if an activity is high value is to ask yourself this question, "Does this activity help me achieve my goals?"

      I would like to further elaborate on this and say that these activities need to help you be a better person, not just feel better. Take for example two polar opposite hobbies: playing lots of video games, vs volunteer fire rescue (and yes they can always use more volunteers).

      Both take up lots of time and dedication and focus to get good. One, however, only grants you instant gratification. The other grants you better self image, confidence, integrity, physical and mental strength, etc., that will make you a better person. Being a better person will then grant you a better level of feeling good.

      [–]whinemoreplease 2 points3 points  (0 children)

      On one hand yes, and on another hand no.

      I think it boils down to having a high amount of passion which reflects the fact that you value the time you put into any activity. It's how you communicate that passion that will communicate how much you value 1) yourself, 2) your time, and 3) your personal choice in activities.

      I don't think I'd ever agree that one activity is inherently higher value than another -- although the people that tend to one activity versus another may be. The tl;dr of this would be to be your own person and don't be anyone else's bitch, including society's.

      [–][deleted]  (1 child)

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        [–]ChadThunderdick 1 point2 points  (0 children)

        Several years ago I bought a pullup bar (the kind that hangs in the doorframe) and a bunch of dumbells and used them daily (along with lots of pushups) and although I did notice some gains, the gains were very minor, I did not start noticing serious gains until I started going to the gym. If you want to get buff you will have to go to a real gym. Unless you got the space and money to set up a real gym at home.

        [–]ImaFagLookatme 1 point2 points  (4 children)

        What are some high value activities I can engage in at night?

        [–][deleted]  (1 child)

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          [–]iamadoughnut 1 point2 points  (0 children)

          Can you elaborate a bit on Ableton Push? It looks pretty cool, do you have one yourself?

          [–]Ties5o 2 points3 points  (1 child)

          Reading, for one. Or learning- go to sites like Ted.com or Academy of Ideas and play a couple videos there.

          [–]t21spectre 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          Academy of Ideas is pretty sweet. I frequently check out similar sites and YouTube channels, that one is new for me. Thanks man!

          [–]deangelomega 2 points3 points  (25 children)

          all i want to do is bury myself in my room and sleep. I am not saying that this is bad advice at all. as a matter of fact, its probably some of the best advice i've read on here. but i just don't want to exist at this moment in time.

          [–]Blocksblox 11 points12 points  (2 children)

          nobody cares about the problems of men.

          learn this, and stop flashing us your pussy.

          NOBODY CARES if you don't care about yourself.

          [–]deangelomega 0 points1 point  (1 child)

          nobody cares about the problems of men.

          I am aware.

          learn this, and stop flashing us your pussy.

          I can see how showcasing my thoughts would have everyone think that im bitch. I ain't even mad

          NOBODY CARES if you don't care about yourself

          so what are you asking me to do? are you asking me to care about myself, since nobody else does? are you asking me to kill myself because i am wasting more worthy people's oxygen? are you asking me to never post again because i don't offer value?

          reguardless, i understand raising your value as a man is a very imprortant aspect of a man. I know now that it is the exact reason why i will not ever be a successful man.

          I dont think TRP understands this. I CANNOT RAISE MY FUCKING VALUE, some men can, i never will. every time i try i make a decsion that wipes all my value away from me.

          [–]Blocksblox -1 points0 points  (0 children)

          I was actually asking you to shut up because you don't bring any value here.

          this sub is not a pity party. go to /r/depression if you want to find people who will listen to you complain about yourself and stroke your sad ego

          [–]alpha_n3rd 30 points31 points  (11 children)

          Get the sand out of your vagina and go for a walk or something.

          [–]2 Endorsed Contributorvengefully_yours 10 points11 points  (2 children)

          Hey man, I hear ya. Sometimes its hard to get moving, to decide where you wanted go, and get motivated to go there. I wish I could stay in bed all day, but it's not possible. Your shit is yours, and it doesn't compare to anyone else's shit because you gotta do it. You probably have it worse than me, and to be honest this is a nightmare of my own making. Just this month, this is why I'm pissed and want to set fire to everything and go live under a bridge somewhere warm.

