all 118 comments

[–]2 MRedPillWatchTower 294 points295 points  (9 children)

See that guys? Aren't posts like these more interesting and useful than Lena Dunham, Gamergate, and whatever the latest fem-bait Salon.com posted? FYI, to the guys who's posts we remove constantly and sometimes ban for being idiots, this is what we're referring to when we describe "contributive posts".

Well done, OP.

[–]chameleonrp[S] 60 points61 points  (2 children)

Thanks! Hopefully more non-shitposts to come. I really enjoyed writing this.

[–]gg_s 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We enjoyed reading it. Thank you.

[–]Ermgotthis 6 points7 points  (0 children)

It does feel good reading this and cutting the crap out from all those fembashing.

[–]Antagonistic_Comment 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No. This post is shit. Way too much flowerly language to make OP sound appear smarter than he is, making the post about 8x longer than it needs to be. It only caters to RP Men who aren't looking for a RP Woman.

It's not the worst thing in the world, and the audience who would enjoy it could read it and move on, but there is NO WAY it deserves to be a sticky.

[–]colombia40 49 points50 points  (10 children)

My thoughts on this may be for a separate post.

If you realize the importance of this too late I believe many a man will chase the sex drug they never had as young man well into their 30's and 40's.

They will continue to make life decisions around getting pussy rather than advancing their lives.

[–]HS-Thompson 29 points30 points  (3 children)

I'm 40 and I've definitely forsaken my life at times to chase pussy.

In fact I did it last night with a perfect bodied 24 year old that let me tie her up and have my way with her.

I'm not entirely sure I regret these decisions.

[–]1oldredder 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As long as the bats actually get gone when you swat them - there is nothing to regret Mr. Thompson. The advice of your lawyer... well maybe.

[–]colombia40 -1 points0 points  (1 child)

In that case I assume you have your shit together and high SMV in your area for a 40 year old man?

[–]HS-Thompson 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Apparently I am good looking enough I guess, but not unusually so. And I am good at talking and come across pretty well. But honesty I think the main thing I have going for me is being in NYC which is the ultimate land of abundance mentality, and truly not giving a fuck and just being aggressive and making sexual intentions clear from the very beginning.

[–]NOFAPFOOL 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I totally agree with this statement. Pussy is not everything. I am 24 year old helicopter pilot and trapeze catcher. I have lofty goals that are not easily achievable with pussy constantly on my mind. I am an attractive 6' tall Caucasian who doesnt have a problem getting women. I make my decisions for me, the pussy is something complimentary (if I have time).

Validation through sex IMO can waste time better used in other more important aspects of life.

[–]KissTheBridesmaid 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I would be interested to hear more about this. At no point in your life should you organize your life around getting pussy. Good life decisions = pussy, therefore focus first on yourself.

This should be the case no matter your age, but in your 30s is often where this starts to pay off big time and therefore this is a great time to be single and get laid a lot.

I have heard this theory around a lot, that if you are chasing skirts in your 30’s and 40’s you probably didn’t get any when you are younger (I realize this is not what you are saying, but I have seen this mentioned a lot). I can’t help but feel this simply reinforces the negative view of an unmarried man of this age and the general shaming of single men into marriage.

EDIT: Clarity

[–]Buchloe -1 points0 points  (3 children)

Great point. I for one never got ass on a regular basis until my late twenties, when my smv finally amounted to something and I had some RP game pointers to go on. Thank god for okcupid. But yeah, its a hyper focus to me at times, and it's tricky to keep in its proper place. A place that doesn't get in the way of other parts of my life. I think I used to envy my friends that had multiple girl drama, so that's one problem I've had- making things more difficult then they need to be. Getting into LTRs I shouldn't be committing to.

[–]HS-Thompson 0 points1 point  (2 children)

Thank god for okcupid.

Yeah, see not to get all "old man on the porch" here but you guys have to understand some things:

When I was in my pre-marriage dating days I actually did pretty well with casual sex. Which means I lived in NYC and could pick up girls at bars or parties reasonably often and sleep with them or date them casually for a little while. Like once or twice a month I could get a new female in the rotation maybe. Fuck 5-10 new girls a year, ballpark. That was considered pretty damm successful.

But the options were so much lower than you kids can imagine. Meeting a girl in the late 90's required, you know, actually identifying her in a crowd of real actual humans, having no idea if she was single or interested whatsoever, then trying to talk to her, and eventually get a phone number or something.

Then, you would try to wait a suitable amount of time and call her. Like with a phone, using your voice, and that phone had a wire on it connecting it to a wall a good percentage of the time. So you'd have to time the call to when she would be home, or leave a message on an answering machine (not a "voice mail" a recording on a reel of magnetic tape sitting on a table in her apartment) and then wonder if she'd call back, which might happen when you weren't next to your phone. And so on.

Then if she said yes, you'd have to make a plan. And then follow through on that plan that you made a few days in advance regardless of what else was going on. If she was running late you'd just be standing around wondering if she would show up. Trying to pick a bar or restaurant required asking friends (with a phone call, with your voice) for a good recommendation, or carrying around a Zagats guide or something. If the place wasn't any good or was closed good luck improvising, Yelp hasn't been invented yet. And so on.

So despite all this I still got laid reasonably often. Then I got married and was monogamous for 10 years. Then I fucked that up, etc. So now I can casually flip through the smartphone in my hand and have girls in their 20's lined up like a Black Friday sale outside my apartment, and get laid literally 5+ times a week by different women.

Dating is a lot different now. For a guy my age this feels like crazy-easy mode. It's a lot of fun. I have definitely spent a little too much money on going out, and a little too much time on chasing pussy this year. Big fucking deal, I had plenty of money and a vacation house and have travelled the world and all that shit. Once I get done with divorce hell I'll have that again.

In the meantime this is a lot of fun. I'm not sure if the parent comment about "advancing" your life makes that much sense. I've advanced my life into fucking the shit out of a lot of women that are 15+ years younger than me, and I am not sure a few more hours at the office or an extra 5% in my IRA balance would be a fair trade at all for this.

[–][deleted]  (1 child)

[deleted]

    [–]HS-Thompson 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Tinder. And some Okc.

    I might be exaggerating a little there are some early 30's girls in the mix too, but I've really been enjoying myself recently I have to say. It feels like shooting fish in a barrel.

    [–]FrameWalker 55 points56 points  (5 children)

    As an individual you must constantly strive to improve yourself. As you spend time chasing the chemical highs, it is possible to neglect the creation and accumulation of your own value - doing so is treacherous. When the sex slips away - what will be left? Will it be an empty shell of a man, or will it be a man who goes out there dominates himself, moves his life towards his goals? Maintain that foundation, keep approaching and the spice will flow.

    [–]H3lius 10 points11 points  (3 children)

    Agreed. In a way, this post is contrary to so many thing in TRP and should NOT be stickied simply to prove the mod's point. The only thing this post has done is confirm, once again, that sex can be a chemical addiction and that being held by a woman after X is simply pleasurable because of the need for the male mother (we're boys, and boys need their mommies, until we become men, no one said it's easy being a man). I'd rather have a fantastic emotional immune system and be happy when I'm alone. A relationship and sex will then only heighten my experience on earth.

    [–]FrameWalker 5 points6 points  (1 child)

    I'd rather have a fantastic emotional immune system and be happy when I'm alone.

    Excellent. There is nothing more damaging than oneitis without a healthy mind and body.

    There is a whole lot of truth to the post /u/chameleonrp has presented - why else would the redpill even exist? We fucking love that chemical high, and it does have its benefits. There are downsides to the chemical high as well: oneitis, divorce rape, STDs, pussy passes etc.

    [–]ibuprofiend 3 points4 points  (0 children)

    OP's 900 words can be condensed to 3: "sex feels good." That isn't especially groundbreaking or ingenious, so I have to agree with you that this post is receiving attention not because it's good, but simply because it's not about feminism.

    [–]chameleonrp[S] 21 points22 points  (0 children)

    Special thanks to to the guys on #theredpill: Anteros, physt, OmegaRed, Tizen, and fluviant for proof reading. Shoutout to IllimitableMan for mod approval.

    [–][deleted] 15 points16 points  (31 children)

    True question here. What if you simply can't find yourself enjoying or performing during casual sex? I tried many times when I was a younger man and missed many opportunities. I've fucked a few plates this year but I simply fake orgasm. I don't like casual sex. I don't enjoy it. Is this blue pill programming?

    I'd rather jack off then masturbate with a woman's body. And I've tried. I still do it. At this point I spin plates until I care enough about them, and pretend that they care about me, so I can reach orgasm. This is my reality.