          I have to make a 3500 mile road trip this week, wanted to leave tomorrow, but my truck is buried to the axles in my driveway. Something about 15 inches of rain over the last two weeks. It snowed this morning, and I froze my ass off last night because my home isn't done yet, and my fire went out, plus it was raining like a bitch again. My driveway is a quagmire, I am behind building because I've had six days without rain since August. Everything I own is wet, I didn't get my shop built so my fresh restorations are sitting out in the weather. The last one has a leaky windshield making it a rolling fishbowl instead of a GTO. The interior is moldy as fuck, and shit getting trashed because I don't have shelter for it. Big money to redo all the shit I did once.

          Here is the kicker. I have to do damn near everything myself, by hand, including pulling stumps, cutting trees, leveling ground, moving dirt and gravel, building, keeping my vehicles running without a shop or even solid ground to work on. I have one person I can count on, and she isn't around all the time, like twice a week. Did I mention I am a fucked up veteran? They can't help me either, since I own my land and I'm not technically homeless. The snow is coming and I'm living without running water. A shower a week is all I get.

          I'm in mad rebuilding monk mode, no time for meeting chicks. I have no choice but to get up with the sun and bust my ass all day, then I can come here and get some social time. I'm sick of being wet, cold, dirty, and when I can't light a campfire due to rain, I'm hungry. I don't want to go on, but I have no choice other than hypothermia in a month, or a bullet to the brainstem, so I continue.

          [–]deangelomega 0 points1 point  (1 child)

          I am truly sorry that you are suffering at this point in time. veterans get alot of respect from me and it sucks that you have to go through this. my father is retired navy and i am very thankful for everthing he has done for this country. I thank you as well for your service for protecting my entitled ass. I truly hope that things get better for you.

          EDIT: Also, thank you for your understanding, you could have told me to get my ass in gear and stop bitching, and have complete justification to do so. I am thankful that you are willing to see things from my perspective.

          [–]2 Endorsed Contributorvengefully_yours 1 point2 points  (0 children)

          I have motivation issues too, sometimes I will go a month without doing anything, waste all that beautiful weather because I can't get started. July was like that for me this year. I have PTSD and that can wipe out my will to do damn near everything. I have dysthymia as well, a persistent depression that doesn't respond to meds, it's common to people who were abused in childhood. They combine to make life difficult for me, it's like pulling a dogsled by myself everywhere I go. It makes me strong as fuck, but I can never get rid of the sled, I just learn to pull it faster. Believe me, at 45 years old having been pulling that sled since I was 8, I'm a fucking monster, but I can still get fucked over by my brain.

          I live in your position so to speak, so it's easy to empathize. Sometimes a perspective from someone other than yourself gives you the solution to your problem. Finding a way to fix their problems presents you with the solution to yours. The thought behind it isn't "I have it do much worse than you do" it's more like "this is the shit I'm dealing with and how I try to make it work" one is constructive the other is looking for sympathy.

          I couldn't talk to my parents or siblings about any of this because they would do the "worse than you have it" thing. They also do the "you deserved the beatings and they weren't that bad" thing too. So I've known most of my life I am on my own, and if I wanted to do something I had to figure it out then make it happen myself. I rarely do the poor me thing, but you can bet your ass I do the "fuck you for screwing up my life and making it harder for your own amusement" thing.

          Hang in there and keep reminding yourself that the only one who can do it is you. Find something you want more than life itself and get working toward it. For me it was a real, honest to god, came from the factory, 242 vin GTO. That was my goal, now I have three of them, and a whole mess of other cars. Fast as fuck cars... What motivates you? What drives you? What is it that makes you want to put in the work to get the result of the work? I like cars, they aren't as fickle as women, are actually cheaper than wives by a wide margin, and I can enjoy them from buying a rusty heap, to rebuilding it, to driving it, racing it, breaking it, rebuilding it again.... You get the picture.

          Find that thing you want most of all, and go get it. Do yourself a favor and don't make it women that you want, they are far too easy and not worth that much for the effort.