    My n number could be three fold of what it is just from me not reaching orgasm with women I care nothing about. I keep trying but my body won't do it. I'm not sure what to do. I realize that my blue pill fantasies are fake but still without them I just don't reach that point. I realize other men do. How do I train myself to enjoy the only type of relationship that the modern woman will let me have?

    How do you do it? I just constantly think about going MGTOW because I do not actually want to masterbate with a woman I care nothing about.

    Perhaps I need to spin plates a different way?

    [–]Red_SoloCup 14 points15 points  (7 children)

    I'm relatively new here, so please, correct me if I'm wrong, but from my understanding, TRP isn't made for just ONS's and plate spinning. 90% of the people here agree that marriage is a bad idea, but that seems to be more based on the current state of law concerning it than anything else.

    I would say to work on your long game, and eventually you'll run across a girl you're actually interested in an LTR with, and then make that happen. I (and most others) have experienced my best (and for me, most frequent) sex with a girl I've been monogamous with. If you haven't yet, read The Sex God Method. He even talks about how sex is drastically better with someone you've had sex with before, especially if you care about the person.

    Good luck out there.

    [–]MrMagwitch 2 points3 points  (5 children)

    .

    [–]Shaft-of-Patriarchy 5 points6 points  (2 children)

    No, you're right. But you are being a bit myopic. You need to see the big picture.

    If party/club girls arent suitable for LTRing, and believe me 99.9998% of them aren't, to paraphrase a blue pill meme you're gonna fuck a lot of frogs before you find your unicorn.

    Its a crap shoot trying to find a wife in a club. Are there decent girls with low n counts in clubs? Yes. But they are there by accident not design, they're dragged there by their friends, they are the ones sitting in the corner looking uncomfortable. Or dancing but rejecting everyone that comes near.

    And that's a further problem, their bitch shields are ALWAYS at maximum. Because just as they are "just another club slut" to you. You are "just another club rat" to her.

    If you want to continue that strategy, well that's your call but unless you are very lucky you're gonna be at it a while.

    Better idea? Work on your day-game and colder approaches. Stop trying to find them outside of their natural environment and step into theirs.

    It will still be a hard slog, its still a tiny portion of these women who are worth LTRing, but your odds are significantly better

    [–]MrMagwitch 0 points1 point  (1 child)

    .

    [–]Shaft-of-Patriarchy 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    I suppose we are. I just detected a note of defeatism about your post, thought you might have needed another perspective. I may have just been projecting.

    Either way, play on playah ;)

    [–]19 Endorsed Contributordrrrrrr 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    I think what you're getting at is that all men are somewhat different and want somewhat different things at different stages of their lives.

    We all want to fuck hot women. We all perceive hotness is BASICALLY the same way. But in terms of what we find deeply fulfilling, it can differ slightly. I like to hit up clubs and bars until I strike gold and just fuck / spin the ones on the way. I'm happy to spin and spin until I find the one, I find the nightlife fun and great for developing game.

    You might find it dull, shallow, and overpriced, and a complete waste of time.

    That's OK. RP is not about "all people are identical" but rather "all people want similar things and have similar urges. You're completely right about club girls not being worth the promotion to LTR. But unless you have a better way to access the 9s en masse, it's really your best bet. You're not fucking 9s off the internet, generally you want to not fuck your office hos, and that just leaves social circle / friends of friends. Of which most just won't be hot. Every social gathering will have maybe 1 truly hot girl (whereas a packed LA club will have 100... waiting in line to get in.)

    Both sexual strategies are perfectly valid (social game, club / cold approach game). I'd imagine that most guys will switch back between the two depending on what stage of their life they are in (social game in college, graduate and move to the city as a young professional, hit up the club game, etc).

    [–]Red_SoloCup 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    It depends on the situation, but I generally agree.

    My first girlfriend (and most serious one, we dated for quite some time) and I were best friends for years beforehand. I always wanted her, but fucked up my chance when I first met her (I was exceedingly BP). I had some other girls in the meantime, but none even measured close to her. I pedestalized the fuck out of this chick.

    Anyway, we finally started dating and it wasn't as great as I thought it would be (as you would expect) but the sex was fucking unreal. By far the best sex I've ever had, and I know for a fact she'll say the same. I would definitely attribute that to how well I knew her before we had sex as well as how long it took for us to finally fuck. Now, if a girl is too easy for me to get with I immediately relegate her to plate/hookup status and get bored really quickly, so I definitely know where you're coming from.

    What I mean by a girl you actually want to be in an LTR with is a girl who you actually really enjoy being around besides sex. I haven't met one since that girl and I'm not gonna get into an LTR until I do, so I never really have that awesome sex we all want.

    Do you think you might just be looking in the wrong places? One of my buddies used to say "If you want a fuck, go to a bar. If you want a girl, go to a church."

    EDIT: formatting.

    [–]NOFAPFOOL 7 points8 points  (12 children)

    I found TRP from someone referring me from NOFAP. I read what you said and it seems you may want to try going NOFAP for a month and giving yourself what they call a REBOOT. I tried it and it is what spurred me to stop being a beta AFC and take life by the balls. Not masterbating for 1 week gives your body 45 percent more testosterone. I could go on and on about what the benefits could be for you but head over to NOFAP and see what you think. It worked for me.

    [–]Shaft-of-Patriarchy 2 points3 points  (11 children)

    How do the numbers compare for sex?

    One preumes that from a T levels perspective an ejaculation is an ejaculation.

    Meaning one should abstain from both to get any benefit

    [–]NOFAPFOOL 0 points1 point  (10 children)

    Well the testosterone level would still decrease but why waste it? If you are caught in a cycle of lost testosterone levels and no validation through actual intercourse with a women it becomes a problem. PMO can cause much more problems than an abundance of casual sex would. I think it is the ultimate beta thing to do! Watching some other guy screw an attractive women is beta.

    [–]1oldredder -1 points0 points  (8 children)

    why is watching another guy screw porn?

    I don't watch that almost ever.

    I'll watch a girl make herself cum, mostly a zoom-in scene right between her legs. No guy at all.

    No damage. Just entertaining.

    [–]NOFAPFOOL -1 points0 points  (7 children)

    Whatever you say man. Porn is beta in my book.

    [–]1oldredder -2 points-1 points  (6 children)

    then your book is wrong.

    Beta is supplicating to others who are alpha, who are women. Seeking their guidance and approval.

    Nothing else is beta.

    [–]NOFAPFOOL -1 points0 points  (5 children)

    I think we are left with a grey area on that desctiption. Watching an alpha fuck the girl you would like to fuck is beta in my book. I get a lot of negative vibes when I state my opinion on this matter but I think it strikes a nerve with some people because porn is a vice they are not willing to give up.

    [–]1oldredder -1 points0 points  (4 children)

    so I never watch the alpha fuck the girl. I watch the girl fuck herself alone. Or I watch 3 girls fuck each other with their tongues.

    You're understanding me, right? That porn doesn't require any men in it?

    It seems no one will dare accept this is true in any reply and it seems that porn isn't really a vice any more than taking a walk, playing a hand of poker or even reading a book. It's an activity that has some amount of time consumption & some reward or can be boring too.

    Giving up the good things in life is stupid. Nofap is giving up the best orgasms with the least hassle from women who lie, cheat & steal to get their way. I can't imagine leading a bullshit life where I refuse to masturbate and instead torment myself daily with seeking women who will mistreat me every chance they can just so I might get my dick wet.

    What an absurd waste of time. When the girls behave right I'll fuck them. When they act like entitled bitches I'll toss them aside as they are unworthy of my time and then I'll either rub one out - with or without porn - or get an escort.

    Nofap has the combined dual failure of punishing sex drive and insisting that self-torment is better than self-pleasure.

    Porn is almost irrelevant. Masturbation doesn't require porn and porn doesn't require masturbation. For every picture or video I've masturbated to there's easily hundreds I just looked at with boredom & erased.

    [–]NOFAPFOOL -1 points0 points  (3 children)

    You seem to be very dependent on your porn. Dont knock it till you try it. There are many benefits to having increased testosterone and focusing energy toward physical gains rather than virtual satisfaction like world of warcraft shit. The only other thing I have to say to you on this subject is I bet you cant make it one month PMO free. Let alone going monk mode and completely eliminating vices in your life.

    [–]smokingmonkey420 4 points5 points  (2 children)

    I can get behind this much more than I can OP. This culture we live in is absolutely crazy-obsessed with sex and to suggest that MORE casual sex is the answer seems a bit clueless.