          [–]sweetleef 4 points5 points  (1 child)

          Playing the woe-is-me victim and whining for attention and sympathy is not going to lift you out of whatever hole you're in.

          Nobody is going to do it for you, and talking will do nothing.

          The only way is to identify your goal, then find one thing that will get you closer to your goal, and do it right now. Don't talk about it or think about it, do it.

          Then repeat.

          [–]deangelomega 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          Playing the woe-is-me victim and whining for attention and sympathy

          I don't say this for sympathy, i do not deserve it for the mistakes that i made. I am in shitville, because i put myself there and i don't know how to get out. If i do leave i will smell like shit for the rest of my life and will have to deal with it like a man. period.

          The only way is to identify your goal, then find one thing that will get you closer to your goal, and do it right now

          since killing myself cannot be a goal, i don't know what TRP feels about suicide, but i highly doubt it's condoned. staying out of trouble is my main goal now, AT ALL COSTS! and the way i'm doing that is staying in my room.

          [–]Movonnow 6 points7 points  (0 children)

          I don't know why you are getting downvoted.

          Rather, yes, I understand why but to me it's irrelevant.

          It's perfectly OK to feel down from time to time. Especially after discovering TRP (to all the guys who downvoted him : remember anger and depression phase?)

          When someone says "i just don't want to exist", one takes those words seriously and offers support and understanding.

          So if u wanna talk a little bit more, shoot me a PM, it would be great. I personnaly went through a huge depression after finding TRP so I can totally relate to what you are saying.

          [–]2mbillion 2 points3 points  (1 child)

          I bury myself in my room all the time. There is nothing wrong with this so long as its not accompanied by self loathing and pity for oneself.

          Just make sure to make it a luxury and not a lifestyle

          [–]deangelomega 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          long as its not accompanied by self loathing and pity for oneself

          self loathing and pity is all that i have. my life is destroyed, all i can do is pick up the peices of the damage and hope it dosen't hurt anyone else.

          Just make sure to make it a luxury and not a lifestyle

          It is my life, you do not want to be associated with Grendel. I am Grendel.

          [–]Transmigratory 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          This is basically me in my final year of university... and they seem to love it.

          [–]IThoughtHeWasWithYou 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          Good post.

          Always be asking yourself, 'Am I producing, or am I consuming?'

          And if I'm consuming, am I investing? E.g. Am I consuming something (knowledge, for example) to use for more effective production later.

          [–]Rougepellet 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          Recently started using sony vegas pro to make montage parodies. Helps me learn the program very quickly. Takes up a lot of time though.

          [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          I fucking love this post.

          sadly reading TRP easily becomes a low value activity, especially with all the clickbait on trp (at least I have a whole good day behind me at this poin)

          anyway do high value activities out of the box, to find them just stop doing anything thats low value as you want to do it and be patient, your brain will work this one out within a few weeks.

          [–]RedbullF1 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          Excellent post. Seems straight forward enough to know you should be engaging in high value activities, but it's not often the case unless you allot time like you do. Thanks for sharing.

          [–]87GNX 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          THIS this this this this THIS this.

          [–]Roneldo -4 points-3 points  (4 children)

          Some days I wish I was asexual. I wished that females did not have such a strong hold over my unconscious primal instincts that they can dominate my thoughts for hours on end. Its a tough life we males lead

          [–]sweetleef 5 points6 points  (0 children)

          Your primal instincts also tell you to eat doritos until you're sick and then shoot heroin. If you can function without them, you can function in the absence of women too.

          [–]DownVoteGuru 0 points1 point  (0 children)

          Jesus Christ man.

          Start lifting.

          When you get lonely work out

          [–]robot-b -1 points0 points  (1 child)

          yeh but then you put it in them and bust a nut and you remember why being a man is great

          [–]BluepillProfessor -1 points0 points  (0 children)

          WTF is this? Being a man is not great because you can bust a nut. If that were the only goal you should be a woman. They can bust nuts over and over again without letup.

          Roneldo, I understand. It is a tough life we lead but it gets better. Learn the SMV chart.

          [–][deleted] -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

          The easiest way to raise your value as a man is to not spend time and energy creating or reading long posts on reddit. Period.