    I'm probably not going to make any fans with this but I think if you want to have a successful relationship with someone, you should probably get to know the person FIRST before you start having sex with them. Give it a few months. Find out if she's a bitch/slut or not. The actual "good girls" out there will respect this, and your much more likely to find one if you're not wasting time with casual sex.

    Think about it. Before birth control and condoms, that's the way it was. Because sex meant babies and a lifetime commitment for both parties. It was never intended to be something "casual."

    So that's my two cents. Don't worry about casual sex as much as molding yourself into the man you want to be. Once you do that, the girls will come all on their own.

    [–]Elodrian 8 points9 points  (1 child)

    Because sex meant babies and a lifetime commitment for both parties. It was never intended to be something "casual"

    Alternative: Humans lived in bands/tribes and women would engage in "casual" sex with all the men. Pregnancy would ensue but since no one was entirely confident about paternity, the tribe looked after all the children communaly.

    I don't know if this is what actually happens in a state of nature, but as evo-devo hypotheses go it also accounts for the data point of female hypergamy. The real point is that we shouldn't be hasty when it comes to assuming evolutionary histories that result in 1950's nuclear families. That might be an aberration.

    [–]smokingmonkey420 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    That's a valid point and I can see how that makes more sense than what I said. The major difference between then and now is that everyone knew each other in that tribe and had each other's backs. That's why it worked. Today -- not so much.

    [–]qwerty_asd 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    Preferring masterbation to casual sex is pretty common. The easiest way to flip that table is to masterbate less.

    [–]xiko 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    The way I spin my plates are like a mini-ltr. They all know that I am not exclusive. I see each of them about 3-4 times a month. I do things that I like to do with each of them. I like to go eat something, movies, dance, cuddle in the coach and spooning, etc.

    I realized that I can do all the good things I liked to do in a LTR with multiple girls. And because you have plenty of plates it is harder to drop frame because you will naturally have an abundance mentality.

    [–]Goupidan 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    We're all wired differently in the brain. I'm kind of like you, but I'll need to experiment more to be sure how I really am.

    [–]1oldredder 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    aim for hotter until it works.

    If it works, great. If not, at least you gave it a try.

    [–]HS-Thompson 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    If this is genuinely how you feel you should follow your own preferences, not do things to conform to group mentality, even a group as enlightened as this one.

    With that said, I think you might want to spend significant energy trying to figure out if you have some anxieties or hangups that are getting in the way of you enjoying casual sex before you decide you're the one in a million shot that doesn't like picking up hot girls and fucking them.

    [–]ultrasuperthrowaway 22 points23 points  (1 child)

    I always feel amazing even without sleep I am able to take on any challenge once I've fucked a hot woman I just met. It gives you the confidence and happiness you need to meet the next one and it's a beautiful spiral of experiences that makes up life.

    [–]FrameWalker 13 points14 points  (0 children)

    The chemicals keep you wide awake

    [–][deleted] 8 points9 points  (22 children)

    It appears I need to get laid more, but I don't feel like taking the steps of getting laid more. My game is tight, I just don't go out of my way to meet new girls because I don't care.

    [–]magicalbird 7 points8 points  (11 children)

    I know that feeling with approach apathy.

    You can pull okay girls yet laziness kicks in.

    [–][deleted] 24 points25 points  (10 children)

    Beautiful term.

    I know I am the shit, I got charm and game and get status real quick where I go, I am doing awesome shit, I'm a good fuck, I just don't want to break my schedule to interview myself to some chick because she was born with perky titties and a cute face, especially if it leads to further disruptions of what I like doing.

    Usually what happens is a long enough dry spell will occur, I'll make it my mission to get laid again to prove to myself I still got it, then stop caring again.

    [–]magicalbird 14 points15 points  (0 children)

    If possible, a low key friends with benefits could benefit you.

    [–]MrMagwitch 5 points6 points  (6 children)

    .

    [–]FrameWalker 5 points6 points  (5 children)

    tldr; I can't believe I actually have to talk to girls for an hour before I sleep with them.

    On one hand I could say go find higher quality girls - but I'm not sure that would resolve the issue. If you focus on fun activities that you'll be doing anyway, it should feel less like you're a performing monkey.

    [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (1 child)

    Don't get me wrong, I enjoy a feminine girl, but I don't have a lot of crossover activities with women.

    [–]Purecorrupt 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    I'd say anything that involves doing something over a sit down dinner sounds better. Than again that takes more effort. Mini golf - a zoo - jazz club. It helps get rid of awkward silence I'd there's something to listen to or action you can take.

    [–]BlackHeart89 2 points3 points  (1 child)

    it should feel less like you're a performing monkey.

    Lol this is exactly how I feel. Which in turns makes me not want to put in the effort. Similar to the other guy, I'll eventually be hit with a long enough drought. Half the time, if I know the woman wants to fuck, thats almost good enough me. I live with my mother. So the planning and money (hotel) it would take is very discouraging. I can barely bring myself to approaching a woman because of this...

    [–]1oldredder 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    The planning & cost are worth it if the lay is worth it.

    I live alone but I'm not bringing strange bitches in. Motel room or her place works for me.

    [–]MrMagwitch 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    .

    [–]bigsammy90 0 points1 point  (1 child)

    Many a man on his death bed will tell you he should have bed more young women while he had the chance. It truly is one of the greatest pleasures if the the best.

    [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    I do in fact regret the chicks I could have banged but didn't.

    [–]1kingofpoplives 3 points4 points  (8 children)

    My game is tight, I just don't go out of my way to meet new girls because I don't care.

    This is why I troll Tinder and OKCupid for prospective plates when I'm bored at work. Eager plates, delivered to your handheld device.

    [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (7 children)

    I am near 30 and know nothing of these, are they worth getting on? How does it work? Is it actual quality lays/fwbs?

    [–]1kingofpoplives 2 points3 points  (5 children)

    are they worth getting on?

    Tinder in particular is a game changer. Being single will never be the same.

    How does it work?

    You flip through pics and decide to "like" or "reject". If you and a girl both "like" each other you both get a match notification and the ability to message each other.

    Is it actual quality lays/fwbs?

    There are definitely extremely hot women on the app, but just like in real life, it is very hard to bang the top tier. Getting lays from 5-7 is quite easy. 8 and up happens, but it's less common and your game needs to be strong.

    If you are sober, like your username suggests (I am sober myself), then apps like this are awesome because you get a lot of dates without ever having to step foot in a bar.

    [–][deleted] 1 point2 points  (4 children)

    Is it worth having a very ostentatious picture up for yourself? I don't want to be yet another Todd on there. "Hey I like rock climbing and art and ultimate frisbee".

    [–]1kingofpoplives 2 points3 points  (2 children)

    Yea, you need to be attractive and have pics where you look good or you won't get any matches.

    [–][deleted] -1 points0 points  (1 child)

    Selfies work, or should it be a having fun pic. I don't have a lot of those. I mostly gym and work.

    [–]1kingofpoplives -1 points0 points  (0 children)

    Do the best you can. Selfies can be fine for face pics but it always helps to have some social proof. Tinder lets you choose pics from your Facebook profile.

    [–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    I would make your default a shirtless pic if you're muscular.

    You need to show that you're:

    Good looking (Nice clothes or muscles)

    Know how to have fun (doing a hobby or adventure, smiling)

    Have a healthy social life (with friends or at a social gathering)

    Then from there on out it's just text game.

    [–]BlackHeart89 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

    I hear good things about tinder if you're attractive. I don't have a facebook, so I can't utilize it.

    But the other apps are "blah". Most of the women are their for validation or the ones that are DTF are usually 6's and below. Some 7's. All of them online perceive their SMV to be much higher than it actually is because of the guys from all over who are willing to now hit on a girl 2+ pts lower. Some you will pull. But the amount of effort you'll have to put into is better spent talking to women in person. Their, they can get a better feel of your demeanor and sense of humor, etc.

    But if you don't get that opportunity very often, its cool.

    [–]thedarkstranger 5 points6 points  (2 children)

    I think maybe replace 'validation' with 're-affirmation'. I'm already validated due to the fact I'm an awesome dude. A girl having sex with me re-affirms this so I am not invalidated if I don't get laid.

    [–]magicalbird 7 points8 points  (0 children)

    /u/thedarkstranger reframed OP in a slightly healthier mindset.

    However OP is also right.

    [–]hohamocha 6 points7 points  (0 children)

    Also women have sex with guys who have been sexually validated by other women. Preselection.

    [–]PracticallyAlpha 5 points6 points  (2 children)

    Is there any research done on the correlation between the attractiveness of sexual partners and the degree of change in the chemical composition of the brain post-coitus? Somebody get MentalFloss on this ASAP.

    [–]magicalbird 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    A self-reported study (so take it with a grain of salt) of women reported what gave them the strongest orgasms. The three traits in a male were his shoulder width, his wealth, and his self confidence.

    As for men I'm pretty sure it has to do with the female's physical attractiveness.

    [–]ROTHSCHILD_GOON_1913 12 points13 points  (5 children)

    hahahaha, man whatever happened to the legitimate philosophical content in this subreddit? we have a stickied post at the top about "why casual sex is important", complete with an in-depth explanation about why deliberately engineered self-validation is important. are you kidding me?

    can the next stickied post be a primer on how to use various drug cocktails to release the appropriate neurotransmitters to make myself feel pleasured and content? might as well just go straight past the middle-man. or middle-women, in this case.

    chasing validation never works for anyone, ever. it doesn't work for self-centered women, it doesn't work for you, it doesn't work for anyone. this crap is worse than a $30 self-help scam book.

    [–]RPLTR -1 points0 points  (2 children)

    I don't know why but I just can't get behind this article.

    If you turn fucking a hot woman into a chemistry lesson it really takes some of the fun out. And if this HB9 is holding me after an awesome sex session then I'm just enjoying the moment, I'm not feeling validated or about what my next goal is.

    I still don't feel like I can articulate what I want to say but yeah, I agree with what you've said here.

    [–]scrumptious_titties 4 points5 points  (1 child)

    I'm just enjoying the moment, I'm not feeling validated

    Where do you think that joy comes from?

    [–]1oldredder 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    hand still on a nice tit?

    I always liked that part. Or getting hard again because I'm right up against her and fucking her some more. That's also a good part of the cuddles.

    [–]KissTheBridesmaid 3 points4 points  (0 children)

    This is exactly why this post is so important. I see too many people here talking about sex like it should never be pursued, like it is something dangerous that will damage you and keep you from your true goal. Guys, we are biologically hardwired to want, no, NEED sex. And let’s not pretend like we are not all here for this reason. The only reason why people are saying to not chase women and focus on yourself, is because we know that that is the best way to get women.

    We all want sex, fucking admit it to yourself, and if you are not getting any, you are not doing it right.

    Stop coming here to be validated for not getting any by pretending like you are doing it on purpose.

    [–]∞ Red Pill VisionaryRollo-Tomassi 3 points4 points  (0 children)

    http://therationalmale.com/2013/06/26/you-need-sex/

    Big Heads and Little Heads

    One very common dismissal of red pill awareness I read from blue pill men is this feigned, blasé indifference to sex.

    “All that Red Pill, PUA shit is for guy’s who obsess over sex. They only go to the lengths they do to get laid and never see the bigger picture. You don’t need sex you know, you wont die from not getting laid.”

    For the most part this pseudo-indifference is really a feminized, conditioned, response couched in Beta Game. The idea, of course, is for the blue pill guy to promote the public perception that he’s above his sexual impulses in the hopes that any girl within earshot (or reading his comments online) will recognize his uniqueness in not letting his cock do his thinking for him. From a male deductive logic standpoint it makes sense to the feminized male – women have all told him how put off they are with guys who only think about sex, so he’ll identify with the women he’d like to get with and “not be like other guys.“

    Boys subscribing to this identification usually find themselves sexually frustrated by the very women they hope to connect with in their sexual indifference because, on a core level, women are psychologically insulted by men who actively desexualize themselves in order to get with them. Despite every verbal protestation women can muster, women are aroused by, and ego-affirmed by, Men who unashamedly display the covert social cues of wanting to fuck them.

    Thats the Beta Game behind the “you don’t need sex” Buffer, but there’s more too this rationale than that. Technically the Beta reasoning is correct; physically, you’re not going to die if you don’t get laid. You could probably masturbate to relieve yourself or live a sexless existence due to a physical disability and live a productive life as satisfying as you can manage it. If you don’t know what you’re missing or if a sexual substitute does the job, what’s the difference, right? The line of reasoning is that if it isn’t food, water or oxygen it isn’t really a necessity for existence.

    Desexualizing yourself is (ineffective) Beta Game.

    [–]analfuck 4 points5 points  (0 children)

    It does not matter if it is a 2-9 when I cum it feels the same.

    [–]Redpillc0re 2 points3 points  (0 children)

    What you experience is euphoria, not validation. Endorphins make you feel invincible. If you consider her "validation" as the source of such euphoria, you are giving up a lot of control to women, which is a dangerous road.

    And no, you don't become an astronaut or a surgeon by fucking 9s and 10s. It may enhance your selfconfidence but in the end its your hard work that counts. That is exactly why sometimes goodlooking people are labeled as dumb. People treat them as if they are the shit, and they become conditioned to be lazy.

    [–]YouAreAlwaysAlone 2 points3 points  (2 children)

    While I agree that casual sex is a very healthy, rectifying experience, the benefits fall with redundancy. Fucking a new 8 gives you serious validation, but fucking her for the 20th time that month?

    I think the health benefit you've discussed really comes from fucking a new women. And I theorize that the reason this happens is because the male should mate with many females to spread his genes.

    Fucking a new woman = chemical waterfall

    Fucking the same woman = small stream not worth writing home about.

    [–]1oldredder -1 points0 points  (0 children)

    meh, I feel the opposite. No emotional tie but the sex gets better the more there is with the same girl. Start over with a new girl & it's all different things she'll prefer, different details in escalation. Starting over every single time would be boring as shit.

    Then again I don't give a flying fuck about validation. I actually just want an orgasm that is so good I won't forget about it next year much less a month later.

    [–]TommyVercettiBitch 1 point2 points  (1 child)

    I think casual sex only gratifies that your game is right, that's it. It's an empty, hollow game.

    [–]chameleonrp[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Empty, hollow game for an empty, hollow person.

    [–]magicalbird 1 point2 points  (1 child)

    Setting them too high makes aspiring betas miss out on 5s and 6s that are trying to jump you and give you the experience for 8s and 9s.

    Once you have the experience it doesn't even matter if the girl is a plate or with you in a relationship (for the time being).

    [–]achtung_b4by 1 point2 points  (0 children)

    I'm 23 and I've been on TRP for about a year, and I still have not gone on a date. I keep thinking there's something wrong with me. I still masturbate but I can't bring myself to do anything with women.

    [–]c_anthony 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    I tell you what, the thing that sucks about this is that, as someone who suffers from OCD, casual sex has become a pain in the ass. I envy you folks. Go out and fuck freely you magnificent bastards.

    [–]589547521563 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    But what if I really don't want intimacy and/or sex? Wtf am I supposed to do now? How can I get the same chemicals without this intimacy or sex stuff? I heard LSD was pretty good or shrooms.

    [–]thewheelofza 0 points1 point  (1 child)

    Great post OP. Frequent validation is psychologically so important to keep your mood up. What's the downside to experiencing validation to often?

    [–]chameleonrp[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

    I'm all for recreational drug use. But what's bad about rolling on MDMA every day? Sex is a drug.

    [–]NOFAPFOOL 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Well put sir! I am currently working on being the best flying trapeze catcher in the country. It is a very lofty goal and is taking a lot of focus and energy but I keep in mind how many panties will drop for me after spotting women in the crowd and winking at them from the catchers trap.

    [–]TheOneThatSaysBMF 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Treat sex like a potent medication – self-control must be exercised with it, or serious consequences may occur (oneitis, or worse, STDs).

    This shit right here is fucking MONEY. Never thought of approaching it this way, but the clarification I got from this one line made my day.

    [–]circlhat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Validation can also be described as a sensation of “completeness,”

    Validating yourself though women has brought a lot of good in my life, it made me stronger, faster smarter , and forced me to push myself to achieve my goals.

    However it is all just a mask, and will always be a mask to hide a insecurity, the fear of being alone , its not that guys get oneitis and care about the female its the fear of being along.

    This is psychologically damaging me, but in a good way(I can walk away easier).

    TRP says a girl that is a slut is not good LTR because she is damage psychologically, when in reality she realizes you are just cells that release her cells.

    In other words, what makes her bad for a LTR is that she realizes there is nothing special about your dick.

    This is what you are preaching to us, that we sleep around to remove the novelty of human, but only for guys and not for girls?

    [–]Masonjarteadrinker2 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Bra-fucken-vo that was an interesting read indeed. Good stuff my friend, and I totally feel like a bad ass whenever I bed a hot woman. I have caught the oneitis before because they don't come around as often as i'd like but I am working on that.

    [–]99_Problem 0 points1 point  (0 children)

    Great sex is great.

    Seriously, it's as important to a guy's health as eating, lifting, sleeping, etc.

    [–]MrMagwitch -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

    .